Btw If You Ever Make Anything For Me EVER Ill Literally Go Crazy Stupid. Like Ill Go Insane . Il Love

The fattest kitten at work hates humans SO MUCH. He doesn’t want to get picked up, he doesn’t want a cuddle. we’re all like, you should have thought about that before you decided to be the fattest little baby in existence. You think we’re not going to pick you up? You think we’re not going to kiss you? You’re so fat

hop tuah. would a bunny say. is what a . a bunny would say hop tuah

context: i was just born today and im trying to learn about the world i hope you can help me. whatever you say i will take to heart completely and live by for the rest of my life

thank you for voting

another song i like started playing in the playlist i created titled “favorite songs”

this is a drawing about how i love my cat

if my doctors name was house i would wanna know his first name before he does any surgery on me. what if its haunted

ill spend my twenties investigating the healing properties of salt i dont know about you guys

just passed a church that had a harley quinn hentai tapestry in one of the windows

So I had a hysterectomy today (hooray!) and I brought along my stuffed orca, Shamu, as a comfort object. And everyone i interacted with during my pre-op was like "Oh! Who's this?" so I was telling them all about him, how he's been with me since I was 9 and gone on every single vacation and road trip, and they were telling me about their own stuffed buddies (one lady said she still has hers after 40 years!) and all of this while I was signing consent forms and providing a list of the things I'd brought with me, you know, small talk.

So then a nurse comes over and goes "Okay, I've got some stickers I'll put on your things so we know they're yours" and I'm like "OK cool" so she puts a sticker on my coat and stickers on my bags of clothes and then she turns to Shamu and I'm like "oh I guess he gets a sticker too"

But no. She pulls out a hospital bracelet that's an exact copy of mine and slaps it on his tail, like so:

And i was delighted by this, so I took a picture to send to my friends, who were equally delighted, and were cracking me up with their reactions (like so:)

Anyway, they take me back and put me under, and when I awake groggily a few hours later it takes me a minute to get my bearings, so I don't notice Shamu at first. But then I realize he's tucked up next to me in the gurney, so I grab him, and my hand touches gauze.

And I'm like "huh?" so I look at him and I realize

They gave my fucking orca a hysterectomy