Tomorrow I'll Have To Leave My Home Because Of Russians. Again.

INKTOBER

Day 3: Boots.

Day 4: Exotic.

hey y’all, if you’re looking to do something to support palestinians as the current conflict breaks out, and if you can, please donate to any of the orgs linked here:

BuildPalestine - A global community for social impact in Palestine

Trusted organizations to donate to Palestine - BuildPalestine

We’re overwhelmed with all the messages of solidarity and support we’ve been receiving from friends all over the world. Several of you reach

With the liberation of Palestine, every other group oppressed and suffering from genocide will be free as well. Recognize the genocides and look for freedom.

Free Armenia (genocides perpetrated by the Ottomans and the current occupation of Nagorno-Karabakh)

Free Sudan (mass rapes and murders are occurring there by the hand of the RSF. Sudan has the biggest displacement crisis in the world with +9 million people displaced)

Free Western Sahara (abandoned by the Spanish State in 1975, who is responsible for the celebration of the referendum of independence that has been frozen for over 50 years, currently occupied by the Alawite government of Morocco)

Free Congo (children forced to extract metals used for electronic devices in terrible conditions alongside mass displacement and violence. (DON´T BUY NEW PHONES YOURS IS FINE. QUIT VAPING AND IF YOU CAN´T, REUSE THEM)

Free the American Natives (Landback!!)

Free Ukraine (Holomodor and Russian aggression)

Uyghur genocide (People´s Republic of China sending native inhabitants to concentration camps and re-education camps)

This is by no means a comprehensive list, please add more to this in the reblogs.

CONDEMN THE STATES AND COLONIES OF FRANCE, THE USA, UK, GERMANY, SPAIN, JAPAN AND RUSSIA FOR THEIR CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY. DEMAND RESPONSIBILITY AND ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF GENOCIDES.

so so fucked up how Ukrainians in online spaces are like "I don't want to see anything or anyone ruzzian on my dash ever again, no matter their views" and some foreigners go "oh, you're so racist for this, you can't bring tumblr blogs into this" or "it's just pictures of moscow why are you blocking them for this jesus" or smth like that, and it's like. fellas is it "overreacting" when people don't want to see or hear anything related to a nation who oppressed them for centuries including at least two genocides with one of them going on right now, is it "overreacting" when people want to see literally any other country except the one that is killing Ukrainians every goddamn day. bro imagine living in a country that's not being invaded and arguing with someone who's currently sitting in a bombshelter hiding from ruzzian rockets second time this week about how they shouldn't bring posts about dostoyevsky into this.

INKTOBER

Day 17: Journal.

Day 18: Drive.

When I see some foreigners wholeheartedly say that Ukrainians shouldn't judge all russians by the actions of the russian army, I think they miss a couple of points.

Firstly, Western belief that there is good in every person leads to self-deception and naivety. Many people still want to believe that russian society isn't different from the ones they live in. "Well, of course they are just like us. Look at their cities, at their youth, look at the things their activists write and say. Army gets the orders from the government, that's it. Ordinary people are against this war" Well, I don't know about you, but in my country army IS a part of the society. In fact, it's a scaled down version of the society. Soldiers aren't grown in laboratories where they gain their own, separate mentality.

Of course, if you are lucky/unlucky enough to speak russian, you know that the image and the essence of the russian mentality are two different things. russians are extremely good at creating an attractive and somewhat alluring image of their country for those who don't go in too deep. People who still try to judge russians from their own, West-oriented perspective, make a huge mistake. They conclude that the ordinary russians strive to the same values and civilizational goals as a common folk from, let's say, Berlin or Copenhagen.

The second thing has to do with us, Ukrainians. For us it's not the time for the shades of gray. To survive and to gain the victory, we need to look at the enemy through a white and black lense. Here are us and there are them. If we start pondering which russian is better and which is worse, we risk to lose everything. Every living russian at this given moment is an enemy - either a current or a potential one. Those russians who were kids at the beginning of the war in 2014, grew up and came to kill us in 2022. So we don't have the privilidge of going through all of the life details of those russians who beat themselves in the chest and proclaim they are good. Besides, in most cases after a few crucial questions 'good' russians turn into the ordinary ones. And thus we return to the first point once again - it's improtant to understand that russians are extremely good at hiding their ugly core from those who don't study the topic deep enough.

My two years today

Two years ago I was in Ukraine with my family. We will never gather at the same table as before. I have no opportunity to come home, my grandmother died, several acquaintances are missing, my cat also died without veterinary care. The city is empty, my younger sister goes to school under occupation, where she is forced to draw thank you cards for russian soldiers and the teachers mock her for her Ukrainian accent. She constantly cries and asks me to pick her up, but I don’t know what to say. My mother had a stroke, but she was not admitted to the hospital during the occupation because she did not have a Russian passport, and they did not manage to help her in time. Parts of her brain are permanently disabled, and she barely recognizes me or moves. I'm glad she's alive, but I no longer have support in my mother, this happened too soon.

Abroad, I was once attacked by russian emigrants in Lithuania. They saw my passport when I was buying tickets, and then they followed me and started pushing me and calling me a Nazi. A taxi driver helped me and took me away from there. The last time I was in Ukraine, a rocket fell near the house where I was visiting. Neither I nor anyone in the house was surprised or frightened, it was just the deep despair of millions of people from hopelessness.

I don’t remember well half a year during the occupation, but I remember how we made a fire to cook food, that there was no water, buses with loudspeakers drove through the streets, calling for surrender. How they came and took our medicines from our houses. How we went to rallies and had grenades thrown at us. I saw two huge piles rising above the ground - with the remains of cars and, apparently, with the remains of bodies and everything else. This picture is very unclear, I almost threw up, and after a couple of minutes a russian military man came up to me and asked if I loved russia. I answered "yes". What else could I say?

Now I am undergoing treatment from a psychiatrist and am trying to work to donate to those in need. Every day there are only more and more and more of them... those who have lost their home, limbs or loved ones. It pains me to see requests for help with funerals.

I feel nothing today except emptiness