Y'all

Y'all

Imagine if Bilbo lost his lil acorn once Smaug was dead.

Throin sees Bilbo looking around all panicked, digging through some pile of gold or gems, and asks about it, and this is where he learns about the acorn.

So of course he offers to help look, while they're looking for the Arkenstone, and eventually they've got the whole company looking for both. Thorin's head seems a little more clear suddenly, so everyone's more looking for the acorn than the arkenstone, because yeah they're looking for the arkenstone, but they'll know it when they see it, they have to CONCENTRAIT to find a lil acorn, and it's important they find IT soon or it'll get crushed, or die or rot. The arkenstone has lasted this long. It'll last a little longer.

And because they've all got he mindset if "yeah thats a bit of gold, but it's not an acorn. Sure sure some pretty gems but it's not an acorn!" In there heads, they stave of the gold sickness.

When Fili shouts, "I found it!" They're all rather disappointing when they realise he means the Arkestone. Thorin pockets it, but they return to their search for the acorn right away.

Then, one day, Thranduil shows up demanding the white gems and Thorin's standing up on the barracks like "Sure, if we come across them."

And Thranduil's like "what do you mean if you come across them?"

"There was a dragon in the mountain for over a century! He wasn't exactly cleaning and we're a bit preoccupied with our own search at the moment! I'll send them your way once we find them! If takes a day or a year, you'll live!" And then he disappears from Thranduil's sight.

Only to reappear after a moment, looking slightly irritated. The hobbit is by his side looking, perhaps hopeful? With a roll of his eyes, Thorin says, bitting out the words like they physically hurt to say "If you would like, perhaps you could send a select few of your most trusted guard, and if they might help us in our search, they can also look for your gems as well?"

Thranduil has never been more caught of guard in his life. Did a dwarf, one whom he'd had imprissoned in his dungeon less than a month ago, just invite his people into his most recently reclaimed treasurey?

"I'm sorry. What?" He blinks up at the dwarf- most elegantly, he assures you.

"Elves have very keen eyes, do you not?" Asks the little hobbit. "We're looking for my acorn, you see, that I got from Beorn the skin changer, I seem to have lost it in the dragon's chase, and we fear it'll be crushed. Throin says your box would likely be in the front of the treasurey, and we haven't searched there yet, though Smaug did follow us through there, so it's a fine place for your people to start. It would be greetly appreciated."

And really. The argument could go on, Thranduil's really not sure he believes there IS an acorn, but if it gets him those damned white gems, fine. He sends Tauriel and her guard, and Legolas volunteers himself.

When Bard shows up asking for aid for the town Thorin throws his hands up. "Your just as bad as the elves! We just got our montain back! Fah! At least you asked for nothing so specific!" And practically chucks a chest full of randomly scooped up gold and gems over at the man. "But if there is an acorn in there, you are to return it immediately!"

There isn't an acorn.

"Why would there be an acorn?" He asks Thranduil that evening as he takes tea with the Elven king who's made camp outside the Lonely Mountain as a statement to the dwarven king he doesn't mean to leave without what's rightfully his, regardless of their compliance.

"His husband appears to be rather attached to it." Thranduil shrugs. "I don't pretent to understand the ways of haflings, but if the hobbit has half so strong a love for that which grows from the earth, as the dwarves do that which is mined from it, and I was a king who'd dragged my consort half way across Middle Earth to risk his life battling a dragon for its hoard, I'd think it wise to have the Mountain turned upside down for one measly acorn as well."

Dain shows up and is about ready to storm the peacefully-aiding-the-humans-at-this-point-because-we're-here-what-else-do-we-have-to-do elves on principle, but Thorin puts a stop to it quick.

It takes Dain a day and a half to realised that Thorin did infact say "they were all looking for an Acorn," yesterday, and several minutes to understand that he was saying "no, we found the Arkenstone days ago," today.

And of course, the orcs and goblins show up and are defeated by the forced of them all, united under Acorn Peace Treaty of 2942

Sadly, weeks go by, and they do not find the acorn. They do eventually find the Gems, and Legolas and the majority of the elves return to Mirkwood, Legolas having made good friends with the Company, especially Gloin (this is a suprise tool that will help him later) but Tauriel remains, and if Thorin wasn't smitten with the hobbit, he might comment on just how close Kili is growing to her. At least she's respectful. Might just teach that boy a think or two. The opposite is, of course, true, and Tauriel becomes just as much a menace as the princes.

As the weeks go by and proper cataloging of the treasury commences, every dwarf who comes to help is shows a picture of the acorn every single morning, and promised a just reward for its discovery.

Eventually, Bilbo has to concede they aren't going to find it, but, well, by then he's not exactly planning to return to the Shire for long enough to care for a sprouting tree.

He does return long enough to stop all his things being auctioned off, no he's not a ghost, thank you very much, and have Bag End transfered to his cousin Drogo and his wife, before setting back out for Erebor with the things he intends to keep.

It's years before anyone thinks of the poor lost little acorn again, decades, infact.

One day, in the early morning of the 21st Durin's day after the reclaiming of Erebor, a dwarf comes rushing from the treasurey to find the Royals preparing for the celebration.

"Is it one of these, your highne- uh, Bilbo, your lost acorn?" He asks, stuttering over the title he knows the hobbit dislikes. "I can't really.... tell them apart."

And Bilbo just blinks, because in the cupped palms of the dwarf's are perhaps 15 or 20 little acorns...

"Where did you find these?" He asks.

"They were in the back."

"The back?" Thorin repeats, then catches himself and shoos the dwarf back the way he came "Show us."

They all- Bilbo and Thorin, the princeses, and a handful of the company who'd been present- follow the dwarf down into the treasurey, and then through the treasurey, past all the neat piles of gold and the many chests of organized gems and stones and all manner of other treasures, until they're presented with a very familiar back door.

Or rather, a hidden passage, tucked away in an alcove, where another handful of acorns' the few the Dwarf who'd brought them the first had likely missed- are scattered about.

"You did... just have the one, right Uncle Bilbo?" Fili asks.

"Or course I just had the one!" Bilbo retorts. "I couldn't have possibly carried that many with me all the way from Beorn's!"

With a resigned sort of sigh, as he begins to piece together the answer to a decades old mystery, Thorin steps forward and follows the tunnel up, up, up, and out of Erebor, the others- save the dwarf who brought them, dismissed by Bilbo with a smile, a thanks, and an oh, no, you may keep those- right behind.

As they walk, the acorns start to increase. Though there's never so many as to begin piling up in the tunnel, by the time they reach the end, the majority of the ground is covered in a solid layer if the little things, and the crunch underfoot as they all emerge onto the ledge which they had all once stood, with batted breath in the moon light as they realised they were at last, truly home.

"Was that here last time?" Kili asked, studying the impressive Oaktree shading the entire ledge that sat in front of the secret entrance to Erebor.

The trunk of the tree was wide and solid, sitting right up against the mountain side, and rather winning the battle of wills against the carved stone architecture of the dwarves. Its limbs grow twisted and wild, up and out in all directions. It's easily 250 or 300 feet tall. There is all sorts of life flittering about in its florishing branches, all covered in brilliant green leaves, and fresh green little acorns.

The growned all around them is covered in acorns as well, so many more than the tunnel.

"No." Thorin says, watching a squirrel dash down from the trunk of the tree, shove several acorns into its cheeks, and dash back up the trunk. "No it was not." He turns to Bilbo, and raises an eyebrow. "Lost it after the dragons chase, you said?"

Beet red and look quite flustered, all Bilbo can manage out is a squicky little "oops."

"'Oops' indeed." Thorin returns, smiling fondly.

More Posts from Plethaid and Others

6 months ago

Rudy and Alejandro a chuck of the time i swear

What do they do to my poor boy Rudy ;-;

bro im so fed up of reading fan fics or seeing art of two characters and one of them just gets nerfed.

Like- WHERE'D HIS MUSCLES GO!? they twinkify him (can i still say this? is this word allowed anymore idk) and the other dude still has his muscles?? WHY!?

or in fan fics, suddenly the guy is a blushing mess and he's supper shy when the guy has legit killed and will kill again or like blown shit up before (can't think of good examples but you get what i mean)

i know people can write / draw whatever they want but can people just accept that you can have two buff dudes without turning one into a ridiculously feminine version of themselves?

Can we just have more gay ships where it's just two bros punching each other and rolling around in the dirt because why tf not?

LET THE BUFF SHIPS LIVE!

2 years ago
Style Swap
Style Swap

style swap

2 years ago

This is gonna sound terrible, but I have never watched the LOTR movies, I got into the Fandom through books.

So today I'm gonna watch the fellowship, extended


Tags
1 year ago

Hey guys, I know no one cares but I decided to let the void know that I have successfully self-regulated myself our of an overstimularion spiral :)


Tags
1 year ago

hiya! ❤️ for the WIP tag, I'd like to know more about the frodo one please 👀

Of course, Its cute one imo. Frodo is tired of Uncle Bilbo being sad, he gets even sadder when he gets letters from his dwarves far away. So whats a faunt to do but go there and let Mr King Dain let Uncle Bilbo visit. And if Frodo is there, Uncle Bilbo will visit, hopefully the dwarves will sotp him grounding Frodo forever, but if Uncle Bilbo smiles, it will be worth it. Snippet:

"Dain isn't the King laddie. He's Lord of the Iron Hills. Dain doesn't live in Erebor.” Balin explained gently.

The hobbit's little face screwed up in confusion. "Yes he does, he's King under the Mountain,  Uncle said so. He said he didn't deserve it, because he did nothing but kill a few orcs at the end. Uncle said he came in and stole Thorin's throne because Thorin was an idiot and went and upped and died." 

Every dwarf in the hall went quiet and Thorin choked on his saliva in surprise. Fili bashed him on the back, not taking his eyes off the tiny child in front of them.

"Lad, is your Uncle Bilbo Baggins?" Balin asked hopefully. The lad nodded his head enthusiastically.

Thorin stood once again and slowly moved forward. "But ... but Bilbo Baggins, Hero of Erebor is dead." He said sadly.

"No, he isn't, he's at Bag End, well, actually, he's probably on his way and really mad at me" the little hobbit answered with a sheepish smile. 

"And why is your Uncle mad at you lad? What's your name too if you don't mind my asking?" Balin asked, gaining the lad's attention again. 

The boy stood as tall as possible "Frodo Baggins, son of Drogo and Primula, ward of Bilbo Baggins at your service" he said, giving a very dwarven bow and then adding quietly to Balin "Uncle said that's how dwarves introduce themselves and we should always be polite because otherwise they might throw your plates and sing daft songs".

2 years ago

we don’t talk enough about the fact that there was a period of time when bilbo was in possession of the one ring, the arkenstone, and a mithril shirt. that’s one hell of a collection and he was most excited about an acorn…

2 months ago

peristalsis

Peristalsis
Peristalsis
Peristalsis
Peristalsis
Peristalsis
Peristalsis

In a bid to escape your own life, you run away to the Scottish Hebrides, seeking utter solitude. Instead, you meet a man who won't leave you alone.

He's handsome, and charming, and unfailingly persistent—and he wears an odd pelt around his waist.

read on ao3

Peristalsis

selkie soap x reader. strangers to "lovers." dubcon. breeding kink. suicidal ideation. self loathing. depression. hurt/comfort. angst. smut. afab reader. post-canon. came back wrong.

one . two . three . four . five . six . seven . eight

Peristalsis

selkie. noun. sel·​kie ˈsel-kē  : a mythical being with the ability to shape-shift between human and seal forms.

plural : selkies also Selkies or selchies.

Peristalsis

commentary track:

original concept what kind of seal is soap? what's up with the pelt in chapter 4?

Peristalsis

bonus material:

pinterest board spotify playlist

9 months ago
He Was Waiting For His Goth Bf To Pick Him Up

he was waiting for his goth bf to pick him up

1 year ago

I think you just invented christianity?

plethaid - ye Olde Koolaid

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plethaid - ye Olde Koolaid
ye Olde Koolaid

haha knives am i right? age: can join the military, cant legally drink

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