My Self Discovery Journey Is Off To Like The Most Insane Start?? The Universe Has Really Decided That
my self discovery journey is off to like the most insane start?? the universe has really decided that now is the time i finally get my shit together and be the person i only wished i could be. the coincidences are starting to feel more like fate. i want to talk to the Gods quickly on the subject and make sure that i am on my highest path,, but i think i’m really doing it guys. i just read the most empowering book about the universe and power of belief. i have the will, i just have to start to believe.
like the random compliments i’ve been giving are coming easier, enjoying my days and finding the good is still tough but i’m getting there, the last step is realizing that i am not what my father thinks i am- which will hopefully come faster than i could ever expect.
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notes app ramblings
god i just feel so fucking empty. i wish i could just like actually be able to make friends so i don’t have to be alone all the time?? but making friends as an adult is stupidly hard.
tbh i should just go back to being a fanfic writer, i had so many online friends back then it was crazy lol
currently trying again tonight to open my frozen over heart, wish me luck
pink bath, pink wine, pink vape, pink girl
i love car rides for the same reason i hate them; they give me the perfect space to finally think. today i’m wondering if 0.5/2 parents is really all that much better than 0/2.
atleast the 0 can’t disappoint you ig.
to my mother who won’t read this: honestly fuck you.
all i can do is pray, so i do. but god does this hurt.
:/ both splitting on people and stockholm syndrome are so fucking stupid. i want to rip my ribs off one by one and throw my heart at the wall and just watch it splatter.
i’m going to start screaming and crying pretty soon. like i am so SO tired of caring SO much for people who don’t even have the courtesy to officially end things.
i just keep getting abandoned over and over and over again and i will end up in the psych ward oh my god.
✩ 21 ✩ bpd, bipolar, & cptsd diagnosed ✩ helpol ✩ “Freedom is a length of rope. God wants you to hang yourself with it.”
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