Ask A Did Sys Questions!

Disordered system culture is:

I don’t have amnesia!

*doesn’t remember things*

*can’t remember not remembering things*

*thinks my memory is fine but really it’s riddled with holes my mind has learned to smooth over, ignore, or overlook*

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i know it’s not their fault and im totally all for redeeming and helping persecutors but GODDAMN some of them make it hard

you know the switching is crazy when you go from paranoid about dying and being extremely depressed and unable to get out of your bed to being extremely restless and motivated and just. hungry.

when you're sleep-deprived, woke up with a nose-bleed, dehydrated, overstimulated, water isnt watering, temperature regulation isnt temperature regulating, your body aches, you have therapy today, two projects are due that you haven't even started, and you have an orthodontic appointment.

What are some of your funniest memories from interacting with your headmates? - Entity

One of the funniest memories from interacting with my headmates would probably be that one time during therapy where some of us just started singing caramelldansen near front. We had to stop and compose ourselves for a moment as the current fronter was laughing their ass off, LOL. Thank you for the question!

Hi guys! How is your life at the moment? Everything is going well, I hope.

hey there! thanks for sending in an ask! all things considered especially due to our current situation and hyper vigilance and such, not too bad. we have a bit of a headache along with a twisted foot, a never-ending appetite, some nausea, and just the usual amount of joint pain with it being a little worse in our back, but all things considered, we’re doing pretty good and we’re still able to function (that’s a fucking win)! thank you for asking. :)

as someone who has been told that their trauma isn’t ’bad enough’ or real by a psychologist, i want to reassure you that your feelings about traumatic memories you may have are valid. the therapist we’re with now supports us and listens to us and our feelings.

after our interaction with that therapist, including several negative events that affected and worsened our mental state, we grew to believe we were delusional, crazy, and a liar. we were terrified to speak to anyone about it because we feared they would call us liars.

it took us months to gather up courage to talk about anything regarding the topic again with a new therapist. it’s honestly terrifying talking about this right now- but we’re working on getting back our progress again, despite our setbacks and the challenges we experienced.

find a therapist who supports and listens to you- preferably one specializing in dissociative disorders and trauma work- not one who fake-claims you because you aren’t extremely overt and because your trauma seems outlandish or unreal. DID is a covert disorder by nature. just because you don’t seem like you have it on the outside, doesn’t mean it isn’t real. in fact, that’s what it’s supposed to do. it takes several months if not years to even get a diagnosis- because of how difficult it is to pinpoint.

a journey to diagnosis is difficult, even if you have the money for it because of the stigma against DID, OSDD variants, and UDDS, and it takes extreme persistence, some may not even want a diagnosis because people will treat them differently for it- negatively. But, no matter what, your feelings are valid. Your experiences are valid. Your coping mechanisms are valid. If you experience it, it’s real. Even if it’s not in a specifically endorsed label.

Only YOU truly know what you experience. Nobody can tell you what you are supposed to experience.

yk that weirdass feeling when you realize you are truly alone outside of your own head???? currently going through that mood lol

Headmate who insists they’re very evil and fucked up, despite being kind and caring

birther after telling us it was all our fault for not watching our cats while we were out with our sibling 🦄🦄🦄🩷🩷🩷🐺🐺🐺 (for reference, our two kitties got into a fight. they were separated and slowly reintroduced after a few hours. no issues since but we’ve been keeping an eye on them. we are aware of the cause and it is a one time occurrence that is easily prevented. neither are physically injured either.) (it was our birthday so we wanted to spend time with our sibling. birther watched us leave. guess who was with the cats??) going to love it when our therapist tells us it’s just how she is and that we should understand her point of view when we meet with them!!! -blurry