To Be Written

Pansy: Okay, I think I know how I can find out whether Hermione likes me or not. We’re going to a New Year’s Eve party, right? So at midnight, I can kiss her. And if she kisses me back, great! You know? But if she says “Pansy, what the hell are you doing?”, I can say “It wasn’t me, it was New Years!”

Draco: Well, that’s a lot better than Harry trying to kiss me back in Hogwarts, and saying that he did it because he needed chapstick

Harry: ...

Harry: It was a dry day

This footage of Elmo after messing up a take on Sesame Street is peak relatable

harry potter starts a youtube channel and all of his videos are called like:  

“STORY TIME: I WAS A TEENAGE CHOSEN ONE”

 “BABYSITTING MY FRIEND’S WEIRD DEAD HORSE (INVISIBLE)” 

“THERE ARE DARK WIZARDS TRYING TO KILL ME BUT ONLY THREE PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT MY HOUSE”

(first day as a barista)

draco : here’s your coffee

harry : thanks. can i get a little spoon too?

draco : sure

draco, sits on harry’s lap and nuzzles into him : here you go

okay but /listen/ the one thing this fandom doesn’t have nearly enough of is headcanons surrounding the gryffindor boys dorm in harry’s year

like,,,, harry, ron, dean, seamus, and neville… there’s so much potential for wonderful, wonderful headcanons and i feel like we really don’t explore that enough

family dinners

draco: oh grow up POTTER

harry: you’re an annoying little git aren’t you

draco: why you—

ron, to his concerned family: you’d think they hated each other, but they’re actually engaged. crazy fools, they are

hermione, sipping hot chocolate: it’s best to leave them to it…biscuits anyone?

The most hilarious thing about the fact Buckbeak had a trial and lost is that later on JKR resolves the issue by having Hagrid take him in again and renaming him Witherwings. That’s literally all it took. What if in POA, Hagrid simply said, “Sorry, Buckbeak flew away.” 

“There’s a hippogriff right there, Hagrid.”

“A different hipprogriff.”

“I’m… pretty sure that’s the same hipprogriff.”

“Prove it.” 

Repeat after me, kids: your significant other liking multiple genders does nothing to invalidate the fact that they like you best.

James: Hey Remus I need some advice-

Remus, immediately: Don’t ever let a recipe tell you how many chocolate chips to add, you measure that shit with your heart

James: Right, Okay…. See I actually had something else in mind..