Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night

Sirius breaking into James' apartment with the whole gang on the morning of his birthday to surprise him.

Sirius making sure everyone is hidden and quiet when footsteps start to approach from the hallway.

Everyone jumping up and shouting surprise at Regulus of all people, clad in nothing but sweatpants that are a little too long to be his own, with aged and new hickeys all over his neck, chest and stomach that undoubtedly also lead under the tightened waistband.

Regulus screaming in fright and retreating back down the corridor to use James as a wall against the onslaught of questions.

Sirius going mad.

Dude I said this to my friend the other day, ITS EXHAUSTING AND DEBILITATING I simply cannot do it anymore

i feel sick just carrying on with my everyday life as an american citizen. literally all i can do is watch as our whole country burns down, literally and figuratively.

🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

MASSIVE SPOILERS for SOTR but this book made me absolutely feral bc it's not a story just about implicit submission and propaganda, it's also one about the deeply personal cost of resistance and how that resistance is ALWAYS going to fail if you go in alone

haymitch's story isn't a tragedy because he failed to incite a rebellion or stop the games, it's a tragedy because he absolutely could have succeeded if different choices were made by the people around him

there are numerous ways this is illustrated throughout SOTR, but one of the most telling is through haymitch's interactions with plutarch heavensbee, particularly the last few conversations they have in the book, like this exchange during the victor's tour:

Here, both plutarch and haymitch are acknowledging that haymitch was unlucky, which he was, but it also showcases that the CRITICAL thing missing from haymitch's efforts at resistance was support.

(this isn't germane to this analysis but I would like to stress this is plutarch pitching resistance to haymitch pretty much immediately after the capital burned his family alive and poisoned his girlfriend, and I hope at some point during/after the mockingjay rebellion haymitch got to hit plutarch with a shovel)

after his reaping, haymitch is pulled into a plan for resistance by people who provide him with tools, and information, but then, crucially, step back entirely and wait to see if haymitch is successful. Like katniss, they pin the face of resistance (in the eyes of the capital) to haymitch, but make sure they themselves are out of the direct line of fire.

haymitch even points this out during another exchange with plutarch:

In keeping with the main theme, Plutarch's ability to create and distribute propaganda is thrown into the spotlight—as is his deliberate choice to create propaganda for the capital, and not the resistance. Not haymitch.

plutarch could have allowed footage of the true circumstances of haymitch's reaping, his protection of lenore dove, to be broadcast. He could have let the citizens of panem see haymitch lay louella's body at snow's feet, or haymitch running with lou lou's body, trying to protect ampert, or shown any of the other small acts of rebellion haymitch did throughout the book.

But he didn't.

Instead, he gave haymitch tiny hints, spun out just enough hope to ensure haymitch would try to disable the arena. Him and the other "conspirators" like beetee came up with a plan and instead of working alongside haymitch, chose to put the plan's success or failure entirely on the shoulders of a 16 year old kid, knowing full well the price of any failure, and in certain instances, not just failing to support his effort but actively taking steps to ensure nobody is ever going to know about it.

And when it fails, when the games end, haymitch is the one who pays the cost for what the capital sees as individual resistance. beetee and mags and wiress and the other district victors suffer alongside him.

Ultimately, though, as tragic as haymitch's story is, it's also a painful but crucial lesson in resistance. There is no katniss without haymitch. There is no girl on fire without the boy with the flint striker.

haymitch isn't a spark that failed to ignite. haymitch is a spark that people noticed, but nobody fed, and then snow stamped it out. and when katniss comes around, they know enough not to make that same mistake.

taylor swift is for wolfstar. lorde is for jegulus. conan gray is for reg & sirius.

in this essay i will...

at least one time, sirius made a “no i’m sirius” joke and regulus stabbed him.

You, every night.

I feel like Barty would ask Evan the most RANDOM questions at like 3 AM.

Barty: if I died. Do you want them to surgically connect my dick to you? Like do you want my dick for your bottom surgery?

Evan: I don’t think that’s how it works.

Barty:… damn.

*Barty waking up Evan as if he just had a nightmare*

Barty: Do you think my animagus would be a horse?

Evan: Why would it be a horse?

Barty: I’m so scared of them Ev. Please say it wouldn’t be a horse.

Evan:… WHY WOULD IT BE A HORSE?

One more

Barty: When we get married, can Reg be my best man?

Evan: No.

Barty: … oh so I guess we’re not getting married then

Evan: He’s officiating it.

Barty:… fine.

‪a few chapters into sunrise on the reaping and the conclusion I’m coming to is that while katniss keeps *a lot* to herself, 16 year-old haymitch was a chronic oversharer. he dropped in ONE chapter more of the entire district’s lore than she did in 3 books