I Think I Remember Him Being Better In Later Episodes, But By God Do I Hate Season One Ares. He Gives

cats being capable of understanding accidents and even giving you a little head bonk to let you know you're still cool makes it infinitely funnier that they don't understand when you're trying to help them

cats when you step on their tail: i'll admit that was rather ouchie, but given the lifetime of goodwill and trust between us, one must conclude this booboo is but a fluke.

cats when you try to get their claws unstuck from the couch covering: this nefarious bitch has never had a single honorable intention in their dishonest and shameful life, this must be one of their sinister plots or perhaps even an attempt on my life,

mdzs au where everything is the same except jiang cheng calls wei wuxian “edge lord” during his yiling patriarch era

Nea: you look nice. Who dressed you, the Great Depression?

Cross: you look lonely, Nea. I’m so sorry I couldn’t attend your funeral 35 years go.

Allen: The enemy of my enemy is my friend? No, the enemy of my enemy is also my enemy.

Allen: They are fighting over who gets to kill me, though. So it does give me time to escape.

paranormal investigator but the ghosts are the clients

I haven’t read the alma karma arc recently, so I could be entirely off base, but does anyone else think that the second exorcist experiments might have been trying to recreate what happened with past!allen? like I don’t remember if there was a given reason/inspiration beyond “need more soldiers, why not revive old ones,” but the basics seem rather similar to me.

a person is revived after being killed (or as good as) in the body of a child with no concrete memory of who they were before (or so I assume in allen's case but that could have happened later).

injuries are unnaturally healed by using the helix of life—in the second exorcists’ case by taking it from their future/lifespan and for allen using someone else’s life.

I think the timeline might match up, too. I don’t know exactly how old allen starts out as, but we do know that present!lavi is older by like 3 years. I think allen looked between 5-8 (terrible at estimating…), so if we go short, that’s ~8 years for the final result to be revealed to apocryphos. And kanda’s been alive for 9 years chronologically, which would put allen’s age at like 6-7. That seems like adequate time to get weird fantasy sci-fi experiments up and running.

and with the way apocryphos was looking at that light cocoon allen was in, I wouldn’t be surprised if he took some inspiration, one way or another.

I know we all make fun of Cale for sabotaging his own slacker life, but honestly given his life experiences, it kind of makes sense.

Beyond the obvious fact that he’s a good person who’s going to help where help is needed, it was also his responsibility to do so for around a decade.

Like, I’m pretty sure one of the reasons he gives for why he needs to do all this is because conflict would inevitably reach his doorstep and cause issues for him. In the shelter before he joins team 1, he wasn’t actively involved in the fighting… then the fighting came to him, destroying the shelter with massive amounts of casualties.

And unless I’m misremembering the side chapter, he did try to take a day off as team leader krs (for cjs and lsh’s death anniversary)—and then the company called him in to deal with a crisis.

So his life experiences do kind of align with the “I have to fix everything before I can have a day off” mentality

god rest his soul. he’s not dead, he just needs a break and only god can get him out of that shituation.

please god, put him down (for a nap)

wei wuxian 🤝 cale henituse

cottagecore farming retirement fantasies