Chai Tea Bag + Lil But Of Brown Sugar + Apple Cider Packet + 16 Oz. Mug Of Hot But Not Quite Boiling

Musings part 209

Is loving a part of hurting or is hurting a part of loving

We meet someone who makes us smile and happy and excited but they also make us sad, hurt and upset

It’s like a dance between two souls, is it a forever dance? Where we find each other and do the dance in every single life time?

Or is this life time sadly not the forever after one but the dance one

I’ll never know, all I know is, in every moment that I am not with you, I long to be.

parent-child dynamics are soooo crazy. i love you i resent you i can't stand you i adore you i pity you. and still watching your hair get a little more grey every time i see you makes my stomach feel weird

Sometimes it pays to be embarrassed by a romantic partner or prospect for you to start to see clearly if a relationship makes sense or not

Shame can be strong teacher to re asses s situation

To The Person Who Walked Past The Window - Jordan Bolton

My first book ‘Blue Sky Through the Window of a Moving Car’ is now available to pre-order! Get it here - https://smarturl.it/BlueSky

Dualities exist

You can both be in love and know you can’t be together.

You can both want to have the same thing but life keeps pulling you apart

You can both not breathe properly without the other person but have to go on living

Dualities don’t just disappear then bore deep into your heart and your only job is to try with all your might to hold both thoughts and hope there is some peace as you move forward

You know “do it scared” is a legit CBT technique called Behavioral Activation. The basic tenet of it is that there’s a thing you have to do for your wellbeing that you’re having an emotion about (that you’re scared), and thoughts about (that you don’t want to do it) but the easiest thing to change out of the three of those (behavior, thoughts, emotions) is the behavior itself.

Because actually doing the work to change the emotion or thought so you want to do the thing is gonna take all day, but going and doing the thing without changing the thought or emotion is gonna take you like 10 seconds. And then once the thing is done (or started) your thoughts and emotions about it are kind of automatically different than they were before.

Doing it scared literally makes you less scared.

Note: it’s not the quick fix that avoiding the behavior is. It’s gonna take a lot of doing it scared before you get to do it not scared. But the difference is you’re doing it. And you’re building up to a day when doing it isn’t the worst thing you’ve ever done.

From the beginning

It never was

I was never the one

I ain’t even in the running

Sometimes we fall into the in between

A neither here or there situation

It might seem familiar but there are no guidelines

It’s like groping in the dark for a version of something that might or might not exist

Hearts breaking, thoughts spiraling

How do you navigate a path that has never been crossed

Am I ambitious

I have dreams, goals, things I want to do the kind of life I want to live but am i ambitious? I feel like I want to achieve my goals but also sleep when I need to or even want to, I want to have this lifestyle but actually have time to be in it.

Now I am not interested in being a new bill gates or Elon musk because I feel that kind of success defeats the purpose, your time, mind and life is perpetually occupied with one thing and for me that’s not exactly living