^what He Said

NPR.org

What Happens When A Country Bans Spanking?

Researchers look at countries that have prohibited corporal punishment for kids and their rate of youth violence.

Now a new study looking at 400,000 youths from 88 countries around the world suggests such bans are making a difference in reducing youth violence. It marks the first systematic assessment of whether an association exists between a ban on corporal punishment and the frequency in which adolescents get into fights. 

Grown women who mock 10-year-old girls on tiktok for using too much makeup and skincare are so ironic and painful to watch.

Acting like these girls didn’t get their ideas from you. They were listening when you were telling them how you should start your retinol treatment as young as you can. They were listening when you told them 30 step routine is a game changer. They were looking at you, at women on the billboards, magazine covers and in the TV shows with perfect skin, perfect eyeshadows, perfect hair and realised they should do the same, they should start as young as they can or it would be too late.

These girls are present when you mock other women for their age. Young women ages 20-30 get bullied for having normal faces. “Oh my god i thought you were 50” at a woman who is clearly in her thirties.

These “helpful tips” how to not get wrinkles which include don’t lift your eyebrows, don’t emote in general, use anti-wrinkle straws, don’t forget to get botox on time.

Red light therapy, sleeping with your mouth sealed, in one position on your back so either side of your face won’t get squished and swollen.

But these little girls are funny, yeah, let’s mock them. Why don’t you mock the promoters of these ideas? Why don’t you mock billion dollar industries? 10-year-olds at Sephora are funny, I wonder if you find the absence of women with real faces on screens as funny

I saw a vid of this girl talking about her complicated feelings about Botox that essentially boiled down to: 1. We don’t live in a vacuum, ageism is a thing, looking good means I get treated better and I should take advantage of that, but, 2. Me getting Botox reinforces beauty standards on other women, and even young girls.

And I just get so frustrated because this “nuance” was very well received, and it really feels like sooo many women are constantly choosing between “this is a way for ME to feel good/gain an advantage” and “this is what’s best for women as a collective” and the collective often loses. :/ I feel like a broken record but I really really want women to stop prioritizing “advantages” that ultimately hurt our gender as a class. There’s no way out with this framework.

That wasn’t the original argument. Op didn’t say, ‘JK Rowling does a lot for women but her posts are bad’ it says ‘Rowling isn’t a feminist just Gender Critical.’ That’s why her actual feminist actions are relevant in this conversation in the same way it’d be relevant to bring up The Carnegie Foundation if we were talking about his views and influence on education (but obviously not if we were talking about all the horrible shit he did for workers rights.)

j.k. rowling is probably the biggest example of why i say that TERFs and GC’s aren’t the same group of people and they have a different orientation towards enforcing patriarchy. because rowling isn’t even pretending to be a “feminist.” she never posts about feminist politics. she’s a straight woman doing what they do best i fear (derogatory).

Actually you know what, that element of the reply was fair we should absolutely be arguing about the lack of ethics regarding the constant monitoring state we’re in. It’s fucked up that vulnerable people can have their most horrific moments shared online forever without their permission with the only recourse being maybe the site might take it down possibly if they ask with no actual guarantee. It’s really gross that one crap moment could end up ruining your life because now your potential employer sees you as ‘unstable’ or ‘bad for the company’s image’. Why are we as a society acting like that’s fine?

Tbh one of my peaking moments was when female people not being comfortable around males post assault was brought up as a case for female only shelters existing in tandem with gender neutral ones. And the universal response was, ‘traumatized female people aren’t allowed their trauma. They should get over it.’ Unlike Transwomen who never should be expected to sacrifice anything for even a second, abuse victims are fine to throw under the bus.

( @womenaremypriority for the text post; aesthetic meme is mine @hyacinthsgrimoire )

challenge for tumblr: view a post that says "it's good when women reject societal pressure and forgo shaving + make-up" and accept it at that. maybe even add something productive. anything but tired what-about-isms. please