nekomuse

Latest Posts by nekomuse

I love how this implies that the Wayne family decided to hire mainly/exclusively male caregivers for their family and learned nothing in those 500 years of Danny snatching men.

As well as implying that Martha and Thomas Wayne planned a 10-year-plan for Alfred, told that plan to Bruce and then send their son out to stop Danny from snatching another man. That was their masterplan, let their child warn the man.

Thomas and Martha probably sighed resigned after Bruce told them how that ended.

8 year old Bruce: Alfred, can I tell you the story of the Wayne Blood Curse?

Alfred: No. That's how curses get spread. I don't want a blood curse on my house.

Bruce: But its really important I tell all new staff members or they are open to-

Alfred: No. Shush.

Bruce: But-

Alfred: I have dusting to do. Good day, Young Master.

Danny dusting in the room Alfred ran into: Hiya, you new?

Alfred: Yes. Just started last week. Are you a butler, too?

Danny: Not really, I'm more of a floater. I cover whatever work needs to be done if we're short staff. I'm Danny Phantom, by the way. Nice to meet you. You are?

Alfred: It's lovely to meet you, I'm Alfred Pennyworth. I-

Bruce: ALFRED NO! YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TOLD IT YOUR NAME! WHY DIDN'T YOU LISTEN TO ME!?

Alfred: What?

Danny suddenly glowing and flouting: HeLlO ALfrEd PeNNyWoRtH. ThE conTrACt hAs bEeN SeALeD.

Bruce: No!

Danny: Yes!

Bruce: NO!

Danny: YES!

Bruce: Alfred belongs to my parents! Its why Dad hired him- he's supposed to be my other Dad after a ten year plan of them romancing him!

Danny: Its too late. He's mine now. I have the soul binding ring! SEE! *Waves hand* I'M THE HUSBAND AND THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT CHILD, MAH HA HA HA!

Bruce: Nooooooooooo!

Alfred frog blink: Whats happening?

Bruce: That's man-stealing ghost took another one! Why is he always after the men, we Waynes want!? Its been 500 years Phantom, leave us alone!

Danny: Ha! You sound just like your father did at your age when I seduced his nanny.

Bruce: I shall have my revenge!

Danny: He said that too!

Alfred: Can someone please explain what the hell is going on!?

Bump-Ins

Made a little comic, my first one. Anyways- Sorry for not posting a lot, work and kids got in the way. And sorry for not really coloring it, didn’t have much time to work on it. But I hope my gang has a happy happy day.

Johnny Johnny, out.

DP X Marvel #24

When Danny Fenton got into MIT, he thought the biggest challenge would be balancing ghost hunting with college coursework. What he didn’t expect was to impress Dr. Jane Freaking Foster—renowned astrophysicist, literal genius, the mind behind the Foster Theory, and, unbeknownst to her, his idol since age thirteen—during a campus science expo when he presented his thesis on interdimensional ectoplasmic lattice fluctuations as a potential fuel source for wormhole stabilization. He thought she’d walk by his booth with a polite smile. Instead, she paused, squinted at his equations, asked three rapid-fire questions, then turned to the MIT faculty and said, “Is this kid legally allowed to work in a government lab yet?”

That’s how he became her apprentice.

Danny thought it would be, you know, an internship. Fetch coffee, carry papers, maybe input data if he got lucky. What he didn’t expect was to be living in New Mexico three months later, standing on a roof beside Jane Foster while she casually pointed at the sky and said, “If this gravitational anomaly maintains its trajectory, we’ll have a Yggdrasil branch brush up against the heliopause by Tuesday. That’s new.”

Danny nodded, mostly pretending he understood.

What neither of them anticipated was Thor crashing into their lives again like a golden retriever with a god complex and a hammer. He landed dramatically during a research presentation, lightning still fizzing off his cape, and made such eye contact with Jane that the projector screen behind them shorted out.

And then he saw Danny.

“Young one!” Thor bellowed, eyes wide, blond hair tousled by divine winds, “You must be her son.”

Danny blinked. “I—what?”

“Of course!” Thor clasped his shoulder. “You have her radiant intellect and tenacity. Truly, you are worthy of Midgard’s finest mother.”

“I—she’s not—” Danny tried.

Thor turned to Jane, face alight. “You did not tell me you had borne a child! And one so strong in spirit! A scholar of the stars!”

Jane rubbed her temples. “Thor. He’s nineteen. I met him last month. He’s my apprentice. He is not my son.”

Thor shook his head gravely. “Say no more, Jane. I understand. You wished to protect him from the dangers of our past. But I vow upon Mjolnir’s handle, I shall be a father to him.”

“What the hell,” Danny muttered.

Over the next few days, things escalated fast.

Danny woke up one morning to find a goat outside the lab. A live goat. Wearing a ribbon. The tag read: For my brave son, may his mornings be strong of milk and noble of beard. Jane nearly choked on her cereal. Darcy screamed and immediately named the goat “Spacey.”

Thor showed up during Danny’s lecture on cosmic radiation and brought a sack of Asgardian textbooks written in glowing runes, which promptly caused two lab interns to faint and one professor to file a complaint.

Danny begged Jane to tell him this would stop.

“No,” Jane said, sipping her coffee without looking up. “You’re his emotional support stepson now.”

“I don’t want to be anyone’s emotional support anything!” Danny cried. “I have ectoplasmic trauma and insomnia!”

But Thor persisted.

He invited Danny to spar in the desert, claiming it would “toughen his warrior instincts.” Danny blasted a crater in the sand when a ghost startled him mid-match, and Thor wept with pride. “Such fire! Truly, a son worthy of thunder.”

Jane sighed. “You’re going to give him a complex.”

“I already have a complex!” Danny yelled from where he was half-buried in sand.

Then came the night Thor pulled Danny aside with intense solemnity.

“Daniel,” he said, kneeling, “I seek your blessing.”

Danny froze, halfway through a sandwich. “I—what—blessing for what?”

“To court your mother.”

“She’s NOT my—!”

Thor raised a hand. “Please. I know you wish to protect her. But my heart is true. I have spent long hours learning Midgardian courtship. Observe.”

He pulled out a guitar. A guitar. From nowhere. And began strumming aggressively while singing off-key.

“Oh Jane, fairest in the stars, your eyes burn like a neutron quasaaaaaar—”

Danny screamed into his sandwich.

Jane screamed into her coffee.

Darcy recorded the entire thing.

By the time the Avengers got wind of what was happening, it was too late. Tony Stark showed up purely out of pettiness.

“So this is the ‘son,’ huh?” he said, looking Danny up and down like he was a new model of iPhone. “You do look like Jane. Same ‘don’t talk to me before coffee’ vibe. But with a sprinkle of sleep-deprived raccoon.”

Danny glared. “You must be the one Jane threatens to launch into orbit when she’s annoyed.”

“See? Family resemblance,” Tony muttered.

Then Steve Rogers took Thor aside and whispered, “Are you sure he’s her kid? Jane would’ve told us if she had a child.”

Thor nodded gravely. “It is the only explanation. He speaks with passion, has knowledge of the stars, and I saw him summon green fire from his hands!”

“It was a ghost, Thor,” Danny shouted from across the lab. “It was literally a ghost trying to possess a vending machine!”

“Exactly!” Thor beamed.

“Thor. I’m nineteen. Jane is thirty-seven.”

“She is a goddess among mortals. Perhaps she birthed you when she was five.”

“That’s not how—YOU KNOW WHAT, NEVER MIND.”

Soon, even Loki showed up, slinking into the lab with a smirk like a serpent in silk.

“I had to see for myself,” he purred, circling Danny like a shark. “The mortal child who ensnared my brother’s affections.”

Danny just blinked. “I’m not his kid. Or Jane’s. I’m not even sure I’m awake right now.”

Loki chuckled. “You’ll make an excellent prince. Do you have any interest in necromancy?”

“I’m a ghost half the time,” Danny deadpanned. “Define interest.”

Loki grinned wider.

Eventually, S.H.I.E.L.D. got involved. Fury showed up, took one look at the scene—the goat eating research notes, Thor trying to build Danny a golden throne, Jane yelling about radiation levels, and Danny levitating out of sheer stress—and muttered, “Nope,” before turning around and leaving.

But beneath all the chaos, Danny… didn’t hate it.

Jane never treated him like a kid. She taught him everything, from solar flares to Bifrost trajectories. She let him make mistakes, then helped him fix them. She told him he was brilliant, and for once, he kind of believed it. And Thor, for all his thunderous confusion, brought him starfruit from Alfheim and carved him a wooden Mjolnir as a “coming-of-age” gift.

Danny didn’t even mind the goat anymore.

He still insisted, every day, that Jane was not his mom.

But when Thor presented him with a massive, hand-forged broadsword inscribed with: To my noble son, may your ghosts be vanquished and your GPA ever high, he kind of teared up.

A little.

One evening, as they watched the stars from the roof, Jane handed Danny a cup of tea.

“He really does think you’re my kid,” she said.

Danny took a sip. “Yeah. I gave up trying to convince him.”

“Is it weird?”

“Kinda. But… not bad.” He hesitated. “Do you… mind?”

Jane looked at him, surprised. “No. I mean—you’re not. But if you were, I’d be proud.”

Danny stared at the stars until they blurred.

Later, Thor appeared beside them, cape fluttering dramatically despite the lack of wind.

“I have returned with tales of valor,” he declared, “and also cheesecake.”

Danny took the box.

“Son!” Thor beamed.

Danny sighed.

“Fine. You can have my blessing.”

Thor dropped Mjolnir in joy.

Jane looked horrified. “Danny, what the hell?!”

“I didn’t say I wanted it to happen,” Danny muttered. “I just figured he’d stop bringing me swords if I gave in.”

“He won’t,” she said flatly.

He didn’t.

The next morning, Danny woke up to find a full set of Asgardian armor beside his bed and a note that read: For my beloved heir. P.S. I have begun planning the wedding. Do you think your mother would prefer swans or flaming eels as decoration?

He screamed into his pillow.

The goat screamed with him.

a phone danny while i’m on the road

Bruce, introducing his kids at a family Interview: This is my eldest Dick, my second eldest Cassandra, then my son Jason, my second youngest Tim, and my youngest Damian

Bruce: That's my daughter-in-law Barbara, and my other daughter-in-law, Stephanie

Tim: ??? Steph and I broke up forever ago?? How is she your daughter-in-Law?

Stephanie: I may not be dating any of you anymore but I'm the State of daughter-in-law. Daughter-in-law is not a family title, it's the friends you make along the way

Jason: I'm not high enough for this shit

Golden boy Dick Grayson: Me fucking neither

Jason: what

Dick: what

Bruce: ??? What do you mean she's not my daughter-in-law anymore?? I was counting on her marrying into the family :C

Steph: Sorry B, unfortunately your son would rather kiss superbitch than me

Dick: TIM IS KISSING WHO NOW

Bruce: >:( We'll talk about that later, right now-

Tim: I don't think that's necess-

Bruce: We'll talk about that later. Right now can't any of you date her?? Jaylad, you're sin-

Steph: HELL NO

Jason, already on his second blunt: You're so funny, old man. I'm literally co parenting my best friends kid. I'm literallyyyy be gay do crime. Haha.

Dick: YOURE WHAT WITH WHO NOW

Bruce: CAN ANY OF YOU JUST DATE HER

Cass, slowly raising her hand like in Hunger Games: I volunteer

Bruce: ...

Tim: ...

Dick: ...

Bruce: This is why you're my favorite daughter 🥹

Cass: Father, I'm your only daughter

Tim: Untrue. I did drag one time, that has to count

Steph: Does this mean I have a girlfriend

Damian: This family is a disgrace

Interviewer: ...

WIP from a DPxDC fic im probably never going to finish, I’ll probably post more art of it but I’m pretty art blocked rn🥲

Something about this ungodly hour has convinced me I can fight god, so art…

Apprentice of the Butler

AKA "Alfred Pennyworth hires an interim butler while he recuperates from a Rogue attack. Who better than adoption bait Danny Fenton?" prompt!!

Okay, so imagine Danny moves to Gotham to pursue astrophysics at Gotham-U but he's having a surprisingly difficult time keeping a job. Every time he gets hired, the place gets burned down or blown up by Rogues; it's like he's catnip for trouble. Somehow, he's always in the wrong place at the wrong time.

And Alfred Pennyworth also happens to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. He's at the Gotham Market Co-op, where Danny's been recently hired, and suddenly it's gassed by Scarecrow's Fear Toxin. All the employees and customers scramble to put on their gas masks, but Danny's new enough that he has no idea what's happening. He's suddenly seeing Fright Knight, Dark Pariah, and the GIW. So, he Goes Ghost, defeats all of Scarecrow's goonies, and saves the day! If only his boss would think so, too.

Uh, no. Apparently Danny's now on a Wanted List as an undocumented meta?? And his boss can't be investigated by the GCPD (he's, like, four years behind on taxes and has been dodging the IRS for longer), so he regretfully has to let Danny go. But, hey! Maybe if he becomes a documented meta, he can get hired back. Except Danny can't because the GIW can access the meta registration database and he'll be found out faster than he can leave Gotham.

So, Danny's fired again.

And Alfred "Pride & Honor" Pennyworth?? He's not gonna let the child who saved him (because Scarecrow absolutely was going to snatch the Wayne's butler, who better to take hostage than a billionaire's publicly beloved Father Figure??) possibly become homeless. It's clear the kid is a college student and is barely scraping by, probably paying way too much for room and board at Gotham-U. And... maybe his wrist hurts a bit from a fall. He's older now, it's not impossible that he'd get a sprain or a broken bone. (Plus, Alfred knows the look. The same one as Dick, Jason, Tim, even Bruce. There's an immense grief in those small shoulders, fear and loneliness.)

Cue Alfred hiring Danny on as an interim butler while he recuperates (oh, he's terribly injured, thank you so much for helping me, my boy-). And Danny can't say no. I mean, this old man got injured during the Rogue attack he was apart of! And he's asking for help! And it's also nice to have some money. And a bed and... oh, God, he's working for a billionaire frootloop. Uh-oh.

(Alfred absolutely doesn't tell Bruce about his new son apprentice. It's worth it to see Bruce's eyes glaze over as sees a black-haired teenager standing in the kitchen with Alfred, then doing a double take when he realizes it isn't Jason. And the others are banned from the kitchen, so who is this child in his house?? It's not Kon or Jon either??)

Meanwhile, Danny is actually having a great time with Mr. Pennyworth!! The older man is kind, soft-spoken, and really knows his stuff. Danny really enjoys learning how to cook, especially because none of the food comes alive to fight him. Eventually the Batfam just become used to seeing Danny in the kitchens, gardens, around the house with Alfred. He's a cute kid, always smiling and talking about his college classes. He has effortless sarcastic banter with both Damian and Jason, bonds with Tim about some kind of difficult mechanical mathematics or something, trades dad jokes with Dick. He even manages to win over Cass, Steph, Duke, and Babs.

The only one Danny doesn't truly seem to like is Bruce Wayne, although he never outright disrespects him, since he pays the bills and Danny's midwestern manners kick in. Bruce is confused and very concerned because why is this kid literally glaring daggers at him all the time?? Is he going to poison Bruce's coffee?? Danny's just trying to figure out if Bruce Wayne is a "collects vintage dentures" or "keeps teenagers locked in his basement" type of billionaire frootloop. (He'd kinda prefer the kidnapping, Danny does not want to go looking for a wine cellar and find an entire basement of old teeth.)

Bonus if Bruce tries to subtly win the boy over and Danny's just like, squinting at him, white-knuckling a frying pan and muttering, "That's exactly what someone who collects teeth would say..."

More Danny Phantom art ig? Idk. Might as well start drawing my DP x DC art at this point

I don't even know exactly how long this takes, but I'm actually pretty proud of the painting

Henchmen for Hire

AKA "Danny is employed as one of the Rogue's henchmen and he's doing so well at being discrete, none of the Bats even know he's committing crime! (They absolutely know.)" prompt idea!!

Y'know what would make this funnier?? Is if Selina Kyle, Catwoman and hoarder of strays, immediately Work Mom'd this kid.

Imagine Danny gets dumped into Gotham by himself. Except there's, like, no ectoplasm - not nearly enough to sustain his Ghost. So, his Ghost form slowly peters out and he's left penniless and powerless on the streets of Gotham. Obviously, the next step would be to find money. But how?? He can't go invisible, intangible, or Full Ghost to help him out here. And there aren't a lot of stand-up places that hire kids younger than 13, so ultimately he's forced to apply for henchmen positions. He doesn't actually find Catwoman's ad. No, she hears through the grapevine that this actual child is applying to be a drug runner for the Penguin or - oh, shit, the Joker??

Absolutely not. Selina is no saint, but she's not going to let another kid be beaten to death by the Joker. Maybe she talks to Harley and finds out where the kid's going, or maybe she just puts in an ad and hires him on the spot. To be honest, she doesn't really expect to particularly like the kid - she'll have him pick up her coffee or something, pay him at the end of the day (standard henchmen pay periods since it's likely they won't live through the end of the week), and clear her conscience.

Except Danny is a little shit.

Danny, for his part, doesn't necessarily want to be a henchman but he figured it'd be more than getting some lady's coffee, right? He imagined an evil man twirling his extra long mustache and smoking a cigar, or mobsters hunched over a gambling table grunting about... playing cards or something, he doesn't know. Instead Danny's told to pick up Catwoman's dry-cleaning. It's almost an insult when he knows she's planning a heist that includes stealing several very expensive items from a museum during an evening showing. Without him, her only henchman!! (So what if he snooped in her office? It's not like it's ghost-proof; she should've expected Bad Behavior from the Very Bad Criminal in her house.)

Selina finds out very quickly that Danny is akin to a rambunctious kitten chewing through her phone charger cable and clawing at her favorite muslin blanket (the one Bruce gifted her from one of their dates). And she's so exasperated that she agrees he can be involved. But only as a distraction and he's told that he needs to scram once the police come because she's not bailing him out of juvie if he gets caught. (She wouldn't, but she could make Bruce do it. Her lover would take one look at Danny's watery doe eyes and cave like he's already experiencing Empty Nest Syndrome.)

So, Catwoman and her littlest henchman plan to rob the Gotham Museum. She buys him a cat-themed facemask (in case things get sticky and he needs a quick anonymous getaway) like ones from Party City, it has little ears poking out from the top and it's adorable. And then it's go time.

Danny's role is to distract the crowd by pretending to be a lost kid and distract Batman if he shows up. Selina will take care of the rest - disarming the alarms, timing the museum workers' shifts, bribing the West Entry security guard, frame-freezing the surveillance cameras, smuggling in the forgery and smuggling out the original, and - well. It'll be nice not to deal with the Big Bat if he shows up, but Selina is used to doing this on her own.

She should've expected that Danny doesn't do what's expected.

Because Danny does his part as the crying, screaming child whose mother is lost amongst the chaos once the museum's power shuts off. He distracts the guards easily. Selina hides away the art, replaces the forgery on the wall, and goes to find her little stray. And Danny is clinging hysterically to The Batman, refusing to be pried off by security guards and museum workers. He's straight up sobbing. Talking about how he loves Batman and Robin, his family is dead, he wants to be Robin, did you know you should be able to see Ursa Major from Gotham but you can't because of the smog, do you think Poison Ivy can just make a lot of trees to unpolluted the air, Nightwing is his favorite superhero, do you think he'll sign an autograph-.

It's astounding how fast that kid can speak while also smearing green snot onto Batman's cape. Danny proves himself to be even more unexpected when he goes off-script, eyeing her and screaming, "Mom!" And Batman's eyes catch hers. Shit. How can she explain a tiny child calling her mother in front of her lover? That'll be an awkward conversation.

Catwoman doesn't take Danny to outings after that. Instead, she has Harley and Ivy take turns "babysitting" (i.e., using Danny as Batfam distractions) while she's at work, kind of like having the fun aunts take you shopping. Danny can do whatever he wants!! With the exception that he needs to be wearing his cat-mask at all times, to properly conceal his identity (neither woman knows he'd already thrown himself at Batman without his mask).

So, while Ivy is destroying a toxic power plant, Danny is stealing Nightwing's escrima sticks, clinging to him, "accidentally" tripping him, doing the Koala-leg thing. He goes all out when Nightwing actually does trip on him - he shrieks that he broke his arm, which forces the vigilante to pay attention to him. Sobs, clings harder, and endures the trip to the hospital on the back of Nightwing's motorcycle with a shit-eating grin.

Harley is beating the hell out of some of Joker's gang. Red Robin is doing surveillance and coordinating with GCPD so they can get the whole circus to Arkham. Except Danny is calling out where Red Robin is hiding with the glittery pink microphone that Harley bought him (originally to sing Doja Cat and Chappell Roan in her car). Joker gang's priority will always be the Batfam because of Joker's obsession with Batman and Danny uses the distraction so Harley can get a couple good swings of her bat in. He cackles maniacally when he hears a muffled, "C'mon, kid!!" from Red Robin.

And the Batkids are just like, Jesus, this kid is literally a nightmare. But they can't do anything! Are they going do arrest a kid? No. Are they going to arrest Batman's lover? No! So, they're stuck dealing with this.... absolute gremlin of a child!!

Danny, of course, is very pleased. The Bats have no idea who he is because of his little cat-mask, he's getting paid literally several grand per week, and Selina - who he's been living with ever since she realized he was homeless - even got him goldfish!

(Bruce is in his office, eyes crinkling in that iconic Dad-Smile, scrolling through candid photos Selina snuck of Danny's chocolate-smeared face while the kid was passed out on her couch. There's a fake ID under the name of Danny Fenton and several pages of foraged school records in a pile on his desk. Bruce eyes his desk drawer where several emergency adoption papers are tucked away.)

God I love unconventional and crack pairings so much 🤣

You know what would be deadass funny. Jack Drake comes back from the dead and in “revenge” adopts either Jason as his kid, or Damian or both and Bruce and him have dad offs to who is a better father to their adopted children. They both fail at fatherhood in their own special ways. Anyway 50k slowburn jack/bruce, the robins all end up traumatized because they did not ask to be pulled into this bullshit.

DPxDC Old Friends

Dick rings the doorbell.

Tim has no idea why they are here. The house his brother is trying to invite himself in looks nice, almost eerily so: walls painted in warm beige, windows so clean they sparkle, a perfectly manicured lawn, and flower beds and bushes without a single bad leaf, neatly cut and shaped to the point where they look like a Pinterest picture. The whole place looks like a photoshopped flyer of American Dream.

Which is exactly why it sets Tim on edge. No one can live their life so perfect.

Maybe it's just his broken arm and concussed head speaking, though. The throbbing pain tends to make him grouchy and distrustful.

Another minute passes in silence.

Dick raises his hand once more, but, just as he is about to press the doorbell again, the door opens. A tall, thin redhead girl with bright freckles sprinkled over her cheeks peeks out, a nice, if slightly awkward smile on her face. Only, as soon as she sees Dick, the smile drops like it was never there, and the girl starts closing the door back, evidently intent on slamming it in their faces.

Dick hastily puts his foot in, preventing it from closing.

"Hey, Jasmine, really sorry to bother-"

"Go to fucking hell," the redhead spits out, looking like she is two seconds away from violence. Tim must say, that reaction actually makes him feel a bit better about the whole situation. Turns out, not everything is picture perfect here, what a relief.

"Who's there?" Comes a voice from somewhere inside the house. Male, from the sound of it, so, maybe a husband?

"No one!" Jasmine yells back, an annoyed hint to her tone.

"Jasmine, please," Dick pleads, not taking his eyes off the girl.

"'No one' like you need the gun, or 'no one' like you need the thermos?" A different, younger voice asks, followed by a loud snort and a bark of a dog.

"My brother is hurt," Dick adds, like it's his last resort of an argument, and Tim huffs, barely holding himself back from elbowing the man in his side. And who's fault is that?..

Yet, that makes the redhead pause. She purses her lips, briefly looks at Tim and the way he's cradling his arm. Then, she sighs, long and exasperated, and lets go of the door, allowing it to open all the way.

"'No one' like I need the medkit," she finally answers to whoever is inside the house, and steps to the side, gesturing for both Dick and Tim to come in. "Comicon alert, everyone, plant your feet on the floor!"

JL, summoned the ghost king for something: Can you help?

Danny, going THROUGH IT and suicidal: No

Danny: *snatches the blood blossoms Constantine was trying to threaten him with and just starts eating them to kill himself*

Constantine, breaking 500 different magic rules to get this kid to stop eating poison: Wait! No! Stop that! The Realms will kill us all if they think we killed you!

Danny, coughing blood: sounds like a you problem

Gotham TikTok

AKA "Danny moves to Gotham and records TikToks with absolutely deranged captions. He films Get Ready with Me in Gotham videos, fit checks, and even A Day in the Life of a Ghost in Gotham! Except everybody is freaking the fuck out in the comments" prompt idea!

No, you don't understand, I'm obsessed. Like, what if Danny's idea of "safe" is just... anything that doesn't actively try to kill him? So Metropolitians, Star City, and Central City citizens are literally biting their nails and sweating bullets every time he posts, because what if he gets merc'd by the "Eight Heads in a Duffel Bag" Red Hood?? And that's one of the nicer villains in Gotham. And Danny's just like wow, this place is niiiiiice, I haven't even been murdered yet!

Maybe Jazz took a 12-year-old Danny to Gotham to escape their parents. Gotham's cheap, dirty, and doesn't ask questions: it's the best place to go to disappear because damn near half the city's population are either super villains, hostages, dead, or vigilantes. She gets a job at an understaffed hospital as a clinical psych intern. She enrolls Danny for online schooling because she's scared a public high school would be too easy for their parents to track.

Which leaves Danny alone for hours. He makes a TikTok account called "Danny Phantom" because, c'mon, he's a kid. And, like most kids, he doesn't really comprehend the idea of a digital footprint or that his account is public, accessible by literally anybody.

He's also a little shit. So, the first TikTok he uploads is of a man getting carjacked, but the caption reads: love to see people helping each other. remember it's always okay to ask for help! it's okay, I don't know how to parallel park, either :)

And you just see this guy in a mask shove a businessman away from his car, gesturing with his gun, before getting into the driver's seat. Except the car is parallel parked so the carjacker just slowly inches back and forth between a Prius and a Honda until he can wedge himself out of the parking space. And then gets stuck in stand-still traffic. The TikTok goes viral. It's talked about on the Gotham news and Gothamites are losing their shit, pointing out the exact moment you can see the carjacker start to soundlessly cuss through the car's windshield or the way the businessman is just... standing on the side of the road, watching with a deadpan look.

Danny doesn't know about it being on the news, but he sees all the comments, likes, reposts, and feels something. He wonders if this is what Ember feels every time people listened to her music. So, he keeps posting. Usually, it's short three-second videos of a hilariously unexpected situation with an even more deranged caption. But then he's accidentally caught in the reflection of a store front while recording and doesn't know, posts it like he always does; only for this TikTok to go viral, too. Because "Danny Phantom" is a child??

He doesn't notice the shift in his comments, but the public opinion quickly changes from wow, Gothamites are just like that huh lol to what the FUCK, kid, get inside!!! anytime he posts.

Except Danny never gets hurt. Even in the most dangerous situations, when you'd think this kid is a goner for sure, he's just happily yapping in the background. He's so different from Gothamites because he lacks that dead-eyed, despair-inducing aura of someone who's lived in a hellmouth their whole lives. (A couple people post that Danny kind of reminds them of Golden Boy Brucie Wayne, all air-headed and unrealistically optimistic, and suddenly there's memes of "what happens when you've never gotten shot in Gotham" or "how i act when Commish Gordie accuses me of shoplifting again" with them side-by-side.)

And then Danny's posts go viral again and again. Danny doing a fit check with a blond-haired woman with a checkered outfit, she ruffles his hair and kisses him on the cheek. A picture of him wearing an old jean jacket with a bright red lipstick smear on his cheek is trending for weeks. Spoiler, fully suited up in an all-purple vigilante attire, and him shoving gas station hotdogs in their mouths. He even has videos of him clearly in Killer Croc's lair, with comments of are you in the sewers??? DANNY??? and he responds, no, i'm in mom & dad's basement :) (Waylon Jones is actually sitting behind him in one of the videos, intently watching a TV show on an iPad.)

Everybody adores Danny - Rogues, Gothamites, even the Bats. (There's at least six videos of Nightwing teaching Danny how to do backflips, handstands, and other acrobatic moves. Even the youngest Robin has been caught on camera quietly talking with Danny, a shocking lack of violence that left half the city's population suffering from cuteness aggression for the kids.)

So, yeah, Danny belongs to Gotham.

But the internet is widely accessible and Danny made it so, so easy to find him. Jazz obviously didn't know he was posting videos of himself publicly; she was too tired after back-to-back 12 hour shifts at the hospital that she hadn't even checked social media in months. Otherwise, she would've told him to be careful, to never show his face or post his real name on the internet. Then again, Jazz would never have expected all of Gotham (and Superman himself, totally endeared by the kid after Kon and Jon showed him a couple TikToks) would beat the absolute shit out of anybody going after Danny.

Imagine GIW's surprise when they track down Amity's former residential Ghost only to find an entire city frothing at the mouth to protect their Phantom.

I will read the same trope 20x and more again and again and again, bc I like the trope. I don’t care if it’s been done a 100 times before, it’s still fun to read.

ok, because i just saw a terrible take, i feel compelled to say that there is no "fic market" to "oversaturate" in fandom. good gravy.

Most efficient ER in Gotham

Had the idea of ER nurse Danny and ER doc Damian working in the same ER.

Like their the same age but Danny was working there first (bc it takes less time to become a nurse than a Dr) and everyone in the ER loves him. He is the most component nurse they’ve ever had and is always cool, calm and collected even in the most stressful of times. Drs know that if shit hits the fan they can pass any patient that’s not dying right this second over to Danny and he’ll get them sorted all by himself, cracking jokes the whole time to keep everyone else from freaking out.

Then Damian starts working there and he’s basically a no nonsense Danny. Nothing fazes the guy. On his second day there he handled a gun shoot wound, spinal injury, rib fracture and stabbing all within an hour of starting his shift, all on different patients. He gets in, gets shit done and moves on as if he was dealing with a minor problem not 3rd degree burns.

Now these two, despite working at the same hospital, have never met. Bc Danny works the night shift and Damian works the day and every person that works there is so fucking glad that’s the case bc non of them expect them to get alone. Like Danny’s all wise cracks and jokes and Damian is all ‘stop wasting time’ so even tho they’re both efficient as fuck, no one expects them to tolerate each other.

Then on the first Halloween Damian works there, every member of staff is on shift bc it’s fucking Gotham and all the staff r just bracing for the inevitable fall out of two unstoppable objects colliding. Only it never happens bc these two get alone like a house on fire. Like yeah normally Damian gets up people goofing off but that’s bc their not doing work and just wasting time, he sees nothing wrong with Danny’s jokes bc he’s getting work done while he jokes. It’s like working with Dick, he honestly finds it a bit reassuring bc if Danny is cracking jokes it can’t be that bad. Danny on the other hand is just so glad to have someone else that can keep pace with him. Normally by this time of night he’s juggling 8 to 18 patients on his own with only minimal help from the on shift doctors but now Damian is right there with him and the two r basically tag teaming the hoard of mass casualties that just came in.

Needless to say that night Gotham general was the most efficient hospital on the planet and every doctor and nurse on staff have the horrible realisation that while they had mentally prepared for these two fighting, they hadn’t prepared for the fucking hurricane these two form when they get alone. 

You, every night.

You know how there’s the trope of Tim having to carry Dani/Ellie like a pregnancy until she stabilizes? I want that but with Dick.

Give me screaming, crying, emotional Dick Grayson. He’s pregnant and he’s not afraid to let everybody suffer for him! Emotional control who? He’s pregnant, he doesn’t have to hold anything back.

„Those aren‘t the right chocolates!“

„What do you mean I look fat?! I am carrying a baby! I‘m creating life! You have no idea what it’s like!“

„I hate you! You will never see your grandchild! That’s what you get!“

Give me screaming crash out Grayson, with waterworks and everything. Meanwhile Danny is coming in the few calm moments to look if everything‘s okay, absolutely oblivious to the stress the rest of the family is under.

„What no! I‘m fine, you don’t have to stay, it’s only a few more months. Call me when you get back to your castle? Love you, bye!“

Damian hides in his room bc Dick keeps hugging him and not letting him go, crying about his baby growing up too fast.

Jason came by once to laugh and promptly got forced to cook for Dick, then he had to feel his stomach and listen to Dick tell him how perfect his baby is. All while Damian struggled to get free. They got saved by Tim asking about the babies room in the manor.

Bruce is on such fragile ice right now, he once breathed wrong and got pelted by pillows until he left the room. He is also the first to spend a fortune on baby safety so he could make the manor not blacklisted by Dick for visits.

ao3 turns 15 today

reblog if youre older than ao3

(there's a lot of people asking about this, but the legal age to use social media is 13, except in few countries. so yes, there are people here under 15)

The Island above Gotham

DP x DC Prompt

During one night in Gotham, the Bats and the Rogues of Gotham were going about their business with each other. When a bright green light had flashed above the city. And then a big floating piece of land was above Gotham. It showed no signs of falling down, and yet the Rogues were already heading for the island before the Bats once they learned that it wasn't going to crush them.

The island was the size of Gotham itself, with many strange plant life on it, including animals that Damian had wanted to take home (but couldn't as the animals had tolerated him, but wouldn't follow him home). The most prominent thing on the island was the massive castle in the center of it, with the Rogues of Gotham already entering the structure while the Bats are still on their tail.

The castle would fit in Gotham, with its gloomy appearance and feeling to it, and while it is empty of anyone and anything, it looks like it's been maintained quite well.

The Rogues of Gotham had found a treasure Vault and were grabbing anything that they like or could use, but when they try to leave, a green force field prevents them from leaving the Vault.

Of course, all of the Batfam had an intense fight with the Rogues, and when they sent them all to Arkham, they began to explore the castle on the island some more. They came across a grand chamber, with a sleeping boy in the big bed, who had a familiar face. The boy has the same face as Bruce. Sure, he may have white hair and a skin color the same as Damian, but the features are still the same. And then the Boy wakes up from his slumber and looks at them after he stretched out his back and arms.

Danny was enjoying the peace and quiet he had made for himself. He sent Jazz out on a "me day" out in the Infinite Realms for her to relax a little, same can be said for all the staff that's been in his Keep he inherited from Pariah after he bested the Tyrant.

He just wanted to sleep after getting a little more work done on the piles of paperwork he had to do. He had asked Nocturne to prevent him from dreaming, as they are always bad memories from before he permanently moved to the Infinite Realms (His parents cutting him open. His BEST FRIENDS leaving him in Amity to pursue their own things in life while cutting all ties with him. But Jazz wouldn't leave him alone, not like them. Dani had destabilized in his arms after what Vlad did to her. That was Danny's first and only kill, the Fruitloop deserved it after ending his daughter). He may be the Ghost King, but his human half still has basic needs that need to be met, so after his nap, he'll head to a random world to live in it for awhile then return to his Ghost King duties.

But when he woke up, he had seen unknown people in his room, looking at him like they've seen a ghost (Ha!).

"What are you doing in my bedroom? It's rude to sneak into someone's royal bed chambers"

He deadpanned to the group of costume wearing people.

(A massive natural portal took Danny's keep to the DC verse, and it will stay there for quite a long while.)

I think anyone that studies medicine with Damian would lowkey hate his ass.

Not in a mean way, but in a petty why-aren't-you-struggling-like-me type of way. I mean, thanks to Robin and the league Damian is light years ahead of everyone on terms of experience and it would show.

Half the class is puking their guts out the first time they see a patient with an open fracture. Damian has been there, done that, seen that and worse. He's eating m&m's in the back.

They're all practicing making sutures until late. Damian is like "No, I don't need to join you. I could suture with my eyes closed" and then when someone is like "prove it, rich-boy" that mf actually blindfolds his eyes and sutures perfectly using four different techniques.

He also passes everything with flying colors! Because of course, the guy can't just be rich, good looking and famous, he has to be smart too.

And it just gets worse when he starts his actual residency.

Nothing shakes him! Thirty hour shifts? He doesn't even yawn. Extreme stress during a surgery gone awry? Damian is the one telling the other members of the surgical team to stay calm. Violent patient? They don't even get to call security, Damian has the guy pinned already.

And it would be easier to not get jealous of him if he somehow was a souless blood sucking asshole. But Damian is a good person, awkward and standoffish but always willing to help. He's there for whatever people need. He aids nurses, listens to patients, conforts victims. He sits with people for the bad news and when someone dies he gets this sad faraway look that shows he cares.

And it's just so unfair.

DC x DP Prompt - Cousin John

Sam's parents inform her that her cousin is coming to visit from London. Sam is bracing herself for another uptight rich asshole with more money than sense.

John Constantine is *not* prepared for visiting his father's family in America.

(disclaimer i know NOTHING about John's backstory/family so pls adjust as you see fit)

Bruce, grumbling: Just because you’re right doesn’t mean you have to say it out loud…

i think the rest of the bats probably forget that Tim actually has a full time job. like an important one. they probably text him all the time like ‘wanna help me with this case’ and Tim’s like ‘can’t sorry I’m in Germany for the next 3 days’ and then all the kids are talking for the next week like ‘wow Tim’s probably in some deep shit with this international case he’s working. can’t imagine what he’s dealing with rn’ and then the week after Tim’s at the manor for dinner and Dick’s like ‘so tell us all the gory details of the case in Germany!’ and Tim just looks at him lost.

‘what case’

‘the reason you had to go undercover in Germany and couldn’t join me and Jason’s stakeout!’

‘i never said i was undercover’

‘why the fuck else would you go to Germany?’

‘business convention’

‘…’

‘…i had to give a seminar- you guys know im a CEO right?’

‘well BRUCE never had to travel when HE ran the company-‘

‘BECAUSE BRUCE WAS SHIT AT HIS JOB THATS WHY A SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD HAD TO TAKE OVER’

and Bruce is sat at the end of the table just slightly offended.

"Rejected." "But, Milord, he has been specifically chosen to..." "Rejected. Goodbye."

Wally, tied down to a stone table and about to be sacrificed, feels more than offended.

This particular cult is trying to gift him to some minor god of protection or something, he wasn't particularly paying attention to the specifics, saying that the god needs a new member of his harem.

"But we chose this one because of his qualifications!"

"Indeed, we sense the eldritch within him!"

The god or whatever raises one white eyebrow.

"Re. Jec. Ted. Rejected. That? That whole thing?" The being asks, waving a hand generally at Wally's everything. "That is not going anywhere near my Fraid or my Haunt."

"Hey!" Wally says incredulously, "The hell did I do to you, man?"

"No no, that's the beauty of it!" A cultist interrupts him, also motioning at Wally's everything. "As a member of your harem and also one already tainted by the unknowable, he can stay out of your personal lair and stay in the Eternal Void, and you can just make sure he pleases you in wherever way you desi-"

"That thing is also not getting anywhere near my dick. In fact? This? This is done. I am done."

The being snaps his fingers into fingerguns, points at the shackles on Wally, and breaks them with green beams of light.

"Run free and far away frommmmmmmholy fuck get away from me!"

"So what, am I not good enough for you?" Wally asks, now in the beings face and ignoring the cultists.

Fuck those guys, but this just got personal.

~~~~~~

Danny is being hounded by one of Clockwork's worst nightmares, thanks to a stupid cult that thinks he's A, a god, and B, has a harem.

Great.

He's supposed to be at his 21st birthday party, getting legally wasted, and now he's getting hit on the man responsible for a not one, not two, but three week adventure through the time stream he just got back from.

This man and his ilk are responsible for nearly all of Danny's Clockwork Assignments, specifically to fix the timestream and reality, and he has the balls to ask why Danny doesn't like him?!

First Visit

OG

In a series of unknown events Jason woke up to something warm and vibrating on his chest, as well as what he belatedly recognized as purring near his face.

Opening his eyes he found a fluffy black cat on his chest, doing what Damian had called a "perfect cat loaf" once when showing him a picture of Alfred the cat. Rubbing his eyes he stared at the cat, he didn't have a cat.

Bedroom door? Closed.

Window? Closed.

How did a cat get in here? Did Damian need to hide a cat and forget to tell him? He shuddered as he was reminded of that one time out of many in the league where he woke up with some kind of lizard or snake suddenly in his room.

Well, the purring was nice, and Jason knew as well as anybody that you didn't disturb a napping kitty. Reaching over to his nightstand he looked at his phone, no new messages from his family, a pic from Roy with Lian did make him smile at least. Opening the chat with Damian he took a photo of the cat and sent it with the caption " This yours?"

He saw that the message got read, then nothing, okay then.

"Yip!" Suppressing a flinch and clutching his phone, so he didn't throw it, he snapped his head to the side and saw a small, green puppy leaning its head on his mattress while staring up at him.

Slowly Jason turned his phone to snap another picture, this time of the dog, before sending it to Damian with a "What the fuck?" - read again, then nothing. The puppy whimpered. Jason glanced at it again. The puppy seemed to stand on its hind legs while his front legs were now clawing at his mattress so he could get up on the bed.

"The brat owes me so much, up you go, be nice to the cat." Helping the dog up with one hand while trying not to jostle the cat was a bit of a struggle with the pup squirming so much. But as soon as the puppy was up he walked over to the cat, laid his head down on his front paws and gave small licks to the cats' side.

The cat opened its eyes, an intense green, nearly glowing, turned to the dog, gave him a lick over his nosebridge and then went back to napping.

The puppy jumped up, proceeded to hit Jason square in the face with his fast wagging tail and then gave playful growls to the cat, obsiously wanting to play.

The cat ignored it.

The puppy suddenly pounced, making the cat roll off Jasons chest with a squaking meow before it landed on its legs and proceeded to jump off the bed towards Jasons legs and then to the ground. The puppy followed, happily yipping at the cat. White botted paws now visible as Jason feared the worst, but before he could do anything the cat suddenly stilled, ears flickering.

The puppy tilted its head, gave the cat a lick before the cat swished its tail into the puppies face and bolted through the wall out of the bedroom.

Well... that explained how it entered, and the puppy followed, also through the wall, and Jason decided he needed breakfast before he tried to make sense of what just happened.

He stopped when he saw Damian break in through the window just as he entered his living room. The two brothers stared at each other.

"Tt. Where is the cat Todd?" Damian closed the window behind himself, looking around.

"It ran outside through the wall." 'Cause why not? Why should Jason be the only one baffled on this fine morning?

Bruce: Oh no. Dick: What is it? Bruce: Do you remember Danny Fenton? Dick: The biological son you found out about one year before he turned 18? Yeah, I remember Damian was having an aneurysm. What about him? Bruce: Well, he was willing to get to know me, but he's not looking to replace the man who raised him, so he wanted to do things slowly. I agree and have been watching him from a distance. Dick: Okay? What's the problem then? Bruce: The Court of Owls just took him. Dick: Shit. I'll call the others, we can rescue him as soon- Bruce: No no no you don't understand. Danny is far more dangerous then the Court of Owls. I fear by the time we get there it be too late. Dick: He's going to kill them!? Bruce whispering: Worse. He's going to turn them into Skeletons for his undead army, forever doomed to serve him until those they wronged forgive their souls. Death would be far kinder than what is waiting for the Court Members. Dick: Bruce.....did you sleep with a god again? We told you to stop doing that. Bruce: Actually, Maddie is completely human. Danny, on the other hand, died when he was fourteen, overthrew the previous Ghost King, and now controls the afterworld with far too much energy drinks and internet memes in his system. Dick: You promised this kid would be different Bruce. Bruce: Hey, I have not made him a vigilante. He did that on his own. Plus, he isn't a vigilante now; he's more of a morally compromised trickster god.

Salesman Danny

My brain did that thing where it just says "Hey wouldn't this be funny?"

There was a knock on the door. The room fell silent, nobody knocked on this door. People either entered because they could, or were summoned and then let in.

Ra's, slightly more intrigued than annoyed, told the person to enter.

The door opened, in came a tall man with a rather big box pulled behind him.

"Hello, thank you for having me!" The man glanced at the lazarus pits and slightly crinkled his nose before turning back to Ra's.

"It's good I came now, before it's too late and your pool of ectoplasm gets more corrupted. In this spirit, may I present you the Fenton Ectoplasm Filter 5.0! For all your filtering needs! If you buy the Fenton Ectoplasm Filter 5.0 subscription we will even come by to change the filter container each quarter." He pulled out what looked like a big pool filter, with added boxes, the boxes had green lines and Fenton Ectoplasm Filter 5.0 was painted over the side above the highest line.

"I could give you a demonstration, however with how contaminated your ectoplasm pool is it will take a while to fully filter it." Ra's decided to just let the man talk, giving him a nod. He watched as the filter was placed to the edge of the lazarus pool, half submerged before a button was pressed and a low humm was heard.

Lazarus water was pulled into the filter and after a minute what appeared to be lighter colored lazarus water flowed out from the other side.

"The filter can be mounted to the side like it is now, or it can float around with the added floater. If children use your ectoplasm pool I would recomend the mounted version to protect both the filter and the child from accidental damage. We do give out a 20 year warranty with every Fenton Ectoplasm Filter 5.0, we would give out longer warranties but in case of a newer and improved filter being invented in the next ten years it is reccomended to upgrade rather then repair!"

The man stood up again, letting the filter push out the rest of the lazarus water before wiping it with a cloth that seemed to also be Fenton branded. He walked over to Ra's, opening one of the boxes on the filter to show a slime-like substance that had a dark, near black, green color.

"As you can see your ectoplasm pool is very contaminated, as such I would reccomend a monthly filter clear instead of quarterly, don't worry about the contamination itself, we have a contract with the Infinite Realms and the Far Frozen to fully recycle it!"

"Recycle?" Ra's eyed the man, maybe this filter would get rid of the problem of the less and less effective pits.

"Yes! A small part will be used for research for better filtration systems, a rather big part will be used to test new medicines against corruption in Ghosts and whatever can not be used will be put into the cleansing sprout in the Infinte Realms to make sure nobody gets corrupted by accident!" He clapped his hands after he put the filter back into his box.

"If you want I can leave a pamphlet with you for other inventions and services Fenton Works offers for Liminals and Ecto Entities! We do also have a website for better overview! I would reccomend you the Fenton Ecto Cleansing Shots to get rid of the contamination in your own ecto, it works wonders and can be injected if you would rather not drink it." He opened the pamphlet and showed a small vial with light green lazarus water, calm. Next to it were two injectors, one manual and one automatic.

Ra's took the pamphlet, calmly looking through it. Two older generations of Fenton Ectoplasm Filters were in it, as well as a few other things to cleanse ecto, some circle that advertises as a floating device, as well as three generations of Fenton Thermos at the end. Those were advertised as both an ecto holding device as well as a container for mean spirited Ecto Entities.

"You sell all of this?" He looked at the man again, aside from being even taller than Ra's himself he looked rather unassuming.

"Yes! There is an order label at the end as well, we deliver per Portal so there are transportation costs listed but we do always deliver on time! Our website had more services as well, now would you like to purchase the Fenton Ectoplasm Filter 5.0 with subscription?" Ra's looked back into the pamphlet, the filter was expensive, the subscription as well, but it wasn't money he couldn't easily spend.

And if it did turn out this filter would get rid of his problems it was money very well spend.

"I just have to fill out this little form here?" The man seemed to jump towards him with a wide smile, showing fangs and a bit too many teeth.

"Yes! If you would just cross off what you want to purchase I'll take the order with me now and you'll be guaranteed delivery and installation tomorrow! Please show proof of payment upon delivery for no delays."

Damian stared at the lazarus pool, it was calm and a lighter color than usual, the only difference in surroundings was the lowly humming filter at the edge. He looked towards his grandfather while holding his hurt arm.

"Do go on Damian." So he did, the lazarus pit he knew to be bubbling was now calm like a lake. He felt the difference when he stepped in, it wasn't like the water tried to pull him under. His arm healed faster than it ever did before. His mother smiled, his grandfather looked pleased.

"It was worth investing into Fenton Works, genius inventors, their son is around your age Talia."

"Mother already has father, grandfather!" Damian protested as he climbed out of the pool.

"Yes of course, Damian. How is your newest aquisition doing dear daughter?"

"Jason is doing fine, he seems to take well to the online therapist you found for him." Ra's looked content as he thought about the website he had visited after Danny had sold him the filter.

Truly a masterpiece of a business. The front and center their inventions, a side for cyber security and programs, a shop for plants and plantcare services, as well as a therapist. Fenton Works was a marvel he gladly invested in. And if that meant he would get early access to their inventions? Well, he did like the new shield around his bases.

Danny: Wow, when Jazz told me she knew a guy that could tutor me in English, she didn't mention you be so buff.

Jason: Is that a problem?

Danny flustered: No no no! I guess I was expecting someone as scrawny as me. I've never been good at working out.

Jason: Hmm, well, if you want, I can also help you work out. I'm at the gym before I come to our tutoring sessions anyway.

Danny faintly: Okay.

Jason: Great. I go to the campus gym so we can meet there. Anyway, Jazz said you needed help with Shakespearian chapters?

Danny even more faint: Shakespeare....uses English I don't understand.

Jason moving closer: I'm sorry I didn't catch that.

Danny whispering: Help me, I'm too gay.

Jason: What?

Danny panicked: I said help me I'm too slay!

Jason: Ugh, I guess your outfit is nice, but what's that got to do with Shakespeare?

Jazz spying from a near by table: This idiot is blowing it.

Dick from another nearby table also spying: I know the feeling. I set Jay up for the perfect opportunity to charm his crush, and he's focusing on Shakespeare!

This is the chaos I want to see in a crossover 🤩

“Meet the Parents (And Their Armory)”

When Danny said, “You guys should meet my parents,” the Batkids had collectively paused.

Jason: “Aren’t those the ones who tried to dissect you?”

Danny: “They got better.”

Damian: “You are very casual about attempted vivisection.”

Danny: “Welcome to the Fenton family, baby.”

Dick: “This can’t possibly go wrong.”

Steph: “Famous last words.”

FentonWorks — Amity Park

The Batkids stepped out of the Fenton RV, staring up at the lime green, Frankenstein’d-together house with a giant ectoplasmic turret on top.

Tim whispered, “That building violates every safety code I’ve ever studied.”

“Which means it’s perfect,” Jason grinned.

The front door burst open.

“DANNY-BOY!” Jack Fenton roared, charging out in a hazmat suit and hugging Danny so hard he phased to avoid cracked ribs.

“And these must be your little friends!” Maddie beamed. “Are they in your ghost hunting club? Vigilante group? Paranormal protection gang?”

Jason: “...Yes.”

Inside the Lab

Danny’s siblings (by chaos, not blood) stood in awe-slash-terror as Jack proudly showed off the Fenton Arsenal™.

“We’ve got Ecto-Blasters, Specter Snare Cannons, the Ghost Gabber 9000—”

“That one doesn’t do anything,” Danny stage-whispered. “It just yells ghost puns.”

“—and of course, my favorite,” Jack said, hefting a glowing, bazooka-sized monstrosity, “The Fenton Anti-Creep Stick™!”

“Can I hold it?” Jason asked immediately.

Danny: “You really, really shouldn’t—”

Jack: “You absolutely can!”

Danny: “—oh god.”

Jason grinned like a kid in a candy store as he hoisted the Anti-Creep Stick and blew a crater in the backyard. “I LOVE YOUR DAD.”

Gift Time

“So!” Maddie chirped. “We made each of you a custom ghost-defense item!”

Danny: “...Please be small.”

They were not.

Jason got a pair of twin ecto-revolvers — glowing green, sleek, with ghost-seeking tech embedded in the handles. He was in love.

Tim got a pocket-sized spectral scanner that unfolded into a full laptop. (“It hacks through dimensions,” Maddie said proudly. Tim nearly cried.)

Damian was gifted a miniaturized spectral scimitar. Jack added, “It sings your theme song when it powers up!” Damian smiled — a terrifying, sharp little smile.

Steph got an ectoplasm glitter bomb launcher. She immediately set it off in the kitchen. Maddie was delighted.

Dick received ecto-infused grappling hooks that let him swing through walls. He hugged both parents on the spot.

Later That Night

The Batkids lounged on beanbags in Danny’s room, covered in marshmallow goo from Fenton family s’mores night.

Steph: “Your mom tackled a ghost into the barbecue pit.”

Tim: “Your dad gave me a hug that cracked my ribs.”

Jason (stroking his new guns lovingly): “I’m moving in.”

Danny: “You’ll regret that at 3AM when the fridge starts screaming.”

Damian: “Your father attempted to high-five me. I allowed it. Once.”

Danny snorted. “He’s gonna cry from happiness later.”

Meanwhile, in the Fenton Kitchen

Maddie sipped her tea. “They’re good kids.”

Jack nodded, eyes misty. “Do you think if we adopt them too, we can finally start that Ghost Hero Team I always wanted?”

Maddie smiled. “Let’s give them snacks first.”

Group Chat: [Batfam + Phantom of the Groupchat]

Jason: Can I call your dad Pops?

Danny: ...I literally do not have the power to stop you.

Steph: i want to go back next weekend. ghost dodgeball rematch.

Damian: I defeated the kitchen specter with honor. Fenton called it a “heckin’ good whack.”

Tim: I still don’t know how the toaster is haunted.

Dick: Best parents. A+++ would let them arm me again.

Danny: they’re already building a tank for you.

Bruce: WHAT DO YOU MEAN "A TANK"

Danny: Too late B. You’re a Fenton by association now 😎