Whenever I Read A Memoir I’m Like How Did You Remember All That

cats love tupperware beds

The reading comprehension and overall common sense on this website is piss poor.

love her.

no offense to sharks but they look so fucking stupid. and I'm not talking ugly, I mean they look like they have 2.9 braincells all the time. there are zero thoughts behind those eyes.

" Dark Clouds over the Sea " //© Insel Rügen

It turns out that, rather than space orcs, humans are more like space cats. We believe ourselves to be the best species in the galaxy when we actually are taken care of by more advanced aliens while doing little more than be adorable and destroy local wildlife when left to our own devices.

I think one of the funniest things about the Sabzeruz event is that the devs choose to go with Candace, Traveler, and Paimon having a whole "Ooh, two mysterious men are going into an alley to have a 'private' conversation; they must be bad guys!" only to then go "Oh just kidding, it was only Alhaitham and Kaveh doing typical Alhaitham and Kaveh things."

Except the "Alhaitham and Kaveh" thing in question this time was talking about Mehrak, a sentient robot that Kaveh built using absolutely forbidden technology, and which he then whole-heartedly willed would develop a consciousness of its own, violating one of the central taboos of his nation's governing agency, committing what amounts to an inherent and extreme felony punishable by law.

Alhaitham and Kaveh: Listen, we're not bad guys discussing illegal activity here. We're just two men having a private, personal conversation. Happens all the time.

Paimon, Candace, and Traveler: Oh cool, they're not doing a crime; they're just gay.

But they were, in fact, doing a crime.

jesse don't touch that that's the growth potion i've been synthesi-no jesse DON'T

The principal difficulty of having a Pokémon pick up your groceries for you isn’t getting it to understand the concept of a grocery list, but getting it to understand the concept of capitalism.

One might assume that Meowth is the exception, given that Meowth is literally the capitalism Pokémon; the trouble here is that, while Meowth does understand capitalism, Meowth also understands shoplifting.