The Ruins Of Eden

I got too excited while playing chess and told my opponent that I was going to slit his throat and slaughter him like a hog. something to work on for next time

Me: *stubs my toe* "AH FUCK!"

Mass of quivering flesh that's been growing in my cabinet and slowly feeding off my suffering until it develops sentience: *takes first breath*

Everyone clap for non consensual body modification everybody loves a character whose body has been altered against their will

Interview with the cheerleader

Im enjoying the longevity of tumblrs recontextualization style of humor. a seemingly innocuous post followed by like "posts that a gnome would make" or like "are you a phone"

bastard sounds great in an irish accent. if an irish person calls you a 'daft bastard' it just feels right

the welsh have the monopoly on things ending in hell. fuckin hell and bloody hell hit different in a welsh accent. its like music to my ears

the scots have piss and shite for sure. "its pishin it doon out there" "this is a load of shite" absolute poetry

if i may speak for the english i think we do penis related words very well. dickhead, knobhead, bellend, etc.

and for all the shit we give them, you gotta admit that no one can deliver a 'goddamn' quite like an american. theres a certain weight to it that you just cant achieve in other accents. when an american says goddamn you know shit just got real

Andreas fra symesterskapet vs programleder fra mgp i den stygge dressen: slagutveksling på parkeringsplassen.