Jerry Seinfeld Says That You Could Never Do Seinfeld Today But One Time When I Was Really High I Fell

Got inspired by the multitude of "transsexual Seinfeld" posts I saw

everyone got that one homie who hasn't been whole since the incident

The dynamic of "scientist who wants to fuck the thing they're studying" gets exponentially better the further removed from the biological sciences you get.

Xenobiologist wanting to bang an alien is old news. Give me a programmer in love with his computer. Quantum physicist who gets horny when he gets to operate the partical accelerator. Do you understand

Sunniya

bingewatching will never come close to bingereading. there is nothing like blocking out the entire Earth for ten hours to read a book in one sitting no food no water no shower no bra and emerging at the end with no idea what time it is or where you are, a dried-up prune that's sensitive to light and loud noises because you've been in your room in the dark reading by the glow of a single LED. it's like coming back after a three-month vacation in another dimension and now you have to go downstairs and make dinner. absolutely transcendental

i need a polycule of tall skinny white guys preferably like around 10 of them so i can dress them up in nice outfits and give them cute little red ribbon chokers. (hiding a bowling ball behind my back) For no real reason

“mold is gross!!” “mold gets people sick!!” maybe for you. my mold loves me. we share germs & we arw in love ❤️ he livws on my water bottle and i take him everywhere with me. i am dyinf. for unrelated reasons

I didn't stop to wonder why I was cobbling this together, I just did so mindlessly 😞😞

I literally can't stop thinking about all stars when watching kurtis duo videos and this just fit way too well 💗 so ig this is an all stars youtuber au as if that isn't the most insane fucking thing to happen 😞

Noah runs a couple vlog channel that he manipulates Blake into being a part of ig. idk . I will be boiled