Eddie Graduates, Finds Himself A Shitty Job That He Keeps Getting Promoted At, And Now He’s The Manager.

“…why?”

“I’m telling you, they make the best bread I’ve ever had in my fucking life.”

“Can I help?”

“So you’re a villain, but you only want to take over this small village?” “Yep.” “You don’t have any plans to take over anywhere else?” “Nope.”

Destroy all the bots, except for the haiku bot. That one gets to stay

Something i find hilarious about the bats is the fact that all of them - though some do it more (Bruce) - will double down when they realize they're actually wrong.

Kon: *Clearly frustrated and annoyed* "God you're ridiculous sometimes, Tim! Penguins do not eat other birds!"

Tim: "You can think that, but you're wrong."

Kon: *appalled noises as he storms out.*

Damian, who walked in at the end"..."

Damian: "Drake, do you really believe that penguins eat other birds? That's incredibly idiotic."

Tim: "Oh. Yeah, no, i immediately realized i was wrong the minute it left my mouth, but Kon laughed at me and called me dumb and I was NOT letting him get away with that."

Damian: "Tch, that's so immature."

Tim: "Oh, so you're going to tell Jon that you actually can't breathe under water for a half hour and you meant to say a quarter of an hour?"

Damian:"..."

Damian: "Point taken."

Jason: *Watched the whole argument like it was a TV show* "Really, it's the responsible thing to do. If we admit we were wrong about one thing, they'll think we're wrong about other things when we aren't."

Roy and Lian go away for a week and Jason gets lonely so he goes to one of CatWomans safe houses.

Selina walking in seeing a six foot beefy ass Jason playing with one of her kittens: Hey…

Jason: Sup

Selina: Is Roy out of town?

Jason petting the loudest orange kitten she has: Yeah how’d you know

Jason: Hey Dick. Wanna see a butterfly?

Dick: Yes.

Barbara: No!

Jason: *throws a stick of butter across the table*

Tim: Fucking majestic!

If you get it, you get it.

Maybe there’s someone in this abandoned clown factory who can help us

fic where steve already knows he's bi but robin keeps trying to tell him. steve's known he's had a crush on eddie for months at this point but today just happens to be the day where eddie walks in during a slow shift at family video and robin looks up at the perfect moment to catch steve's soft, dopey smile.

and in that moment, robin connects the dots. the music in steve's car being just love songs on loop. steve walking into work in a lovesick haze. steve going out of his way to work his schedule so he could always be the one to pick the kids up from hellfire.

oh.

oh.

eddie ducks into the horror section, and robin throws her full body weight towards steve, who yelps not unlike a stray cat.

"you like eddie," robin hisses.

"yeah, no shit!" steve reaches for the collar of his polo like he's clutching imaginary pearls. "jesus christ, robin, what the fuck."

ignoring him, robin continues. "no, steve," she says, soft look on her face, "you like like him."

steve frowns, nodding slowly. "i-i know that, robin. we're not in third grade anymore, you can say 'crush', it's not going to give you cooties," he says, frown falling to reveal a teasing look.

"wait, what?"

"robin, did you...?"

they stare at each other intensely for what could perhaps be aeons.

"YOU NEVER TOLD ME-"

"I'VE ALREADY TOLD YOU-"

It's a pretty sweet headcanon that Bruce has photos of his kids that he keeps with him at all times, in his trusty bat-wallet in the trusty bat-utility belt, but the story of how he got those photos is probably even better

Like, baby robin Dick was swinging around one day, and flipped right into Bruce's arms who was anxiously waiting to catch him(new parents smh). Alfred took the picture sneakily, because it's hard getting the hyperactive child acrobat to ever stay still

Jason's photo is the one that they took at the courthouse when Jason was officially adopted. He has a gap tooth and is smiling widely at the camera, adoption certificate proudly displayed in his hands

Tim's photo is one that Bruce found in tim's old camera while going through it, and one rare Tim selfie popped up, bowl cut and all. He's holding up a victory sign while discreetly trying to pose in front of Batman and Robin

Cass' photo is one that Alfred clicked, she's fast asleep next to Bruce on the sofa, tired after patrol, their expressions and postures identical, biological child both in and out of the costume

Duke's photo is one that he had before being adopted into the Waynes, when his parents had taken a photo of him shaking hands with Bruce Wayne, for a fundraiser photo-op that Bruce was doing. Duke looked so excited and happy in it, that Bruce demanded a copy for himself

Damian's photo is the one which him and Bruce took for a 'Bring your kid to work day' very soon after Talia dropped him off at Gotham. His and Bruce's relationship is still a little rocky, but the way Damian was subtly trying his best to copy Bruce's stance in the photo made it's place in Bruce's wallet permanent

I hc Dick will be non-verbal for a bit when Bruce first adopts him