There Is Something So Special To Me About Steve Staring At The Ceiling And Mistaking The Lights For Stars.

obsessed with the idea that as soon Steve Harrington realizes that he is bi he skips over the internalized homophobia and the denial and goes straight (not! lol) to boyfriend. He tells Robin he has a crush on Eddie while he drives her to school in the morning and by the time they have their shift in the afternoon he is already Wayne's son in law. He gets over the whole crisis stuff in like 5 mins and panics instead over where he will take Eddie on their first date. He realized he really wants to run his hands through Eddie's hair (in a gay way) and half an hour later he already has his tongue down his throat.

(In the same universe as this post because it’s funnier that way)

Wayne spends an hour talking to Steve, trying to build some connection with the kid since it seems like he’s gonna be around for a while and Eddie really likes him.

It’s not the most natural conversation because neither seem to be big talkers but Wayne feels pretty good about it. Until Steve leaves and Eddie opens his trap.

Eddie, trying his best to destroy their can opener in the kitchen, says ten minutes after Steve leaves, “Wayne, I thought you hated being in marching band.”

“I did.”

“Why’d you spend an hour talking about it then?” Eddie asks. “I’ve literally never heard you say that much about anything.”

“Steve’s in the marching band. Just trying to find some common ground.”

“Steve’s not in the marching band.”

“Yes, he is,” Wayne says. “He was wearing a marching band tshirt.”

“No, Steve’s wearing Robin’s tshirt,” Eddie grins, finally succeeding in opening a can of peaches. “Robin is in the marching band. Steve graduated last year.”

Well. Fuck.

“What the hell does that kid like?”

“I dunno,” Eddie shrugs (he absolutely does know). “He kinda just goes with the flow.”

eddie who is kind of evil when he's horny and sexually frustrated, which directly affects his mood as a dm. he makes it absolutely painful and unsatisfying to play.

dustin who has the brightest idea in the world goes to steve, eddie's boyfriend, and says "i will literally give you anything within my power if you give that asshole a blowjob before each campaign."

steve, who is in fact NOT eddie's boyfriend, is very confused but also enjoys the idea of dustin forever being in his debt, and delivers.

After checks calendar 84 years, I am once again offering Smart Steve content lmao

Listen the writer's block has been hitting recently if you couldn't tell, but I'm still happy with how this came out.

As always, if you see any typos, no you didn't :P

----

So.

Steve Harrington is smart.

Like, smart smart.

Like, the kind of smart where he not only understands shit, he can explain complicated shit to Eddie without sending his brain into a coma.

It's been two weeks, and Eddie is still trying to come to terms with this discovery. He's four tutoring sessions in and a little spark of surprise still rocks him whenever Steve can easily explain a new topic using the stuff Eddie likes.

He explained velocity using D&D spells. He explained electrical circuits using the concept of plugging a guitar into an amp. After asking a few questions about Lord of the Rings, Steve Harrington managed to explain the in-depth concepts of magnetism using the fucking One Ring.

How the fuck is Eddie supposed to be normal about any of that? Ignoring the sheer fact that Steve is capable of it, how is Eddie supposed to feel about the...the willingness to learn what Eddie understands best and meet him on that level?

If the answer is awed and practically starstruck, he's ahead of the game.

"Hey, you doing okay? Kinda spacing out over there, man."

Eddie blinks, the textbook in front of him coming back into focus. Steve had been explaining the concept of momentum, but his words just floated in one ear and out the other because Eddie was once again consumed by the absurdity of the situation.

It's not like he can say that, though. So, instead, he settles for a grimace and pushes the textbook away. "I think I'm all fried out for physics," he says, looking up at Steve.

"Oh," Steve says, blinking a few times before nodding. "Yeah, sure, uh, sorry."

"Wait, what are you sorry about?"

Steve looks away, an awkward frown tugging at his lips. "I...probably wasn't explaining it too well, huh?"

"Woah, woah, no way," Eddie says, putting a stop to that train of thought before it can leave the station. He turns in his chair to face Steve directly, ignoring how the metal rod that attaches it to the desk digs painfully against his shin. "Listen, Stevie, I've never understood physics more than when you explain it. Like, I don't know, man, whatever you're doing works."

Steve must have been more worried than he let on, because Eddie can literally see the tension draining from his shoulders. "Great," he says, rubbing the back of his neck as he glances away. "Seriously, that's great. I'm glad nothing's been confusing."

"Yeah, so, nothing you did," Eddie says, feeling like he needs to reiterate that point to drive it home. "Honestly, you could probably even make me understand geometry. Not like our teacher is doing shit to help."

"Do you...not understand geometry?" Steve asks, looking a little unsure like he can't tell if that's a joke or Eddie's attempt at suggesting another class he needs help in. This one is a class they share, which means Steve will have seen Eddie's floundering attempts at answering questions, and he feels a whole new burn of embarrassment course through him.

"Do you?" Eddie asks in return.

"Yeah. It's just, like, angles and shit, man."

Eddie stares at him for a moment, eyes narrowing and trying to figure out if Steve is somehow, subtly, making fun of him. But of course he isn't. If Eddie has learned nothing else, it's that Steve doesn't ever think Eddie is actually stupid or deserving of ridicule. He just thinks Eddie hasn't been taught properly, which is more on the teacher than him.

After a moment, Eddie twists around to dig in his bag. He pulls out his geometry homework, slaps it on the desk, and gestures at the triangles and squares and other shapes with unidentified angles and side lengths. "I have literally no clue what the fuck is going on here," he says.

Steve moves closer, looking over the sheet with a slight frown. Eddie knows this face by now. It's the one Steve makes when he's searching for the relevant knowledge in his own brain, pulling it to the front so he can easily identify the gaps in Eddie's understanding. "So, how would you start?" Steve finally asks, offering his pencil.

Eddie takes it, twirls it between his fingers a few times, and looks over the questions. He eventually chooses one asking him to find the length of a side. "I know this one. It's the equation with the squares and shit," he says, carefully writing it out and plugging in numbers under the triangle.

"Right. Pythagorean theorem. A squared plus B squared equals C squared."

"Yeah. That," Eddie says, working through the math on a separate sheet of paper instead of in his head. He can do easy addition and subtraction, but one of the first things Steve did was get him used to using scratch paper. His brain doesn't feel quite as crowded by numbers anymore; now it's just crowded by the endless rotation of bites of knowledge and equations that have nothing to do with the work at hand. It's like his brain can recognize that it needs to remember something, but can't identify what exactly, so it just offers up everything.

When he's done, Eddie shows Steve his work, the answer circled at the bottom of the scratch paper. "Perfect," Steve says, flashing a smile that makes Eddie's heart lurch dangerously. "Okay, so that's solid. What about this one."

He points at a right triangle with only one angle listed and the other marked as unknown. "No fucking clue," Eddie says.

"This one is asking for the unknown angle. It'll just be some subtraction."

"It's only giving me one angle, Stevie," Eddie points out, gesturing to the angle marked as 53. "What the fuck do I do with that?"

"Well, the main thing is that a triangles angles will always add to 180. Also, this is a right triangle," Steve explains, taking the pencil from Eddie to circle the L-shaped corner of the triangle. "This angle will always be 90 degrees on right triangles. Should I keep going?"

"No," Eddie says slowly, drawing the word out as he takes the pencil back. "I'm starting to get it. Lemme try."

Steve waits patiently as Eddie hesitates before adding the angles together and subtracting that from 180. When he gets to a solution of 37, he gestures for Steve to check.

"That's right," Steve says, nodding as he points to another triangle on the sheet. "For this one, I'll teach you about the SOH CAH TOA trick."

Eddie nods, paying as much attention as he can, but he can't help feeling a little distracted by Steve's happy smile and relaxed posture. He's never seen Steve like this during class, and he's struck by the sudden notion that nobody else will see Steve like this, either.

------

When Steve gets home, he drops his bag in the hallway, grabs a soda from the kitchen, and collapses onto the couch.

A few National Geographic and Scientific American magazines are still spread out across the coffee table. A brief glance reminds Steve that none of the stories were particularly interesting in these editions.

He pops the tab on his soda, takes a sip, and glances at the phone on the end table next to him.

Steve had noticed something today. Eddie's shirt. Most of the band shirts Eddie wears are popular enough that Steve sort of knows them. Metallica, KISS, and AC/DC were recognizable since he's passed their albums on display in record stores.

Today's band, though. He didn't recognize that one. What the fuck was Manowar?

After a few seconds of thought, Steve reaches out and grabs the phone. He's just doing research. Wanting to understand the music Eddie likes is reasonable. That's how Eddie learns. There's no other reason for Steve dialing the number of an old classmate.

The phone rings a few times before picking up. "Amare residence," a girl says, sounding distracted.

"Hey, Dee. It's Steve."

"Hmm, Steve. Steve. ...Steeeeve. Oh, is this Steve Harrington, deserter of friends for the woes of public education?"

Despite everything, Steve can't help an amused smile. "Yeah, that Steve," he says. He doesn't apologize, since he knows that's not what she wants. If she was actually angry, she would've hung up.

"Well, how kind of you to grace me with your voice," Dee says, sounding distant like she's set the phone down. "I suppose I can give you until I finish braiding my hair."

"Great. You know about metal, right?"

"Like iron? Duh, Steve, I'm not thirteen."

"No, like, heavy metal."

"Iron is pretty heavy."

"Music, Dee. Heavy metal music."

"Oh! Aren't you a Tears for Fears kind of boy? What are you doing asking about heavy metal?"

Steve starts to answer but stops himself. He doesn't know why. Dee tutors kids all the time. Everyone in their private school group did. That's how they made money. She'd understand that he's trying to learn more about Eddie's interests for tutoring purposes.

So why can't he just say that?

"This long pause says you're thinking about lying to me," Dee says. "Don't bother, Steve."

"Well, I do want to know for the guy I'm tutoring. But not just because I'm tutoring him."

"Awww, are you trying to make a friend?" Dee teases.

Steve grimaces, wondering why his stomach twists slightly at the question. "Yeah, kind of. I want to know more about the stuff he likes. And he likes heavy metal. So, ya know, I thought of you."

"Well, you've come to the right place," Dee says. "And I love talking music, so I guess we can keep talking even after I'm done braiding."

A relieved smile tugs at Steve's lips. "Thanks, Dee, I appreciate it. So, first question, what's Manowar?"

-------

Tag List!

@estrellami-1, @ravenfrog,

The Kid's Appreciation

Summary: After their 7th day of recieving gifts the Kids start hatching a plot to thank Steve. Their parents had better get on board cause these kids will love Steve into crying on Christmas

A Christmas Day Ending to this post of Steve giving the kids advent treats

~

It took a week of daily treats from the music box for them to start planning.

Of course the kids expected Steve to be there for them if hell opened up again, and to give them lifts and keep in touch if it didn’t, but the music box and the things he was filling it with were something none of them had predicted.

“We should do something for Steve!” Dustin exclaimed it when they met up with Lucas, Mike and Max at the arcade.

Max gave him a deadpan stare, replying, “Der, some of us have been thinking of gifts since he started this.”

“He doesn’t want stuff. He wants company.” He met her judgemental tone with his own, rolling his eyes and thinking before turning to them with an idea in his eyes.

Mike backed off a couple steps. “No, I know that look-”

“Lets have a Surprise Christmas Party for him!” Dustin declared.

“Lucas, you’re helping me convince Mum and Dad. I’ll help with yours.” Mike bargained immediately.

Lucas laughed but that cut off when Max huffed, “Mine will never go for it.”

“I can convince Mrs Mayfield.” Dustin nodded assuredly. “So Christmas Day, we get everyone together then call Steve to come join the fun.”

“It’s doubtful we’ll actually convince our parents to let us do this on Christmas and where are you planning this to be?” Lucas asked sceptically.

“Mom or Hopper might know. I could ask them.” Will offered, “And if they’re suggesting it the other parents might agree more easily.”

“Perfect, that’s enough to get started planning with. Talk to them in the next few days and then we’ll do more.” Dustin grinned.

~

“We want everyone to get together on Christmas Day.” Will said, watching his Mom and Hopper carefully as the words changed how dinner conversation had been going.

Joyce reacted first with a commiserating noise, “Honey, The other kids families want to spend time with them too, we can’t take them away from that.”

“But we’re family too. You’ve said it to most of them, Steve, Dustin.” He began listing, already thinking of which other arguments might convince them to actually arrange the gathering.

El nodded beside him, “You said that we’re all family now because we look after each other and saved each others lives. And you were talking about just adopting Max two nights ago.”

“Her mother is-” Hopper began to grumble but cut himself off, clearing his throat. “Sure kids, all of us are family but their families don’t understand that and they’ll argue that seeing their cousins or grandparents one of the few times they’ll visit in a year is more important than spending time with people who you see regularly.”

“And we’ve not got a big enough space to host everyone. Where would you want this party to be?” Jonathan added, looking around their home and dismissing the idea Hoppers cabin would work since that was smaller.

“We could use the fire pit?” Will suggested, but his expression already showed how he disliked the idea of sitting outside in December, even if there was a fire. “Or take it to Steve’s? But cook the food here, so he doesn’t feel like he has to host.”

Hopper narrowed his eyes, “Why wouldn’t you be asking Harrington to host already if you wanted to do that?”

Will fell silent, pushing food around his plate.

“Because we want to surprise him with it to thank him for everything he’s doing for us.” El replied plainly. “Eddie can fetch him if we find somewhere other than his home we can all go to.”

Hopper huffed, knowing that with El and Will wanting to do this they’d probably manage to, adults accepting or not. “I’ll ask around places that might let us have some space this week, but no promises. Now tell me what Harrington has been doing to inspire this?”

Will and El tripped over themselves to explain, including pulling out the gloves Steve had given them.

~

"Joyce invited us to a Christmas gathering." Nancy mentioned casually as they had a family dinner. "Mostly Mike and I but you can come too."

Ted looked over at her in interest, "You've not asked permission to go anywhere for a while. When is this gathering?"

Nancy halfway turned to Mike, not quite checking the details as she said, "Christmas day about 3pm."

"We've got to go, Dad. They're our family too after everything we've gone through together." Mike insisted before the frowns on their parents faces could become refusal or objections.

"Family isn't made by sneaking away from your actual family and cross country road trips. Christmas day is to be with us and possibly your girlfriend." Ted dictated. "Ask Joyce to do it a day later."

Nancy glared, "We want to gather with the people who kept us alive through the darkest moments of the year on Christmas. We shouldn't argue with the planning Joyce has already done. That's ungrateful."

~

"Sue, hi, how are you?" Mike hurried downstairs when he heard the greeting, spotting Erica and Lucas stood behind Mrs Sinclairs, strained smiles on their faces that tightened when they saw him. Clearly the Wheelers weren't the only ones resisting their plans.

"Hi Karen. I'm well but wanted to know if you were also being asked to give up your Family Christmas for the kids to see each other." Sue replied pleasantly.

"They aren't just friends. We're brothers basically. After everything that's happened in Hawkins, we want Christmas to be for all of us." Mike frustratedly explained.

"And it's for Steve! I tried telling ours, he's going to be alone! On Christmas! And we're his family, us and Joyce and hopper, Robin and Eddie, so we need to be there for him." Erica added, annoyed and making Mike think that should have been their argument from the start.

Karen looked at her shocked. "What do you mean he's alone? Isn't he going to meet his parents somewhere if they can't come here?"

"No!" All the kids protested immediately, Lucas adding, "They never visited him those weeks he was in hospital after the earthquake or even called. Do you really think they'd do something for Christmas if a town destroying earthquake gets no reaction?"

She looked thoughtful now, "And you're sure Joyce is right to arrange a big gathering instead of inviting him to holiday with them? We'd love to have Steve here even."

"That's not all his family though." Erica said, her tone calling their mothers dumb even if she wouldn't say it. "He's the one giving us things every day this month. Why can't we go to the Byers thing and give back to him on Christmas?"

Sue and Karen shared a look. "Okay, we'll think about it but this isn't an agreement yet." Sue said on a sigh.

The three kids shared victorious grins.

~

"Dustin, can you come here Sweetie?" Claudia called upstairs. He'd listened to her chatting at the door for a while and ran downstairs now.

He glanced into the living room expecting Joyce to have been invited in. "Yes?"

"I know you like our small Christmases together but Mrs Byers just invited us to a Christmas with them. Would you like that just as much?" She asked hopefully, clearly joyful at the idea of more people around to share the day with.

Dustin beamed at her, "That'd be fantastic! I hope Steve's there too. And Max. Do you know if she invited the Mayfields?"

"I'm not sure but I'll call and ask. If not then I'm sure she won't mind me doing so." she assured him.

~

"No I see my daughter little enough as it is." Mrs Mayfield shut down Joyce's invitation before she'd finished saying it.

Hopper huffed, "And whose fault is that?"

"Hope, we're making a friendly invitation for them both to come. Don't insult her." Joyce warned, smiling through gritted teeth.

He folded his arms, judging Max's mother still, "Just say there'll be alcohol and she'll come. Skip the frills."

At those words the door was slammed on the pair but an hour later Max called to confirm they'd come.

~

"Christmas for Steve is go!" Lucas declared through the radio. "But we should still try to get him something."

A moment later Max replied, "A best mum mug or something equally sappy would make him cry."

"Heartfelt and condescending, he'd definitely know it's from us." Will quipped, snickers following the words.

"No, we need to give him a lightsaber and dice, get him to play with us." Dustin protested.

"I think Robin would know what we should give him." El said, her voice clearer than the rest suggesting she'd used her powers to help it.

~

Steve answered the door in confusion. Nobody should be visiting on Christmas day, they never had before though he'd occasionally been invited before the day to join other families on Christmas.

Outside stood Robin and Eddie, grinning as he looked them over, "What are you doing here? You're meant to be with your families."

"Wayne will meet us there. Come on Stevie, didn't you get your invite?" Eddie coaxed.

Robin shook her head, "We're his invite. And apparently an invitation from Hopper is too important for me to refuse so I got sent on my way earlier. Get your shoes and coat and we'll head off."

"Invite to what? Why wouldn't they have invited me before now whoever is arranging this?" Steve eyed them, but did turn to get ready to leave after a moment.

"It's a surprise and because they wanted to surprise you." Robin cheerfully replied.

"The kids then. Fine, let's go." he headed to Eddie's van, never questioning if he could drive them there.

Eddie’s car radio was just as loud as he usually had it but the tape playing was Christmas tunes that got Steve to laugh and had them all singing along on their way.

~

When Eddie pulled up outside the school, Steve hesitated. He watched the building cautiously, eyes scanning over the doors to store rooms and the entrance to the main building until he smiled at something.

Just beneath the roof on the corner was a flickering fairy light that he headed towards, even as Robin and Eddie seemed to dig through their pockets for something he assumed would be their invitations. He didn’t mind, since the kids had left him directions already.

Following the string of lights, and ignoring the calls of Robin and Eddie behind him questioning where they were going, Steve saw a gift attached to the lights with a ribbon but not hanging from them. “Do you think I should gather these and wait until I’m with the kids to open them, or just open it now?” He asked, cutting off a complaint as Eddie realised the invitation didn’t say where in the school whatever was happening would be.

“Now,” Robin decided. “I want to see what they got you.”

Eddie made a disagreeing noise, “Ah ah ah, are we sure that this is for Steve? We could be following someone else’s string of fairy lights.”

“It says Steve and also, no we couldn’t be. Why would anyone else chose the school to have their Christmas at?” Judgement infused Steve’s voice as he replied, more focused on unwrapping the gift, smiling softly at the painted flowers and ‘World’s Best Mom’ caption on the mug when he saw it. “Such shitheads. I love them.” He muttered, turning to carry on following the lights.

He carried on following the lights, snickering when the chain ended and a card was balanced between the plug for that string of lights and the next. The card was filled with small messages from all the kids, as well as Joyce, Hopper, Wayne, Nancy, Jonathan and Eddie, saying what they loved about Steve. With tears in his eyes he looked up to see the name missing from inside it.

“Where’s your message?” He teased, trying to pretend he wasn’t as moved as he was by the card.

Robin pulled a small card from her pocket, “Over here for after your kids have made you cry.”

“So thoughtful.” He laughed wetly. “Let’s see what else they’re giving.”

Around the next corner the lights went around Dustin was waiting, “Check point one reached.” He muttered into his radio before waving. “Steve! Open this now, pleeeaaaasssseee.”

“Hug first, shithead. You’re being too sweet when I wasn’t prepared.” Steve insisted, pulling him in before he could protest and causing the present to hit into his back.

“We love you, let us show it.” was mumbled into his chest just before Dustin pulled back, holding the gift out to him again.

Steve was still smiling as he unwrapped the gift, revealing two lightsabers and immediately keeping the green one while holding the blue one out to Dustin. “Dude, these would be so great for our handshake!”

As the pair went through their handshake Eddie draped a hand over Robin’s shoulder’s, “What is this and why haven’t I seen it before?”

“Their secret handshake. Dustin decided he was too old for it when he started high school but Steve says they still do it if it’s just them around. I guess having actual lightsabers overrules the too old thing.” She murmured back, smiling.

“Adorable.” Eddie smiled at the scene even more now. “Come on nerds, we’ve got a gathering quest to finish.” he called after Steve’s overdramatic death scene, laughing with them when Steve happily jumped up, neaten his hair and focused back on following the lights.

As they turned to carry on, Max came down the hall in the opposite direction. “Me and him are escorting you the rest of the way, Steve. The favourites get to babysit their babysitter tonight.”

“And you get a hug as well.” Steve agreed, tugging her in with only a grumbling groan in protest.

The hug was tight and carried on for enough moments that Dustin added himself to it, wrapping around both of them until Max pulled back.

She looked at Steve for a moment before tugging something red from her pocket. “You’ve got a party to attend, and a hat to wear, Santa.”

Steve only laughed and ducked down slightly so she could force it onto his head. “I guess I did do this to you. Is this one I got even?”

“Maybe, didn’t ask, I got an elf hat that day.” Max shrugged, taking one of Steve’s arms while Dustin took the other to keep them moving into the school gym.

Inside the gym was everyone, not yelling out ‘Surprise’ or turning all the attention on them immediately but separately waving or calling out greetings when breaks in their conversation naturally happened. Steve wanted to bask in it, or wander over to the other kids and join their chats, thank them for what they put towards this unexpected celebration, but the two on his arms led him over to the Christmas tree immediately.

“Now Santa Sweetheart, have you been good this year?” Eddie followed them, somehow getting a bright red long coat on in the time they’d walked across the gym and falling into his DM persona.

Steve laughed at the combination but nodded, “As good as I can be, even tried to save a few lives and convince others not to throw theirs away running into danger.” He replied, but wondered if he should have argued.

Eddie nodded slowly, eyes narrowing as if he was making a tough decision, “That does sound very good, but-”

“We’ve got evidence!” Robin interrupted, laughing and holding out her card. “Here, read this!”

Echoes of “And this” sprang up around the room and Steve didn’t notice who handed him a box of tissues as Eddie did indeed start reading out all the good or wonderful things his family thought he’d done that year, a lot of which he hadn’t thought about doing at all.

The kids ended up all gathered around him, all touching him in some way if they weren’t the lucky ones to have claimed his lap, which were Erica and El.

“We love Steve.” El said simply when Eddie fell silent, seemingly torn between going back into character or adding his own words.

He nodded at her words. “That we do, Supergirl, that we do. Steve Harrington is definitely on the good list this year and should get all the gifts he desires. However this is Hawkins and the funding just isn’t there apparently. Can I interest you in some awesome artwork and a dozen or more cards to fight any negative thoughts in your head?”

Through happy tears Steve nodded, reaching out for them. “Love you all too, thank you so much.”

“And the happiest Christmas we could put together for you too, Dingus.” Robin reached over to softly shake his shoulder, stood somewhere behind him and his kids.

El being wholesome with Steve. El being wholesome with Steve. The weird sibling duo we didn’t know we needed. I need more of it. I might do it….no I’ve done enough of them…

Okay, okay. But just picture this:

The kids trying to embarrass Steve all the time with photos and stories to Eddie, but El ruins it every.single.time. because she is so unbelievably wholesome when it comes to Steve.

Here is everyone pulling out scoops photos (which Eddie actually loves thank you very much) and sharing stories about his failed dates. Dustin tells Eddie specifically about the time he was teaching Lucas basketball and Lucas threw the ball too hard at the backboard and hit Steve in the face.

So they are all poking fun at Steve in his and Robin’s apartment (because in every universe these platonic soulmates live together) and there is just El who randomly chimes in:

“Steve took me to this thing called a ren faire once. It was very fun. We both looked really pretty.”

Eddie absolutely melts at the story and gushes over the photos she has.

And everyone gets quiet every time, because no one wants to criticize El, but one time Max gently goes, “You know that’s like….nice right? We’re making fun of him.”

Everyone one expects her to being embarrassed or confused but instead she simple says.

“I know. I don’t like it. Steve’s nice.”

And she embarrasses everyone, except Robin and Eddie who are the only ones Steve never gets upset with when they make fun of him. They all mumble out apologies, and Steve turns to Dustin and goes:

“This is why she gets a special section in the freezer. All different flavors of eggos.”

El’s eyes get wide. “Even the blueberry ones?”

Steve gives her hair a tousle, “Especially the blueberry ones.”

Jonathan was walking ahead of Nancy and Steve, trying to make their way back to Steve’s car in the heavy fog. Steve couldn't help but smile as he watched Jonathan walk. He had such a specific walk that Steve now knew he found cute. His eyes landed on his backside. Yeah, that was also very cute. Steve was quickly taking it all in stride now that he knew that it wasn't just Nancy he was mad for. He felt curious eyes on him, and he looked at Nancy, who was smiling at him in amusement.

"What?" Steve asked.

"Nothing," Nancy smiled.

"No, it's something," Steve said.

"It just looked like you were checking out my boyfriend's ass," Nancy said.

"Maybe I was. It's cute," Steve shrugged. "Never noticed how cute it was before."

"It is cute," Nancy agreed.

Jonathan spun around so fast that he would have fallen if Steve hadn't caught him. Steve grinned.

"Hey, looks like you've fallen for me," Steve said.

"Get off," Jonathan scoffed, but Steve noticed he was smiling. "I would never."

"You'd be lucky, I'm an excellent cook, so whenever you don't want to cook, I'm your man," Steve winked. "Can't say the same about Nancy."

"Oh, God, she tried to cook for you, too?" Jonathan asked.

"I'm not that bad," Nancy laughed.

"Yes, you are," Jonathan and Steve said before grinning at each other.

"It's the thought that counts, Nance," Steve said.

"I have to agree with Steve on this one," Jonathan said. "You can't be good at everything."

"I can try," Nancy said.

"I also happen to give a mean foot rub," Steve said.

"I can attest to that," Nancy said.

"Are you trying to convince me that it's a great idea to fall for you or remind Nancy why she fell for you?" Jonathan asked with a scowl.

"Who says it can't be both?" Steve asked.

"What?" Jonathan asked in surprise.

"Hey, I found my car! Come on, It'd be a terrible idea to drive in this, but we can wait it out inside my car," Steve said.

Jonathan and Nancy slid into the backseat after putting the bags in the trunk while Steve took the driver's seat. Jonathan leaned forward.

"Both of us?" Jonathan asked.

Steve turned sideways in his seat to look at Jonathan.

"I assume that Nancy told you about my little dream with the RV," Steve said.

"Yeah, she did," Jonathan said.

"Well, a few weeks ago, I had another little dream. It's pretty much the same thing with Nancy there, and we're all loaded in the RV ready to go on an adventure, but there was another added detail that I just didn't want to admit has always been there. It's just as important as Nancy being there. . .you were there, too, Jonathan," Steve said.

"Me?" Jonathan asked.

"Yeah, I think you were there for a long time. When Nancy and I were together, I wanted you there, too. I thought it was just me doing it for Nancy, you know, that I wanted you to be my friend so badly that I even tried to invite you to go on dates with us," Steve said.

"I thought you were just messing with me," Jonathan said.

"Yeah, I thought I was, too," Steve said and paused. "I just don't think that I'm ever that lucky to have both Jonathan Byers and Nancy Wheeler fall for me. . .just do me a favor and at least give it some thought before you reject me."

"Uh. . .yeah," Jonathan said softly, sitting back.

There was a long stretch of silence, and then Steve could hear Nancy whispering to Jonathan in the back.

"Well, this is awkward," Steve said as he tapped his fingers on the wheel. "Maybe I should have waited for the fog to lift to say anything."

Jonathan moved forward again.

"So, when Nancy gave you a back rub, did it also always turn into sex?" Jonathan asked.

"Yes! Sometimes a guy just wants a back rub, you know!" Steve exclaimed.

"Excuse me!" Nancy yelled, laughing.

"I know," Jonathan laughed. "What's wrong, Nance? I thought you wanted us to get along."

"Not at my expense, Jonathan!" Nancy said and hit him playfully.

"I just wanted to make it less awkward," he said and Steve laughed.

"Well, it's awkward for me now!" She said.

Jonathan, Nancy, and Steve fell into an easy, playful conversation. Jonathan and Steve continued to team up against Nancy to tease her while she pretended like she wasn't loving it. Eventually, the fog lifted and managed to drive them back to the radio station. They walked into the station with grocery bags in hand and set them on the table by the couch. Joyce and the others spilled into the room.

"Oh, we got back before you did," Joyce said and hugged Jonathan.

"Yeah, your mom was about to send out a search party," Hopper said.

"Oh, we got caught in the fog," Jonathan said.

"That's what I told her," Hopper said. "She kept coming up with awful scenarios."

"Where's Robin?" Steve asked Dustin.

"Bathroom," Dustin said. "How awkward was it - Steve?"

He ignored Dustin, clapping him on his shoulder, and went down the back hallway. He could feel Nancy and Jonathan's eyes on him as he disappeared into the back. Steve followed the hallway all the way to the end and knocked on the bathroom with the special knock he had with Robin.

"Entrevue!" Robin said, and then there was a giggle.

"Doesn't that mean interview?" He heard Vickie ask.

"It does, but it sounds like enter," Robin said.

Steve rolled his eyes affectionately and entered the bathroom. Vickie was sitting on the counter with Robin in between her legs as she braided Robin's hair. Judging by their very pink mouths, they had just been making out. Steve winced.

"I can come back," Steve said.

"We stopped right before you knocked," Robin said. "I know that look, you need to spill your guts. What happened with you, Jonathan, and Nancy? I knew it was going to be awkward. I should have fought harder to go with you. Vickie, my love, you're a beautiful distraction but a distraction none the less."

"You're blaming this on me?" Vickie asked with a giggle.

"Yes, absolutely," Robin said. "It's nice to have someone to blame things on. Let me have it."

"Well," Steve said, closing the door behind him and leaning against the wall. "I told Jonathan that I was just as in love with him as I am with Nancy."

"What?! Why the hell would you do that?! To make it even more uncomfortable than it already is?!" Robin asked, with a shriek.

"I wanted to be honest with him," he explained to her.

"Honest?! Honest with him?! Are you telling me that you're in love with Jonathan Byers?" Robin asked.

"Oh, I see what this is. Are you getting me back for the Tammy Thompson thing?" he asked.

"Tammy Thompson?" Vickie asked, and Robin waved her hand at her dismissively.

"No, this is me asking if you, Steve Harrington, are in love with a man?" she asked.

"Why are you so surprised?" Steve asked. "I told you about my feelings for Jonathan after I had that dream."

"What dream?!" she shrieked.

"Robin, babe, blood pressure," Vickie said and kissed her throat.

"She cares about my health," Robin said as she took a break from her freak out. "She wants to keep me alive."

"Why are you acting so surprised about the dream I had about Jonathan being in the RV with me and Nancy?" Steve asked and then frowned. "I think I might have dreamed about telling you."

Robin ran a hand through her hair, messing up the braids Vickie put in. She took a deep breath as Vickie rubbed her shoulders.

"Alright, so you love Jonathan and Nancy?" Robin asked. "Okay, your poor taste in men aside. . .what did they say?"

"Well, they seemed surprised, but they didn't seem to hate me for the revelation. I just asked them to give it some thought before making any final decisions. So, I have no clue what they think about me wanting to be with both of them," Steve said, looking down at his feet.

"Hey, this could turn out to be a really good thing, you know," Robin said, softly.

"I'm trying not to get my hopes up," Steve replied with a shrug. "But there was this moment, in the car, when we were waiting for the fog to go away, and it was just the three of us. . . It was just really nice and they were both laughing because of me. . .so, even if nothing romantic comes from me being honest with them, I think something good already did. Jonathan certainly doesn't look at me the way he used to, which is good. . ."

"That's a really great way to look at it," Vickie said, beaming. "And welcome to the club."

"Is it a nice club?" Steve asked.

"Oh, yeah, we like to meet twice a month," Vickie said. "And we like to bake. At least, I do!"

"Me, too," Steve grinned.

Vickie hopped off the counter and hugged Steve. Robin let them have their moment before squealing and joining in on the hug. They jumped at the loud banging on the door.

"I don't know what the hell is going on in there, but I've got to piss!" Dustin yelled. "Hello?!"

After that, Steve waited patiently for a response from Jonathan and Nancy. It was too important to rush, he knew, and they both deserved to give it the proper consideration. Meanwhile, they talked, and they didn't stop him from flirting with them. He even thought that they might have been flirting back. It made him absolutely giggle when they both smiled at him at the same time, Nancy's blue eyes twinkling and Jonathan flashing his dimples, dimples that he just wanted to press his thumb into. . . Yeah, okay, he was definitely a freak. Would Jonathan let him do that?

"Jonathan!" Steve yelled.

The three of them had gotten partnered a lot more frequently. Steve wasn't sure if it was random circumstances or if someone was trying to throw them together on purpose. Steve wasn't complaining, especially when they were all three looking after Dustin, who was now possibly starting to pick up on the way Steve looked at the both of them. That's why they were here now, running away from a demogorgon. It always seems like the three of them were running away from those creatures. The woods offered little to no protection, but the demogorgon had cut them off from Steve's car. Now, the thing had separated Jonathan from Steve and Nancy. Steve and Nancy scrambled around the dark for their weapons, but they couldn't wait because the demogorgon had Jonathan trapped underneath him. Steve stood up and ran at the demogorgon, throwing his entire body on top of it, knocking it off Jonathan.

"Steve!" Jonathan yelled.

Steve used everything he had to pin the demogorgon to the ground, but the monster was stronger than he was. Its claws dug into Steve's forearm, and the other one dug into his side. Scraping was the more accurate term. It was still pretty painful. He heard the click of the lighter that Nancy had managed to find, and out of the corner of his eye, he saw a blaze of fire. As the demogorgon flipped him on his back and opened his face, Nancy jammed the flaming bat into its mouth. The demogorgon screamed, jumping off of Steve, and tried to pull the bat out, but its nails had sunk into its flesh very deep. It ran off, running into the trees as it tried to pull it out.

"Steve!" Nancy and Jonathan screamed.

"Our bat!" Steve yelled.

"I'll make us a new one," Jonathan asked as he wrapped an arm around him, pulling him up.

"What else can you do with your hands?" Steve mumbled.

"Let's get you to the station, and you'll find out," Nancy said and wrapped her arm around his other side.

"Why is it always me?" Steve asked and snorted. "I'm lucky, I guess."

Jonathan and Nancy got Steve into the backseat of his car. They quickly put temporary bandages on his wounds before digging into his pants' pockets to fish out his keys. Just as Nancy slipped in the driver's seat while Jonathan held onto Steve, they heard the sound of the soldiers off in the distance, taking out the demogorgon. Nancy quickly drove off towards the radio station. When they got there, no one else had arrived yet. Steve guessed they were still at the hospital. With their help, Steve pulled off his backpack, jacket, and shirt. They yanked him down onto the couch, grabbing the first aid kit.

"Jesus," Jonathan said.

"Oh, this isn't that bad. You should have seen the bat bites and road rashes during spring break. I don't think I'm going to need stitches," Steve said. "Just stop the bleeding and clean the wound, then wrap it."

"Are you sure?" Nancy asked.

"Uh, yeah," Steve said and then he frowned. "Did Robin and I not tell you that we're studying to become paramedics?"

"No," Nancy and Jonathan said.

"Uh, yeah, I figured that since I was getting hurt a lot and we both wanted to find a way to help people," he said. "I'm not even sure that I'm going to get it."

"You're going to do great, man," Jonathan said.

Nancy wrapped Steve's torn shirt around his arm while Jonathan pressed a piece of cloth to his side.

"I can't believe you tackled a demogorgon," Nancy said.

"It was nothing," Steve said.

"Are you seriously being modest about full body tackling a nine foot tall demogorgon? It was impressive, and you know it, asshole," Jonathan said. "I couldn't believe you did that either."

"Couldn't let you die," Steve said.

Jonathan blushed and focused on fixing up his wounds.

"Thank you," Jonathan whispered.

Steve used his free hand to brush Jonathan's hair out of his eyes. He watched as Jonathan's expressions changed as they finished wrapping him up. He looked angry.

"Are you okay?" Steve asked.

Jonathan jumped up and began to pace. Finally, he turned on Steve, his hands on his hips.

"That was completely stupid of you to do that! It was a fucking demogorgon and you went after it like you were playing football! Did you even think about Robin or Dustin or the other kids? You know they care about you?!" Jonathan yelled.

"Like mother, like son, right?" Steve asked Nancy and she snorted.

"Tell me about it," she said.

"Hey! I'm being serious here!" Jonathan yelled.

"I'm getting hints of Hopper now," Steve said.

"Like father, like son," Nancy teased.

"You threw yourself at a demogorgon like it meant nothing. . .like your life meant nothing, and you always do this! I mean, I thought you wanted a future!" Jonathan yelled.

"I do! That's what we're fighting for here," Steve said, bewildered.

"Then act like it! You want the RV, don't you?!" He asked.

"Yeah!"

"I want the RV, too! We want the RV, but we can't have the RV if you're dead!" Jonathan exclaimed.

"What?" Steve asked, looking at him softly.

"I want the RV!" Jonathan yelled, throwing up his hands. "Okay, I want the RV."

Steve and Jonathan stared at each other, Jonathan breathing heavily. Jonathan threw himself onto Steve, pressing him back against the couch. He cupped Steve’s face and crashed his lips to his. Steve responded to the kiss eagerly, running his hands up Jonathan's back and smiling when he felt Nancy's hand join his in tracing a path down Jonathan's spine. Steve broke the kiss, smiling.

"I just want to point out that we can't have the RV without you either," Steve said. "And we're all equally reckless, so I don't know why I'm the one getting yelled at. . ."

"Asshole," Jonathan laughed.

Nancy grabbed Steve’s chin and forced him to look at her.

"You do not have our permission to die, got it?" Nancy asked.

"Got it," Steve laughed.

Nancy kissed him, just as enthusiastically as Jonathan. God. He missed kissing her, and it seemed like she did, too. Their kiss didn't last long before they heard the front door to the radio station bang open loudly. The three of them sprang apart really quickly. The rest of their party all filtered in at once.

"Oh my god! Is that blood?!" Joyce yelled.

"It's not mine, it's Steve’s!" Jonathan said quickly.

"Steve! Why does this keep happening to you?!" Dustin exclaimed.

"He does this to himself," Jonathan said, smiling. "He wouldn't have to do it if it I hadn't needed saving."

"He's fine for someone who full body tackled a nine foot tall demogorgon," Nancy said.

"You tackled a demogorgon?!" Lucas, Mike, and Dustin yelled.

"Yeah, I did do that," Steve said.

"You dingus," Robin said.

"Totally worth it, though," Steve said. "And Jonathan already yelled at me for being reckless."

"Yeah, I thought I heard him yelling," Will grinned.

"Just like his mom," Hopper said. "What was that about an RV?"

"You heard that?" Steve asked.

"It's the only thing we heard. Why does Jonathan want an RV?" Will asked.

"Oh my god! He said he wants the RV?" Robin asked, and then he turned to Jonathan. "You said you wanted the RV?!"

"Yeah, I'm guessing you know what that means?" Jonathan asked with a laugh.

"Yeah, I know what that means!" Robin squealed, jumping up and down. "Vick, he he said he wanted the RV!"

"I heard!" Vickie squealed and started jumping with her girlfriend.

"We both want the RV," Nancy said in amusement.

"They both want the RV!" Robin and Vickie squealed.

"What the hell is this?" Hopper asked.

"Jonathan?" Joyce asked in amusement.

"Oh! I think I know what this is about," Dustin said.

"You do?" Steve asked. "Was I that obvious?"

"Jonathan was so jealous that we stole an RV that he wants to steal one himself," Dustin said, snapping his fingers.

"Jonathan, honey, why do you want to steal an RV?" Joyce asked.

"Yeah, I don't think that's what this is," Hopper said, squinting his eyes at Jonathan. "Son, something you want to tell us?"

"It's nothing bad. We'll tell you later," Jonathan said, blushing. "Let's just get Steve something to eat."

"Yeah, me and Vickie went shopping this time, so you're in luck, Stevie," Robin said.

"Okay, but while we eat, can we please cover up Steve’s tits? No one wants to see that!" Mike exclaimed.

Steve and Jonathan shared a smile with Nancy as Jonathan collapsed on the couch next to Steve. They curled up together as they ate, enjoying the moment of happiness during all this hell. Steve glanced at Jonathan, who was leaning against his arm as he told everyone about how Steve saved him. Oh, how far they've come.

Kinda building a team

Diagnosed with Hanahaki, a genetic autoimmune disease, as a child, Steve has learned to live with it. Along the way, he finds a family and falls in love with Eddie. He is never cured, but he lives.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

The conversation with Jonathan and Nancy couldn't be called easy, but it was manageable enough for Steve to do it at a time that wasn't even planned. Maybe it was the lack of planning that made it easier, maybe it was the practice he'd been getting over the last few weeks. 

Jonathan apologized profusely, for the pictures he'd taken in '83, for the punch, and for having gotten together with Nancy before she and Steve had actually broken up. Nancy was a little more complicated. Her apologies only came after a lot of pointing out, about all the times she hadn't noticed what was going on with Steve, and she ended up feeling so bad and guilty that Steve almost had to console her.

Luckily, Jonathan had the good sense to try to hold back their emotional response for later, and they both tried to act normally. The next time they met, it was impossible for Steve to help but notice how worn out they both looked, with even bigger bags under their eyes than usual. So, they had to talk a second time, just to make sure that no, Hanahaki didn't start because of either of them and with everything related to the Upside Down happening, they were far from having caused his health to worsen.

It was a lie, but there was no point in wanting them to blame each other after all this time, especially just because of Hanahaki. Steve wished things between the three of them had been simpler, but the illness had nothing to do with it. And after all, compared to everything that had happened, it wasn't that important.

In the midst of all this, he kept talking to Eddie. He shared the fact that his parents' marriage seemed to have improved after his mother was diagnosed and he had never been able to understand that.

He told her how his mother seemed like the protagonist of a dramatic movie, always suffering with such elegance. He remembered one week, when she was bedridden at home, he had to get up very early to get her makeup and help her brush her hair, even though a nurse would come in later and do exactly the same thing.

When he asked about it, his mother said, “I don’t want to be seen like that, Steve.” 

At the time, he didn’t understand, but he was happy to be of service. Months later, when he was diagnosed, he remembered that day and was even more confused, because it was so tiring just to exist, how could he care how shiny his hair looked? When his cheeks were flushed and his lips were soft? 

It took him years to realize why it felt so good to try to take care of his appearance when there was so little he could do for his own body. It was comforting.

But he didn’t share that memory with Eddie. Not yet. 

He just kept talking about his parents. About how Mrs. Harrington liked to have romantic dinners regularly and she had mentioned about ten honeymoons. It was one of her favorite topics of conversation, and she especially loved trying new hobbies or even sports during those trips. His father was okay with it, just so she would be happy.

“I don’t think she wanted to be a mother, just my father’s wife.”

“Absurd!” Eddie exclaimed, anger hidden under theatrics. He let go of the steering wheel for a moment before gripping it tightly, pulling the van into the center of the correct lane. That day, Steve had his monthly checkup and Eddie asked to accompany him, promising a movie afterwards, in a neighboring city. “How could anyone choose your father over you?”

And there it was, once again, Eddie’s ability to make the wounds that Steve hadn’t even mentioned hurt less.

“It’s just that she’s always been in love with him. When I was a kid, I thought it was the most romantic thing in the world. I even wanted to have the same thing.” He laughed thinking about the absurdity of it. “To love so much that even if that person made me feel so much pain, they would also make me very happy.” Steve sighed, serious again. “But I still want someone who would stay with me on a romantic night or sleep in an uncomfortable chair in the hospital.”

Before Eddie had time to say anything, he turned up the volume of the music.

A few hours later, he confessed that Mr. Harrington was that person to his mother, but not in the right way. Because he indulged in his illness almost like a hobby, very involved in it until he was not around Mrs. Harrington and something else caught his attention. 

Steve noticed this when his father called and informed him, very casually, that she was in the ICU. He would spend a fortune to make her live well, yet he seemed barely able to realize that her life was in danger.

A few days later, with the test results in hand and feeling stronger, he invited the kids over for a movie night at his apartment. Hopper offered to help tell them and was so worried that he decided to spend the night at a diner when Steve refused. Joyce, less extreme, promised to be just a phone call away. 

Jonathan and Nancy weren’t there, because they all figured the kids would be less upset if it wasn’t obvious that they were the last ones to find out. 

Guys.” Steve clapped his hands together, then put them on his hips, standing in front of the TV. “I have an announcement to make.” 

“Are you serious?” Mike yelled. “We’re here for the movies!” 

“Shut up, idiot.” 

“We’re here for the movies,” Dustin interjected into the fight that was already starting to form between Max and Mike. “But we’re going to listen to Steve.”

“You’d hear it anyway, you know, we have three adults here to keep you brats in check.” Robin stood next to Steve and began clapping her hands until everyone was quiet. “Steve.” 

Then she went to join Eddie, who was standing behind the kids, silent and watchful. 

It was good to have them both there, someone to look at without letting himself be consumed by terror.

“This has nothing to do with the Upside Down, but it’s very important, so I’ve already talked to Hopper and Joyce too and I don’t want you to get upset, okay? I’m going to talk to everyone about this in the way I thought would make this easier.”

At this point, no one seemed more scared than Max or Dustin. Even Mike, who was trying to keep his expression irritated, looked worried and was the only one who had the courage to speak up.

“Why make such a mystery? Just say it.”

“I’m sick. Hanahaki.”

There were no more movies for the rest of the night, just tears, screaming and hugs. Max barely left Steve’s side and Dustin kept checking his pulse, as if he couldn’t see with his own eyes that Steve was alive. They also had to explain Hanahaki to El and she was so upset that she joined Max. Lucas did too, after a few minutes. He and Will were the quietest, looking too shaken to know how to react.

Dustin got irritated and started talking nonstop about the health care system. Eddie, finding resonance in Dustin’s feelings, also started roasting the pharmaceutical industry.

They all slept together, huddled together, in the living room.

In the middle of the night, Mike, having the same thought as his sister, asked if Nancy had anything to do with it and after being assured that she didn't, Steve realized that he would once again need to educate the people he loved about how Hanahaki really worked and about his family.

When everyone finally left in the early evening of the next day, he only had a few hours before he realized that he would probably need to have a walkie-talkie on him at all times, because everyone wanted to make sure he was okay.

The next time he and Eddie were alone together, Steve continued to talk.

It was a little embarrassed that he confessed that, although he had always wanted his parents’ love, he was relieved by the huge distance between them, because he wouldn’t have to worry about being the cause of his mother’s downfall. Because he couldn’t even imagine what it was like to be so loved by someone who had a disease so influenced by emotions. It seemed terrifying.

“I must be very selfish.”

“For wanting to preserve yourself? Everyone wants that, it’s not selfish, it’s human.”

“I didn’t give you that option.”

Eddie grabbed Steve by the shoulders so they were face to face.

“You did. You practically put a warning sign on your forehead. We all chose to stay here. Because you’re part of our lives and we love you, Hanahaki isn’t going to change any of that.”

Careful with every move he made toward Steve, Eddie leaned in until he could put his head in the crook of Steve’s neck, for the first time in a long time looking like he was the one who needed comfort.

Steve couldn’t describe how happy he was that he could still provide that and tightened his arms around Eddie.

“If it were up to me, you know where we’d be right now. You’re the one being so careful about this, so I don’t regret it. Don’t ever insinuate that you’re selfish for allowing us to feel the joy of being in your life.”

Steve didn't know if he could ever stop feeling guilty, but he would try.

One afternoon, when Steve came home from his shift at Family Video, he found Eddie standing at his door, a folder full of papers in his hand. He didn’t say anything, just waited for Steve to come in and followed.

“I did some research,” he announced and waved the papers. “Dustin helped me a lot, because he’s much better at research than I am.”

And Eddie launched into a somewhat confusing monologue about how 4.4 out of every 500,000 people had the Hanahaki gene and only a few of them actually had a real chance of developing the disease, and even in those cases, environmental factors were very important. In conflict zones, for example, the chances of acute and fatal manifestations were up to 300% higher than in other patients. 5 to 10% of carriers would be lucky enough to only have mild symptoms even under periods of intense stress, but without proper treatment, even those people would be at very serious risk.

Almost all of Hanahaki’s patients who survive the first two years require at least one transplant at some point in their lives. He talked about the complications, the lacerations of internal organs, the blood clotting problems, the cirrhosis, the hypertension, the encephalopathy.

“Steve, I said I’d do my research, and I did. I’m not a smart guy, not that smart.” He held up a piece of paper at random. “I’ve never been interested in medicine, and I’ve never been good at science, so there are some things I may not have understood that well, but I’ve learned a lot. I’m not going into this blind. I know what the expectations are here, I’m a grown man and I can make my own decisions. And I want you. I’ve wanted you, somehow, since high school, I wanted you when I saw how the kids adored you, I wanted you when you came to me even though everyone thought I was a murderer. I wanted you when I saw you take off your shirt, when you jumped in the lake, when you fought the Demobats, when you walked with me through hell. When you pulled me out of there. I’ve wanted you constantly, all the time, for all these months.” He took a deep breath. “I want you. I love you.”

Steve knew that no matter how happy he was, there would always be things that would hurt him. He would always have scars on his lungs, roots tangled in his ribs, internal bleeding, shortness of breath, injuries… There would always be a million problems, one after the other. Maybe he only had a few years left.

But Eddie knew that too. He knew that sometimes he would need to take care of Steve, and that he would need to learn to control his anger better, that he would always have to be careful when he communicated a problem, that he would need to offer reassurance and remind Steve that he was loved. He knew it would be hard. He knew the risk of coming out of this with a broken heart.

Even knowing the potential disaster, Steve kissed Eddie knowing it would be worth it.

find me drawing brandless vague-chip looking food and the weirdest arm pose in history (they say write what u know, heh...)