TMA Fans When They Heard That Jmart Died Separately 20 Years Ago

mannerisms paralleled

Hey Netflix, quick question

Are you brain dead ? Are you stupid? Why would you cancel one of your most popular series, one that probably got you ALOT of money. Like genuinely what was the thought process, was it to make another big mouth season?

Watching school spirits was a rollercoaster ride between characters I love and some I can’t stand, but the one thing that stuck out to me was Xaiver’s blue eyes and his inability to blink

Update us when they finally listen to it 🗣️🗣️

How I look trying to convince my friends to listen to epic: the musical

I’m still thinking about the hyacinth disaster, that podcast was certainly something, it literally said disaster in the name

Hermes and Tiresias epic moment🫦(Coming from a conversation I had with my friend)

magnus protocol episode 11 recap

@kabookachowiced are you ready king???? (gonna post this after but STILL)

HUH? WHO? WHAT WAS THAT? "JACK" ??

alice is so fucking funny it almost makes me forget the horrors

WDYM CELIA AND GWEN AREN'T??? THERE??? GWENNNNYYY????????????

feeling like you're being watched huh alice? huh alice? huh alice? fuck.

JON!!!!!!!!! JONNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

uh oh, uh oh, obsessed with a dead body, uh oh, uh oh

tattoos? like ink5oul? is this statement too old for them to be related..

"the deep will care for his bones" HEY. DID YOU THROW HIM INTO THE OCEAN?

"i need to know what's in the water" please stop hon please i think it's too late for you but please

ok not really an appropriate time but i am so fucking happy that we're getting creepy ocean stuff because i really love creepy ocean stuff and it works so well with like the vast? this is NOT the vast though but that is ok

"what have i told you about thinking?"/"[sigh].. don't." i love them so much

gwenny gwen gwen are you OKAY honey i love you too much for you to be in danger

"thank you, alice" DYHARD DYHARD DYHARD DYHARD

THE STATIC WHEN CELIA SAID THERE WAS A FAMILY EMERGENCY? did you all see the post about how the static appears when characters lie? that was really interesting i wish i remembered who posted it

"you should get to work, otherwise you'll never get out of here" no fucking way. no fucking way.

"i KNOW. mr bonzo" WEEPING LMFOAOOOO

begging on my hands and knees that the name and address was NOT to gerry kaey's residence this time

Bronya: [knocking on Cocolia's bedroom door]

Serval, opening door, half asleep: Yeah?

Bronya: …Isn't this Mother's house?

Serval: I got it in the divorce.

Bronya: What?

Serval: What?

Cocolia, from somewhere inside: What the fuck, Serval?

Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:

You’re an idiot.

Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.

Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.

And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:

Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.

Nope.

My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.

You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.

And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.

What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.

I just want a burrito.

In conclusion:

You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.

UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:

A fucking fork?

I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.

If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.

That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.

Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.

A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.

People eat burritos with forks?

God is sorry he made us.

(Source)

You better pray and hope that they bring him back

my life now relies on monty somehow returning to being a human and making regular appearances in season 2

@kabookachowiced is on the verge of killing me about him