Sachiel I Won’t Chase You, I Don’t Want To Scare You Off. Just Know That I Miss You, And I Don’t

daniel once again reminds me that i am evil, literally his exact words tonight. what he doesn't know is that my buba is teaching me the power of belief and that i will brute force this into existence that i am good and kind and sweet and nice.

she and her books also say i need to forgive him, i don't know if i ever can.

this whole being 14 thing is so lame. like girl get a grip that was 5 years ago.

i did the “safe space” emdr coping mechanism w my trauma therapist today and i literally just used a spare room in the men of letters bunker. like i didn’t have a real life safe space to imagine, so i had to think of a fake safe space, and i couldn’t think of anything safer.

thank you spn, for always being my home.

i will never admit this fact to anyone ever, the internet can know tho.

i also miss this girl who i loved with my absolute everything i had in me but i can’t ever write about her, the loss is too much, the gap between us feels too big,, i don’t know where to start with her- i never did. but Gods above that doesn’t mean that i don’t miss her often. i tried reaching out first but idk, don’t have the confidence to try again. i got angry with her recently due to my idiot boyfriend not explaining a situation well, and i always having a worse bark than my bite.

she was more than all the moons and stars in the universe, how could i ever not miss her? my absolute other half, twin flame, soulmate, my person.

I can always kill myself. That's the only comforting thought I have.

This is the most in-your-face sign i have ever received in my time devoting myself to the Gods. I’ve gone to school here for two years, never have i seen any birds sit on that building (i’m a big bird watcher on campus), let alone like 30 giant vultures.

I see you Ares!! Our Gods are good :)

Worship Wednesday

Hermes Epimelius, Keeper of the Flock. Hermes' shepherd aspect is one of my favorites. There's strong comparisons to the Great Shepherd. He guides the flocks through their journey, watching out for them as they go. He watches out for us in a similar way. There have been many times he's guided me through my life, assisting me in progressing through it. Hermes Epimelius cares for all of his flock. Not one member goes unnoticed. He's always looking out for danger. And while he won't always protect us from everything, he won't let us go through anything he knows we're not able to handle. He will step in if the danger becomes too great. He loves his flock and wants to see them succeed.

This week's question: Have you ever been through a time in your life where it was clear Hermes was guiding you through it?