Biggest Reason I Make So Many Flop Posts On Here Is Because Everything I Do Reeks Of The Desperation

guys it turns out if you wanna have fun and be a fun and interesting person you like have to fill your day with fun things and not just rotting in your room …… need a moment to process

At the gate for my flight home from visiting friends and there's a woman here with a service Shiba Inu. No pics because he has a Do Not Disturb vest and taking pics of strangers is illegal but I need to stress how ON DUTY this animal is. Ears up. Eyes doing Lazer scans of everything. Examining everyone who passes within 10ft like a security guard. Ass planted on her feet. I have never seen a dog with such intense chivalric guardian energy before. He has tiny eyebrows and they are FURROWED with concentration.

Oh no... My plot... Its disappearing....

Need to actually have a 2 hour conversation with myself to get the plot working again

Zombies reproduce using their teeth.

"a vague disclaimer is nobody's friend"

4x07 The Initiative

Some poor suffering gobs!!

So, India is dying.

Look, I know a good number of you are from the US and things aren't amazing there either, but my country is literally on the brink of collapse. So I'd love it if we could talk about that for a minute.

If you can't do anything else, please just read and reblog.

A second COVID wave has taken out the healthcare system. There are no more hospital beds. There's an oxygen shortage. There's a critical vaccine shortage. The Central Government has thrown its hands up and is passing the baton to the State Governments to do what they can.

There are over 16 million covid cases. A record 330,000 new cases reported yesterday - comparable to the US at its peak. 187,000 dead as of today.

There is no plan.

Mass cremations are taking place. The cremation grounds are running day and night and they are short on wood. People are watching their loved ones die while waiting for a hospital bed, and then they're unable to give them the proper burial rights.

Hospitals are overwhelmed. Patients are being confined, two to a bed. They're the lucky ones.

We are on the verge of people dying in the streets.

This is the second-most populous country in the world. The largest democracy. A country that encapsulates over 15,000 years of recorded human history and has endured everything from famine to invasion to colonisation.

We might be at the end. This might be the thing that does us in.

People are dying.

People are dying.

People are dying and there is no plan.

More good news? Variants are popping up. A double mutation strain has shown up. It is resistant to current vaccines. This will not go away. This is the devastation they warned of when the anti-maskers were out protesting the minor inconvenience of covering their face in public.

My country is on the verge of an emergency state. Our government has failed us. This is as dire a situation as it ever could be.

Look. I don't do much with my life. I write fics, some of you have read them and that's pretty much it. I spend my days with my head in the clouds because that's where I like to be.

But two days ago, my grandmother tested positive, had to be taken to hospital and the ambulance caught fire.

She barely made it to the urgent care she needs.

So, here I am, using whatever meager platform I have to cobble this request together. Because I have to do something.

If you can, donate.

Or spread the word.

Help. Please.

saiki kusuo/hp crossover where saiki is reincarnated as harry potter with all his memories intact, and the “power the Dark Lord knows not” is just saiki’s ungodly arsenal of psychic powers. 

points: 

the dursleys are the worst kind of bullshit saiki has ever seen, and saiki either a) puts an end to it within the first few days, or b) just straight up leaves, no one finds him until he’s twelve and it’s time for him to attend hogwarts 

“you have been accepted into the hogwarts school of w–” [saiki incinerates the letter in his hand and goes back to reading his book] 

saiki’s greatest ambition in life is to live a perfectly normal, unassuming, peaceful, boring life. an ambition so great it immediately lands him in slytherin. 

saiki finds himself saddled with every awful “chosen one” trope that has ever graced the earth. he thought being the protagonist of a gag manga was bad but this is worse

this is so much worse, he can’t even play along with the narrative anymore. he is going to turn this into a comedy if it kills him

saiki surreptitiously solving the problems of everyone around him. finding neville’s toad. making sure people’s potions don’t explode. dragging draco malfoy’s broom back down to earth when he tries to show off during the first broom riding class. saiki is not going to tolerate any bullshit and he most certainly is not going to tolerate anyone trying to go into the third floor corridor

and you know what, since quirrell and voldemort are apparently sharing a body (which – how, actually, it’s so disgusting he doesn’t want to know–) he might as well take care of the problem within the first week of school 

voldemort shows up again second year. WHAT THE FUCVK

all of his dorm mates are intolerable, and saiki very quickly figures out a system where he will pretend to go to sleep in his dorm, but then he just teleports to an unused hufflepuff dorm and enjoys himself greatly on his own. a triumph. a triumph slightly ruined by the house elves knowing he’s there, but a triumph nonetheless. 

“but it’s impossible to apparate within the hogwarts castle!!” saiki stares hermione dead in the eye and then teleports anyways 

saiki is very carefully mediocre in every single one of his classes in an attempt to kill any notoriety that comes along with the name “harry potter.” except potions class, because snape always gives him a far worse grade than he deserves and saiki is a mean and spiteful soul. saiki makes a point to be the best god damn potions student that snape has ever had

fred & george weasley catch saiki doing something ridiculous with his powers, and they’ve been bothering saiki ever since. saiki is full of regret 

fourth yr: saiki stays far far far away from the triwizard tournament. he is perfectly happy when cedric is elected, and claps enthusiastically. the goblet of fire turns blue. it spits out his name. saiki is so furious the goblet of fire cracks in half 

but the most important part of this au is 

saiki with a wand 

he doesn’t even need a wand he’s just pretending to use it 

someone: augh, this levitating charm is so difficult! how does anyone do it?! saiki: 

this au is 9x better if you imagine that saiki doesn’t even have magic powers – he just has psychic powers, and he’s very good at pretending he has magic. except transfiguration, everyone thinks he’s a bad student cause he has never done a transfiguration spell in his life – but hermione is convinced he’s some kind of secret genius at wandless magic because she caught him levitating a book to himself in the library once. saiki has deliberately failed every magic task appointed to him in front of her since. hermione is convinced saiki is spiting is spiting her specifically by not doing well in class. she’s right 

EVEN MORE HILARIOUS TO CONSIDER: saiki doesn’t even bother pretending he has magic, he just shows up to hogwarts and never says anything and never talks to anyone else, he turns in impeccable classwork and homework, but he never performs a single spell because he doesn’t see the point. it gets to the point where the teachers are genuinely worried he might be…. perhaps… a squib? is he a squib? 

saiki figures it would be really troublesome to let this go on any longer, but he is also extremely against saying anything out loud ever, and he is also extremely against showing any wordless or wandless magic because who knows what kind of attention he’ll get then 

cue incident in class where a student’s spell goes wrong, badly, and everything is in chaos, and saiki is so tired he decides, fuck it, he does not want to deal with this today, and he uses his psychokinesis to forcibly subdue everything that is going wrong. he’s in the corner of the classroom, so he thinks he’s safe & no one will notice – but nope. professor flitwick noticed. professor flitwick is staring at him with starry eyes. god damn it 

saiki briefly considers erasing flitwick’s memory of the event, but, well, if flitwick tells the other teachers about what he saw then no one will wonder if saiki is a squib anymore. probably. 

but you know what would be great? if everyone thought saiki was a squib and he got fucking chosen by the goblet of fire. everyone riots 

there are so many good things that could happen when you combine saiki’s deadpan self + sheer OP ability with the entire ridiculous hp universe and i love it

you want me to have sex?? the thing that killed julian fawcett?????