Shut Up M'dudes, It's A National Holiday

the beginning of the gang misses the boat is one of my favourites: mac is vibing to hollaback girl, frank and charlie are eating worms, dee has a fake mustache and pretends to be a captain and dennis is applying mascara and then he rides into the river

the idea of Ruth as a trans allegory has me crying in the club

(SPOILERS FOR NERDY PRUDES MUST DIE GO WATCH IT ITS AMAZING)

the idea of discovering something more to yourself that you want to show the world, but feel stuck in what people say you need to be rather than what you really are hits really close to home

Max Jagerman saying “you’re a nerd cause I said so. i willed it into existence.” represents how the more acceptable, “normal” people project what someone is supposed to be onto them without considering what they truly are, to keep them in a box, a box that Ruth is trying to break out of

when Max is presumed dead, it represents those expectations being lifted off of those who were affected, allowing people like Richie to be confident in who they are and make friends

even though Ruth doesn’t know exactly what she is yet, she finds her passion for being in the spotlight at the beginning of “Just For Once”, singing about how she now knows she wants to be in the spotlight

lines that talk about her character growing old, talking about how she’s disappointed with where her life is, maybe reflects how she’s feels about growing up herself, being scared of a future where she has to live as someone she isn’t or with someone she doesn’t want to be with

her repetition of “just for once,” in the song reflects many of the thoughts that other trans people have, often imagining ultimatums like “if only I had a button that turned me into a (preferred gender)” or “if I could just wear this outfit just for one event,” or “if I could just be a (preferred gender) for one day”

“just for once I’d feel the spark that I once knew” reflects feelings of many trans people who realized they weren’t cis around high school, where Ruth is, and searched to find that feeling again, but felt trapped by expectations by parents or others

“should I flip the burgers now? should I double check it’s well done on the outside, not within?” her indecisiveness reflects one of her main character traits, that she is riddled with anxiety, a common struggle that trans people experience, her anxiety makes scenarios that even though people are starting to accept her after Max’s death, that she’d still be ridiculed, or that it isn’t right for her to be who she is

her musicality shows her in bursts of confidence, like at the end with her lengthening the last note and letting it trail off, setting it free, only to go completely silent, highlighting the duality of her confidence in her new self, and fear of change (the last note always kills me it makes me tear up everytime)

what makes it even more gut-wrenching is that she isn’t able to feel the freedom of living her dream

the trailing off repetition of “i used to dance” after talking about giving away her tap shoes, representing her surrender to anxiety and fear, giving up on her dreams of being a performer, before being killed by Max

“Life is fine, if only it were mine.”

Richie headcanons!!

First anime was the Pokémon anime and Naruto

First video games was Pokémon Y

Naruto ran down the halls in middle school

Really likes Final Fantasy VII

Has an Eren Yaeger pfp on every social media site (and it's always different)

Forced Ruth to watch My Hero Academia

Thinks new anime fans are annoying while also really wishing everyone around him watched more anime

Has a list of cosplays he'd like to do, and hasn't done any of them

Has a stuffed animal collection under his bed that he refuses to share with anyone

Owns at least one nendoroid

Has only read manga since 7th grade, other than for school

Collects snow globes from every place he goes

The greatest proof of Macdennis canon isn't all the psychosexual shit the two of them have going on, but the fact that Dee and Mac's relationship is best characterised as "siblings-in-law"

I don't think we talk enough about what Mac falling for Johnny means in terms of his perception of love and his relationship to Dennis. I mean, we talk a lot about Dennis catfishing and e-dating him and the sexual component of it —which gives us plenty to unpack about Dennis' psyche, so it's understandable— but my favorite aspect to dissect is Mac's willingness to "fall in love" with a ghost.

In the episode, Dennis mentions there being texts between them so we know Mac wasn't just talking to a wall the whole time, but he's been stood up by Johnny so many times.. yet he keeps at it, keeps going on errands and to motels just in case Johnny decides to actually meet him this time. He's constantly waiting for someone who never shows up for him, and that's reflective of Mac's entire character. He keeps searching for love and validation from his mom, his dad, Dennis.. and when he doesn't get it, he just keeps on pushing, putting in more effort because maybe this time it will be enough. He holds so tightly onto his faith in god, a being he can't even see or hear, but that represents a hope for eternal love if you do everything right and conform nicely to its supposed expectations.

Mac isn't a stranger to loving distant beings, so of course he fell in love with Johnny. He's so desperate for someone to love him back but the only form of "love" he recognizes is a distant kind. That's why he can't give his date from the episode a chance, and why he doesn't want anything to do with uncle Donald. Easy and earnest love isn't something Mac knows. Hell, it isn't even worth it. Love, in his experience, requires work and sacrifice, otherwise what's the point?

This also plays a lot into his dynamic with Dennis, and why Mac will never let go of it. Sure, we saw him kind of trying to move on in 'The Gang Gets Romantic' by fabricating a love story for himself with Greg, and a more genuine attempt in 'Frank vs. Russia' by dating Johnny, but all roads eventually lead back to Dennis. A part of it can be attributed to Dennis not letting him move on —keeping Mac at arm's length while giving him just enough to keep him hooked— but that's not all. At this point I don't think there's anything Dennis could do or not do to put a definitive end to Mac's obsession with him, because he's exactly the type of person Mac craves in his life. As mentioned before, Dennis is someone that makes him earn his love and respect, and Mac can't find that in other potential romantic partners. He already tried looking for it online, where you can meet all kinds of people from all kinds of places, and who did he find? Dennis.

Obviously, the Johnny thing being orchestrated by Dennis means that Mac "found him" on purpose, but the point here is that Mac didn't know that. From his perspective, it was a fresh start with someone completely new, a guy that met his subconscious requirements. It just so happens that his requirements are Dennis. Because as mushy and gooey as it sounds, at the end of the day Mac is irreversably in love with him. He loves Dennis so intrinsically that he falls for him a second time, without even being aware of it. And I suspect he always will, no matter how many times he tries to move on.

I don’t have twitter, has the person who posted those clips from icbiballtay night 1 posted any more than the ones you’ve linked? And if so, can you pls link them?

:)

Here are all the links!

Land of the Dicks

Orphaned at 33

Listen to Your Heart

Join Us (And Die)

Status Quo

Happy Ending

She’s going to post more later!

just a heads up for all writers out there!

I was recently told AO3 is currently being plagued by bots that comment on people’s works and falsely claim their fics were AI generated. and I can see how vile and discouraging hearing that is for authors who put so much time, effort and dedication into creating their fics.

now listen to me, if you ever get a comment like this on your work, please please please please know that they’re most definitely bot who comments the same thing on dozens of people’s works at random without ever reading the works. at all. they just copy and paste the same script onto random fics, any fic they come across.

they’re bots with malicious intentions, and they most certainly want you to lose motivation and/or delete your works. DON’T GIVE THEM WHAT THEY WANT.

if you ever get a comment like this, just delete the comment and/or report it to AO3.

remember that their comments don’t mean your works look “AI generated”. it only means these bots come across your fic and leave the same copy and pasted comment on it like they do to other writers.

don’t let them make you question yourself. they’re nothing but spam bots. YOU are a writer and you are fucking awesome.

it is so sickening to think about mac's desperation to be loved and how the neediness that radiates from him is ultimately what inhibits him from forming healthy relationships.. the gang is so tired of him constantly questioning his self-worth ("you guys like me, right?") that they've given up on giving him any attention whatsoever ("it's really a cry for [...] attention, [...] ignore those" / "treat it like a baby / "we don't like you either way"). he needs validation but seeks it in a manner that is so off-putting that nobody wants him around. he writers letters to chase utley. he visits his mom and dad, even though they never want to see him. he threatens suicide as a cry for help and is encouraged to follow through. self-worth is in the body, so why doesn't anyone care that he's been working out? he smothers his dog with affection but can't even get it to stay.

can’t justify anymore time on this but i love my babies