Monokikkeli-blog - Lazy Perv

The signs as things my dad has said to me

Aries: “Tell the cops to wait, I’m playing Call of Duty.”

Taurus: “Fuck it, I’m going to Canada.”

Gemini: “COME HOME THIS INSTANT I ACCIDENTALLY MADE 144 COOKIES.”

Cancer:  (playing cod) “I can’t hear you over the sound of me kicking all these twelve-year-olds’ asses.”

Leo: (pointing to a bruise on my hand) “Is that a hickey?”

Virgo:  “Don’t tell your mom, but I’m happy for the gays.”

Libra: “Sad movies are dumb.  I don’t want to pay ten dollars to cry for two hours.  I do that every day for free.”

Scorpio: “I want the board to change my job title from CEO to supreme leader.”

Saggitarius: “The only reason I have a facebook is to embarass your mom.”

Capricorn: “I have a crush on Eric Dane.”

Aquarius: “I’m hiding from your mother because I just told her to fight me and I’m scared she’ll win.”

Pisces: “When I die, make sure I get a viking funeral.  If I’m getting cremated, I’m getting cremated like a badass.”

Family and Friends: “What could be better than having kids?!”

Me:

PuPPIESSSS

http://iglovequotes.net/

drag him dj

Were you expecting an inspiring comic about body positivity or something? Sorry, this is just about how cool pansexuality is You can’t expect me to draw 2 serious comics in a row, now, can you?

Civil War spoiler. spiderman vs antman.

‘Tsundoku: a pile of books waiting to be read’ #books #bookstagram #reading #words

I’m that type of friend you can tell anything to but I won’t know how to respond and will probably just pat you on the head

proof i am a grandpa

- hates kids - full of useless information - everything hurts - ready for death

This is one more piece of advice I have for you: don’t get impatient. Even if things are so tangled up you can’t do anything, don’t get desperate or blow a fuse and start yanking on one particular thread before it’s ready to come undone. You have to realize it’s going to be a long process and that you’ll work on things slowly, one at a time.

Haruki Murakami (via quotemadness)