They Honorably Discharged Me From The Army And Gave Me A Purple Heart After I Was Hit By A Cumshot

i love the x files

if ……. if a demon wore heelies on consecrated ground, would it still burn them

If you ever find a pool of your own blood, please don’t lie down in it! A lot of people are found dead that way.

Public Health & Safety

god today i ID’d an old dude buyin booze and he pulled out a fake ID with an elvis pic, then laughed and pulled out a matching one but with curly from three stooges on it, and im like okay please and he finally pulled out his real license and his legal name was steve sinner

i need this