I hate the fact that sometimes it feels like I have to apologize for being a quiet person. I’m not broken. Don’t project your discomfort onto someone you don’t understand. Stop trying to prod and “fix” me. It’s annoying as shit. My silence is not your puzzle to solve. I speak when I have something to say. My quietness doesn’t mean I am disconnected. I’m constantly processing. Constantly watching and observing. It just so happens that I open up more to people don’t demand anything from me. Why do you flinch at my stillness? Bruh, people are annoying as hell.
sometimes i fantasize about splitting into two and having sex with myself 😔 i need to experience myself externally. u get?
when you grew up as a lonely uncool girl it will never stop haunting you by the way. you will meet a cool person at a bar or the train station or at a friend's party and you can wear your most stylish outfit and striking eye makeup and you will swear that they can see through all of the facade and see the lonely terribly insecure teenage girl you used to be who desperately wanted to connect and you will swear that they know that there is like an insurmountable gap between you. this will happen forever
Jan Baiboon by Riccardo Apostolico for DNA Magazine April 2025
I don’t know if I want to be known by you
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