Y'know The Thing Where Different Kryptonite Colors Mess With Superman In Various Ways? How Might That

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Phantom in the Mirror updates every Monday and Friday.  

Note: No pairing tags, please!

Subtle as a brick

Rey stepped back a little, reverently, as Jedi Master Luke took the lightsaber.

His lightsaber. It had been his father’s, then his, and now it was his again. And-

-he threw it away.

Rey just sort of stared for a moment.

Master Luke may have said something. He may not. Rey simply didn’t process a thing for at least ten seconds.

“...what was that for?” she demanded.

“Did you think I’d come out here into hiding because I didn’t have a lightsaber?” Luke asked, looking at her like she was a bit odd.

“But – I brought your lightsaber back,” Rey objected, not really sure how to handle this complete inversion of her expectations.

Luke shrugged. “It’s not mine, anyway,” he said. “It’s my father’s. I have a strong attachment to my lightsaber, which I built by myself, while brooding alone on a desert planet.”

“Like Jakku?” Rey asked.

“...I guess, yeah, like Jakku,” Luke allowed. “Weird one to bring up, though. Why Jakku?”

“I grew up there,” Rey explained. “With no idea who my parents were… all I really had were stories and the knowledge that I wanted to leave Jakku as soon as possible.”

Luke didn’t reply, favouring her with a strange look.

“I suppose I did learn some technical skills, at least,” she went on. “Then I had to help a droid get to safety with plans the First Order wanted, plans vital to the survival of the Resistance.”

Luke looked like he was going to say something, but refrained.

“You remember the Millennium Falcon?” Rey asked. “My friend and I had to flee the planet in it, just ahead of First Order fighters and starships… then one thing led to another and I had to help in destroying the most vulnerable point on a First Order superweapon. And I’m trying to deal with my connection to the Force.”

“I know the feeling,” Luke muttered, almost too quiet to hear.

Rey frowned slightly. “And… I don’t know what it is, but I have this weird feeling that I might be related to a really evil Sith somehow-”

“Okay, okay, I get it!” Luke shouted.

“...sorry?” Rey apologized, nervously.

“Not you,” Luke assured her. “I was speaking to the Force. I get it, you don’t need to be this blatant.”

He reached out his hand, catching the blue saber as it flew back up the slope, then tossed it underhand through the air to Rey.

She caught it, automatically, and Luke examined her with a critical eye.

“All right,” he said. “So, let’s see… have you got any friends in imminent trouble? Recent escape from a Resistance base?”

“Not yet, when I left, but the evacuation was going to have to be soon,” Rey answered. “I assume they’ve already done it… I hope they’ve got away safely.”

“Yeah, probably hasn’t happened,” Luke said. “They’re in trouble somehow. Could be they escaped to somewhere the First Order is already waiting, could be that they’re being chased directly… could be they’re in trouble to lure you into a trap.”

He shot her a grin, and it transformed his whole face, all his body language.

“The Force is not being subtle,” he said. “So I’m not going to be subtle back. What’s your name, anyway?”

“Rey,” Rey introduced herself.

“Well, Rey,” Luke said, lacing his hands together. “I’m going to make you into a Jedi. And then we are going to redeem the kark out of whoever your Sith ancestor is.”

Three very eventful weeks later, Sheev Palpatine existed in timeless harmony with the Force.

This was an enormous surprise to him.

“How, exactly, did that happen?” he asked the air, or the world, or the Force itself. “How in the kriff did Skywalker convince me to redeem myself by sacrificing myself to stop myself?”

“Not that I’d have an idea,” Anakin Skywalker said, fading into perception behind him. “But I’d guess it’s something he got from Padme’s side.”

“Oh, shut up,” Palpatine muttered.

He couldn’t even be properly angry any more, though it seemed that redemption did not prevent testiness.

Though meeting Obi-Wan Kenobi would probably have made that clear anyway.

Star Wars AU Masterlist

(The Naruto Masterlist, previous pin)

Under a cut so I can edit as it grows. Since this list got long enough that tumblr started glitching when I tried to add more links, I’ve made other posts as well.

I have hit the maximum link limit… many times over.

Modern, Historic, Crossovers, and Otherwise Not Canonverse

Time Travel AUs: I have enough that they get their own list

Headcanons: Exactly what it says on the tin

Ships Masterlist: ships I do a lot with, not including nsfw

That Which is Unsafe for Work: You know the drill, folks. Tread carefully, for 18+ only.

Shitposts Collective: Shitposts

Wider AUs masterlist: masterpost for the AUs that have more than two parts

In the Big Leagues: for posts about fics that have made it to AO3

Miscellaneous: Star Wars Fic Writing Jokes, Discourse, Rec Lists, and Liveblogs

Meme Fills: What it says on the tin

If a line has an asterisk (*), then it’s been reworked into a proper fic on my AO3.

LAST UPDATED: Jan. 15th, 2023

This is currently separated into:

Random AUs (organized by era)

Modern AUs

Children and related (organized by era)

Weiterlesen

I’ve fallen in love with @t4tmareach‘s AU for Danny Phantom Luigi, you can find the fic here

Just Luigi with ghost powers is too cool

So I had to draw fanart

Also Polterpup is here too because hes a good boy and deserves to be Luigi’s sidekick in spooky heroism

emperor palpatine is so fucking cringe dude he doesn’t even have a court jester

Goa'uld Clones AU

the Kaminoans, upon receiving an order for a massive army, quickly realized that their ability to produce bodies far exceeded their limited ability to train soldiers, even with the hired bounty hunters brought in for the job

so they decided to take a different tactic for fulfilling this order

they would create a more limited number of high-quality, highly-trained symbiotic brain worms, and then mass-produce interchangeable empty human bodies, grown at more than 10x normal speed to adulthood, for those worms to inhabit and control

this way, if a host body got hurt, it would be simple to switch the symbiote into a new one so their investment in that highly trained soldier wouldn't be lost

the host body could even be killed, and the symbiote conveniently retrieved if it exited in time and concealed within the fallen body's helmet for ease of return to their flagship or Kamino for a new empty host, and it only takes a week of training to adjust to the new body, rather than the months for treatment and physical therapy, or Force forbid the years to grow and train a whole new soldier from scratch!

this is of course not what the Jedi ordered, so they cannot be aware of this change in plans; the main contact, however, is informed, as it impacts their contingency plans with the control chips

but since the Jedi cannot find out about this, troopers who don't interact too closely with Jedi are not permitted to personalize their host body's appearance or armor to allow for easy replacement

the commanders and other troopers who do get to personalize themselves because of their close relationship with a Jedi treat that as a badge of honor and work harder than normal to keep their host body alive and intact, because if they have to switch bodies they also have to be transferred to a new battalion as a new shiny, as far from the Jedi who might notice the change as possible

Order 66, however, comes with an especially nasty twist: the clone commander is ordered to fake some sort of health issue requiring resuscitation from their Jedi, and uses that proximity to jump through the mouth to assume control of their traitorous commanding officer's body

which places the new Emperor in charge of the army and the bodies of the Jedi, including use of their powers and knowledge to support his regime change

mr L is the equivalent to the dance scene from spiderman 3 and we should start treating him as such

-don’t tag as ship-

I have a vision.

Okay, so, we all love Star Wars time travel fics. They're great, and I've read like, 50 of them in two days.

So. Obi-Wan travels to the future. From the Clone Wars to, oh, 10 years into the Empire era. Directly to Mustafar. Directly to Darth Vader's private chambers. Right in front of Darth Vader, who is currently helplessly floating in a bacta tank.

And the first thing he says is "oh Force, Anakin! What happened to you?"

And the first thing Darth Vader says is "You did this."

From Obi-Wan's perspective... well. Obi-Wan can feel it in the Force that the Jedi are gone. Anakin is grievously injured in every way possible, and he's telling the truth that Obi-Wan was responsible. They are on a remote planet, on which Anakin is obviously hiding.

Obi-Wan puts two and two together and gets twenty-two.

"I Fell. Didn't I, Anakin? I did this. All of this."

Obi-Wan explains away Anakin's obvious Darkness as a result of the trauma of watching his Master, brother and best friend become a Sith Lord. And, because Obi-Wan is duty-driven, selfless and above all a man who loves punishing himself, he immediately agrees to help Anakin hunt down his older self. Actually, he suggests it.

Darth Vader is caught in a conundrum. On one hand, he hates Kenobi almost as much as he hates himself. On the other hand, Kenobi is willingly admitting that this was all his fault and not Vader's (which is what Vader already believes anyways, and it's nice to have validation even if Obi-Wan is, technically speaking, wrong), and if he can just keep Young Obi-Wan on his side, he could overthrow Sidious...

Hilarity ensues. Vader tries to keep Obi-Wan from finding out the real truth while desperately lying to himself and Obi-Wan, and Obi-Wan is too caught up with blaming himself to actually look at the situation they're in, and, of course, if Vader just managed to be honest with Obi-Wan and Obi-Wan was able to return to his time, this whole mess could be averted.

"You're telling me you haven't tried to mass hypnotize your audience even Once?!"

LEGO STAR WARS:  THE SKYWALKER SAGA

#ANAKIN NO