Majexs03 - Aprilph

Keep trying things. You’ll know what “works” because it will just come together seamlessly.

“You often feel tired, not because you’ve done too much, but because you’ve done too little of what sparks a light in you.”

— Unknown

4 Types of guys I will not date:

1. Guys who are in love with love They are obsessed with the feeling of being in love than the person they're with. They chase the honeymoon phase, the high of attention and connection but when the relationship becomes real they check out. It's not about you, it's about their addiction to fantasy and when they are done with you, they will jump to someone else

2. Guys who want a wife This sounds good on paper until you realize they don’t care who the wife is. They’re in a rush to plug someone into a role, not build a life with a specific person. These guys want the optics of commitment without the emotional maturity or compatibility required to sustain one. A man who wants to get married < a man who wants to marry you

3. Guys who want kids These guys aren't necessarily looking for a deep connection with a partner—they just want the title of "parent" or the idealistic perception, not really about being a father. It’s more about the next step in their life plan than the emotional bond that should come with it. A man who wants to be a father > a man who wants kids

4. Guys who don’t love themselves, so they’re looking for love outside of themselves These people are searching for validation, comfort, security from others because they haven't learned to give those things to themselves first. They look for relationships to fill the emptiness or fix their own internal struggles. Without self love, any love they find is only a temporary fix

—

After writing this, I realized that these are typically all the same type of guy. Also this should have been gender neutral cause it applies to everyone

favorite books on herbal beauty?

What I’m not about to do is shrink myself just to make others comfortable. I’ve done that before, especially in dating and social situations—toning myself down to seem more easygoing or likable. But the truth is, I carry myself with confidence, and that’s not something I’m willing to suppress just to fit into spaces that were never meant for me. It’s not my job to ease other people’s insecurities by pretending to be someone I’m not.

When you’re feeling lonely, it’s easy to fall into that trap because the need for connection can be strong. But when you know who you are and stand firmly in it, your perspective changes. You stop worrying about whether people like you and start asking if you actually like them. The right people won’t be put off by your presence. They’ll appreciate it, respect it, and be drawn to the very things that set you apart.

#Beautytips #perfume

How do I smell nice all the time?

I am pretty sure the best compliment (okay, if not the top 5 best compliments ever) is something along the lines of ‘you smell so nice’. It inflates my ego just right and I get giddy with happiness. Smelling nice isn’t just about wearing perfume. No, it starts at the shower and ends at after when you spray your perfume. The most important key to smelling good is scent layering. Scent layering is the art of wearing different scents at any one time and it can be traced back to the Middle East. Scent layering either really intensifies the one group of fragrance you are wearing or it helps you create your own bespoke signature scent.

Scent layering starts in the shower. Its actually very simple, if you want to smell very Vanilla- use vanilla scented products, if you want to smell like flowers, use floral shower gels and lotions, if you want to smell like musk… use musk scented shower products. Old rich people love the dove unscented bar and so do I. If you don’t know in the shower what you want to smell like, use a neutral smelling soap. It truly is the best bar of soap because it doesn’t leave an overpowring smell after using it. For your vulva, water is enough. Mild soap if you want to ‘really’ clean the area but stick to the outer labia and don’t put it in you. I use the dove bar after I have been to gym or during my period and I use just water to really clean between the folds. Also change your underwear everyday please. I like to store my underwear with some scented wax tablets or scented sachets. I like to put them in all of my drawers just so my underwears and socks can smell nice.

For everyday shower, I use a loofah, silicone body brush and a muslin cloth to clean my body but every third day I go in with a coarse mitt or a silk glove and exfoiliate my skin that way.  I spend a good minute cleaning both my armpits.  Thats the only place I really sweat so I need that place to be squeaky clean with no odour. I cannot have hair there either because I hate the way armpit hair traps body odour so I wax them every-week. My favourite deodorant is the Salt of the Earth, which hands down is the beat deodorant. I don’t know what they put in it but it is magical. It works against the worst of BO; I know someone whose sweat was very unpleasant and after I have gifted one to her, both of us have been very happy. I have all the spray versions and I rotate through each one depending on what I want to smell like that day. I have a whole foot care routine which I will talk about at some other point but for foot odour, I reccomend  wearing different pairs of clean socks everyday (you should not be sharing shoes and socks). I use the same Salt of Earth deodrant on my feet and if I am going to gym then I use foot powder as well. After I come home, I like spray the insides of my shoes with a shoe deodourizer and then go wash my feet in the shower.

Carrying on, scent layering phase 2 is lotions and oils. The same rule applies, stick to the same smell group. After you start getting the hang of how perfume and smell works you can start mixing different scented lotions and perfume but until then just stick to the basic groups. I use my body serums, lotions, moisturisers and on top of all that I put my scented moisturiser on. This way I can use my body products that help with KP and dryness and still smell nice. Perfumes and especially perfume oils stay on better on moisturised skin as the oils lock onto your skin better so always make sure you put some lotion on before you spray your perfume. I also mix traditional perfume oils that I have collected from all over the Arab world to South Asia into my lotions if I am going for a more traditional smell that day.

Tip🪄: Perfume brands will actually sell scented body lotions, shower gels and even hair mists in their popular acents. The body lotions are usually much cheaper and you can totally buy just that and still smell amazing for the fraction of the cost. They are also great for people who find perfumes in general to be a but too much but still want to smell like something. For my fave perfumes I buy the entire set so I smell like my fave perfume.

Spraying the perfume is phase 3. I use perfume before I put my clothes on. There is a lot of debate on how many sprays and how many whatnots but my rule is maximum one spritz on each and every pulse point and one cloud one. As much as I love perfume I dont like being choked by it. So I am always mindful about how many sprays because your perfume should be lingering and alluring not cloaking and invasive to people’s repository system. I will do one final spritz on my hair (using a hair mist) and that is me done. 

Your home smell is very important as well. You yourself are nose blind to it, but you do smell like your house and that can affect how others view you. What you cook, how you store your clothes, how stagnant the air is in your home, it all adds up. As a South Asian, the smell of my food ending up in my clothes is inevitable. To tackle this, I am strict at having different pairs of home clothes and going out clothes. As soon as I come in, I change into loungewear and spritz my clothes with a deodourizer and fabric freshner and put them away. When I cook I am mindful to open the ventilations, open the windows and keep the doors to my closet and rooms shut and I always wear an aporn.

I like everything to smell nice and that includes my home. I light various Thai/Japanese/Tibetan incense which makes my place smell like a monastery and some bakhoor to add sultry oriental feel. My old Sudanese friend taught me how to smoke my clothes with incense and I do that a lot too. I find it imperative to have mini dehumidifiers in the corners of my shelves and closet and these hanging ones on my clothing rails and in my drawers I have these tiny ones. They are great for humid enviroments and stop mold and mildew forming on the clothes.

Daphne xoxo