I’m funny
Get up girls we have another day of obsessing over fictional characters to cope with reality ahead of us
update: new fictional character that i find hot is rooster aka bradley bradshaw
went to the cinema with my family yesterday and watched top gun. do not know the plot or what happened i was only interested in this man i was only paying attention to him. sooo horny cause of this guy rn i said what i said
Made some for Tangled!
------- pt2 (final part) (lance, varian, lorbs, adira, shorty)
Lance Strongbow/Arnwaldo Schnitz: he would let out a little chuckle, take your hand, kiss it and say "my pronouns are whatever you want them to be my dear". he would then immediately walk away before you realize he stole your phone/wallet/anything valuable you have on you. but he would only make it ten seconds before turning around, running back up to you, giving you your belongings back, saying sorry, kissing your forehead and then running off again.
Varian: "um well mine are he/him and i find the use of they/them too, anyways enough about me have you heard about this new chemical it is so cool it is called...." he will talk to you about alchemy and chemicals until you leave
The Lorbs: "oooooh ehehehehehe the stupid human is so stupid stupid human you know nothing, you are not on our level, you wouldn't understand. they would continue laughing and walk away. the lorbs are not homophobic, they are just above society. but they will still call you slurs but it would be in a funny affectionate way
Adira: "don't talk to me but if you must, address me as sir"
Shorty: just as heads up, this guy is so out of it, he does not know what is going on at any given moment but is super chill about it. this little guy is in his own world. so when you ask he will be like "oh why yes you can have this cupcake" will proceed to easily pull out a tooth of his, and give it to you
Me: I'm not really horny, I'm just checking tumblr
Also me, ten minutes later: fuck.
------------- pt1 (rapunzel, eugene, gothel, stabbington brothers, captain of the guards, king, queen, cassandra)
Rapunzel: pre tower escape she would say "uhh she/her i think" but after she meets eugene she would say "oh she/they thank you and what are your pronouns?"
Flynn Rider/Eugene Fitzherbert: "your mom but if you really wanna know, im a he/they kinda guy"
Mother Gothel: she would either say "woman/hot" or "hotter/than/you" and then would exploit/womanipulate you into getting what she wants and it would work. she owns you now (sorry i don't make the rules)
Stabbington Brothers: "fuck are pronouns? give us your money"
Captain Of The Guards: "oh i gotta be somewhere" immediately run off to ask Cassandra (his adoptive daughter). 20 minutes would pass and he would run up to you super puffed and say "him/he, do you want some pasta?" but before you can answer he hands you two bowls of pasta, gives them both to you, and then leaves you there with the two bowls of pasta (he is trying but he is also italian)
King Frederic/Rapunzel's Father: he would call you multiple slurs, say "im a man", and then go on a rant about how the world is becoming corrupt because of the lgbt (in much more bad words) . he is homophobic and transphobic. after that he would send you to prison for life just for what his pronouns are
Queen Arianna/Rapunzel's Mother: she would get a little excited and say "oooh she/her/hers". The king would then sigh very loudly and tell her to not entertain faggots and threaten to throw you in prison for life. the excitement would then leave her body but she would also convince the king to not throw you in prison. Idk what she is still doing with the king he does not deserve her.
Cassandra: "why the fuck are you talking to me?" at first she would be so mad that you are talking to her but then there would be a five second silent pause and in a quiet voice would say "she/her/him/his"