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Lust, Love, and the Sweet, Sweet Burn: Writing Romance That Makes Readers Feel

Let’s talk romance—specifically the kind that makes readers scream into pillows, clutch their chests, and whisper “just kiss already” at the page. Whether you're a seasoned romance author or just dipping your toes into the love pool, there's one golden truth to remember: good romance is about *tension*. And tension lives in the delicious space between lust and love.

First Comes Lust…

Lust is that electric charge between characters. It’s the stolen glances, the way one of them notices the other's hands or voice or the way they lean in a little too close when they talk. Lust is immediate. It’s instinctual. And let’s be honest, it’s fun as hell to write.

But if you stop there—if all your characters do is pine and make out and pine some more—you risk making it all surface-level. Lust is the spark, but it’s not the whole fire.

Then Comes Love (Eventually)

Love, real love, is slower. It’s about trust, vulnerability, and seeing the other person fully—flaws, baggage, weird hobbies and all—and still leaning in. It happens in the quiet moments: making tea for someone who's had a bad day, remembering how they take their coffee, watching them geek out about something they care about. That’s where readers fall with your characters.

The magic is in the shift—when your characters go from “I want to kiss you until my brain falls out” to “I’d burn the world down if it meant keeping you safe.” It doesn’t happen all at once. And that’s where the slow burn comes in.

Ah, the Slow Burn: Delicious Torture

Slow burn romance is a masterclass in delayed gratification. It's all about restraint. You’re letting readers live in the tension—the almost-touches, the lingering stares, the confessions that never quite happen. And every time the characters get this close to admitting their feelings or acting on them and then don’t? Readers get more hooked.

But here’s the key: something has to be progressing. Slow burn doesn’t mean nothing happens. It means everything matters. 

Every moment builds the foundation. Every emotional beat gets us one step closer to that glorious payoff.

Think of it like cooking over a low flame. You’re letting the flavors deepen. So when the first kiss finally lands? It’s earned. It’s fireworks. It matters.

Tips for Writing a Killer Slow Burn

- Give them obstacles. Emotional baggage, clashing goals, external threats—give your characters legit reasons not to jump into bed right away.

- Let them see each other. Intimacy isn’t just physical. Let your characters learn each other’s fears, dreams, scars.

- Build micro-tension. Hands grazing. One of them patching the other up after a fight. A joke that turns into a confession. Let every small moment do work.

- Make the payoff worth it. When they finally get together—make it satisfying. Let it feel like the culmination of everything they’ve been through.

Don’t Just Make Them Hot—Make Them Real

It’s easy to write about two people who are attracted to each other. What’s harder—and infinitely more rewarding—is writing two people who choose each other. Who grow, change, fight, make up, and fall deeper the whole time.

So go ahead. Light the match. Let them burn slowly. And when your readers are begging for that kiss? That’s how you know you’ve done it right.

There's an undeniable sexual tension between Bromine and Mercury, the only two elements in natural liquid phase

Go write!

Bad news, y'all

You really gotta write the damn book to become a published author

Dialogue Responses

"Don't look at me like that."

"I can't help it."

"Simply impossible."

"Just don't look back."

"I'm not looking at you."

"Then stop being so cute."

"How am I looking at you?"

"Why? Does it bother you?"

"Can't take my eyes off of you."

"Sorry, but it will happen again."

"How would you like me to look at you?"

All the Dialogue Responses can be found here.

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As a reader: I hate when writers do this

As a writer: AHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAAAAAAA suffer <3

My favorite kind of romance is when they’re so close to kissing but then someone interrupts or one of them gets scared and just backs away. Pain.

APRIL FOOL 1959 Anne Sexton: A Self-Portrait in Letters First published: 1977

Something I made while dealing with my own stuff and hoping drawing this would pick me up somehow. Maybe it worked.

FT my cat. His name is Mischief

hello! i'm trying to write a manipulative/cunning character that uses his charm to get what he wants, but i'm unsure how to go about it without being too overt. he basically acts all polite and uses peoples' inherent biases (like how they are more likely to listen to or trust someone who's conventionally attractive)

i'm also struggling to come up with instances where he'd use those skills. surely he can't just walk up to somebody and say something out of nowhere haha

thank you for your time!

That’s such a fun character to write! For subtle manipulation, focus on how he frames things—he never demands, just suggests. He compliments before slipping in a request, or pretends to confide in someone to earn their trust.

Manipulation has three core tactics:

Mirroring – He subtly copies people's tone, body language, or opinions to build fast rapport. People feel more at ease when they see themselves in someone else.

Framing choices – He never gives direct orders. Instead, he offers two options—both benefiting him—but makes one seem like the “better” or more moral choice.

Playing the victim or the hero – Depending on what the situation calls for, he knows when to act vulnerable to gain sympathy, or when to seem competent and generous to earn loyalty.

As for scenes: think small but calculated moments—like offering help so he can later call in a favor, or using flattery to get into private conversations. His charm should feel effortless, like everything he does just naturally benefits him. Let people want to say yes to him, because why wouldn't they? He'd never do anything wrong!

Use foreshadowing and drop hints through your scenes too, like:

He helps a powerful person in public (small act, big praise), later using that goodwill to get access somewhere.

He praises someone’s intelligence just before suggesting a risky plan—making them feel clever for agreeing.

He eavesdrops, then later "guesses" something personal about someone to seem insightful and trustworthy.

Basically, his charm is a tool, not a mask—it’s always used with purpose.

One character that comes to mind for inspo is Tom Riddle. I wrote a Tom Riddle fanfic series for like 2 years and crafting scenes where everyone thinks he's perfect while internally he's looking down on all of them was so so fun! Some personal tips from that experience:

Have someone who knows the truth! The one person who doesn't fall for his charm no matter what he tries, make his eye twitch and smile strain as he tries to maintain the farce of perfection whenever this person calls him out in public.

Internal monologue. It's important to make sure your readers get that this guy doesn't actually like the random girl he flirted with to get access to the professor's records. Or that the group of friends that constantly swarm him are really just nuisances in his eyes.

Make things easy, but not too easy. Have people who easily fall for the physical charm, and others whose trust he gains by making them let their guard down. The sceptic trusts him because he's apparently part of the same tiny dog club as them, the girl who falls for no one feels her heart flutter by how 'real and kind' he was during the moment they 'accidentally' met outside school.

I hope this helps!