You tell me
Your username is now your superpower in the next comic book alien zombie nuclear appcalypse. How fucked are you?
Thinking about an AU where Techno, Wilbur and Tommy are all the harbingers of the actual entire apocalypse and Phil (just some insane guy) decides that those are in fact his kids and starts gaslighting the absolute shit out of them about it.
Rambles under cut!
I wanna try something where they're just more insidious and passive killers than anything else, theyre mostly just biding their time and watching as wherever they're lingering around gets sicker and just starts withering away.
They're a slow moving threat that just can't be stopped and for some reason (because Kristin thinks its funny) Phil just isnt affected by them.
Phil: Oh Techno's always been like that ever since he was a baby Techno: I have literally never met you a day in my life Tommy: Idk man... you have always been like that Wilbur: Oh my death he's actually getting to us
Its a mix of that combined with that "how did he know I was a gemini" meme
Phil: Wil! I brought you some salmon, I know how much you love it! Wilbur: How the fuck did you know I like salmon Phil: I'm your dad silly, of course I'd know :-)
I just think itd be super fun since Phil in this au is literally just some insane dude. He literally lies about their entire childhood but does it so consistently and so realistically that it throws them off guard.
I also have a few ideas where they start referring to Phil as their dad in the beginning as a sarcastic / mocking thing but accidentally just getting themselves even more adopted as they do it.
Phil: Wilbur put on a coat Wilbur: I don't need one! Techno: Go on, Wil. Listen to dad Wilbur: Ugh fine. Only because dad wants it, though
Stranger: Whos this? Tommy: Oh thats our dad. He kinda just tags along Stranger: Aww thats so sweet! You got his nose and everything Tommy: I- wh- no he's not actually our da- Phil: I know he did! Isn't he the cutest, spitting image isnt he? Tommy: You're not my dad! Stranger: Oh someones embarrassed! Phil: Yeah he's going through a rebellious phase right now
Just a mixture of things like that where it starts as calling him it but then accidentally actually giving him parental authority along with that.
I also wanna explore how Kristin and Phils relationship would be like. Maybe her as death being very bemused by this silly human that just decided she was his wife one day.
She literally visits him in dreams and stuff and he just acts as if they're married and have been for years. He complains about their 'rambunctious kids' and how he has to threaten them with her so that they behave sometimes. She finds it so silly and just cant help but play pretend.
Kristin: Hello, human Phil: My love! Its been so long since I've seen you Kristin: We've never met Phil: Oh don't say that! It hasnt been that long. I've just been far too occupied with our boys to visit too much Kristin: Our boys? I made them Phil: And they came out beautiful! I'm so glad Wil and Tech got your eyes. I was hoping they would.
I think that'd be a core part of this AU as well. Everyone is playing pretend but then it just fuzzies and it all becomes real for them. At first its a joke that Phil is her husband and their father but then they get lost in the fantasy and fun of it all and actually accept him as such.
Phil has no ulterior motives either, he's literally just a strange insane man that heard stories about neotrio and started thinking they were his kids one day. He genuinely believes his delusion and they end up accidentally making it a reality.
He just makes lucky guesses and plausible lies often enough that he's still shiny and new, he's still fun to play with and thats what ends up 'tricking' them all.
best depiction of the batfam will always be "You grew up to be the person who would have saved you" but it applies to them each respectively and that's why none of them can see eye to eye and also get up their own asses about things and go to such great lengths to defend their personal brand of justice. Because they can never stop trying to save themselves from their own history.
🇨🇦🇺🇸pookie days
I think that instead of being super apprehensive about Jason and him dating Roy, Oliver should take one look at him and then one look at Bruce and go oh, I'm about to be so annoying.
Oliver starts being so nice to Jason. So nice. Inviting him to family dinners. Giving him both his hero communications and personal phone number and telling him to call whenever he needs something. He gives him new tech and keeps updating his weapons and armor. He helps with missions and clean up and says nothing if Jason is a little rough, apart from patting him on the back and saying good job. He starts keeping his picture inside his wallet and has other pictures of Jason, Roy and Lian framed in the house and tells everyone about him. He starts calling him son-in-law first and then just son and then calls him a Harper and eventually a Queen.
At first it was just to annoy Bruce, but after the first time he tells Jason that he did a good job and Jason starts to tear up a little, Oliver goes oh no, oh I'm actually doing this now. This my boy now. I don't care if he and Roy break up or something, this is my boy now.
Bruce still thinks he's just doing it for the sole purpose of pissing him off, though, and he is so fucking mad. The Justice League meetings have turned into a Cold War zone.
Bruce starts to being so nice to Jason as well, forcing himself to ignore some of the more outrageous things Jason does, and Jason is so, so fucking confused.
The Batfamily, by proxy of being raised by Bruce (undercover pro, lies every other word) and Alfred (actor in another life and in possession of the world’s blankest poker face), are probably the best at just running with something (a con, a secret identity, an undercover job, etc) and acting it out 100% believably. With zero hesitation.
Someone runs up to Red Hood one night in an alley and says “pretend to be my boyfriend! please, he’s following me!” and suddenly that’s not Jason Todd, Crime Lord. That’s Todd from the upper east side, and what the fuck man? leave her alone, you’re fucking tripping!
Etc etc.
Dick's cackle scares the shit out of everyone— and by everyone, I mean EVERYONE.
Imagine Jason, just minding his business and Dick is there too, on his phone, watching something when suddenly Dick starts cackling at something he saw. Jason got a whiplash as he turned to Dick, a horrified expression on his face. He is so damn close to dumping Dick in a pool of holy water.
Or Batman is fighting some goons with Robin!Dick and he starts cackling as he takes down goons. Bruce had to stop himself from flinching at the sound of his ward's cackling.
Dick also have managed to scare Tim, Steph and Duke— even Cass and Damian. He practically scared everyone at this point, including his own friends who have heard his cackle for years now.
And when whatever Rogue hears the iconic Robin/Nightwing cackle, they're definitely running away because no way are they going to be fighting the creepiest Robin.
Edited: also yes, this is inspired by YJ Dick because I love him.
⭐ 🥺👉👈?
the twins are my fave gjhsjkgh
Headcanon that the real reason all the other Justice Leaguer's avoid Gotham is because there is a running joke with the Gotham press that every hero in Gotham is either Batman, or a Robin.
Superman stops an attack drone from burning down a city block?
NOPE! News headlines read "Is Robin's new ability to fly proof he's really a vampire??"
Black Canary busts a smuggling ring?
"Batman's second female Robin. Will she last longer than the first?
Green Arrow catches a bank robber?
"Green Robin's facial hair and exactly what citizens think about it, page 3."
I would love like to instantly know someone’s motive for murder
like
I don’t get to choose who but I look at someone and I instantly know what it would take for them to commit murder
If you were in raincode, NOT your oc, YOU, what would your forte be? Mine would probably be invisibility
A fanfic idea:
Bruce was able to rescue Jason before he died, and after this experience, Jason stopped being Robin.
He became afterwards the golden child, he goes to college (with a scholarship), helps out in the city library, teaches children (helps with their homeworks and helps them to study), works part time in a car garage in crime alley, and is a supportive brother.
And it pisses his siblings off.
Because there has to be something fishy because no one, really no one, is that perfect.
And there is something fishy.
He is also Red Hood.
No one knows, and the vigilantes never talk to Jason about "the family business" because he needs to concentrate on his studies and other stuff.
So imagine, Batmans suprise when the JL was able to catch Red Hood.
Someone takes Jasons helmet off in front of Batman, Nightwing, and other members
And Jason, who wears also a domino mask, doesn't look Batman in the face even as he says :
"Hey Dad. I can explain."
And Dick loses his shit, he laughs so hard because, Jason, The golden child, the one who gave up on being a vigilante, who reads to children in the library, is a goddamn crimelord.
Bruce just stands there frozen because wtf Jason?!
And Dick takes selfies with Jason being tied up and calles the other Batkids in because they should definitely not be left out of it.
(Edit: As someone who doesn't really write (or can write good stories), I want to say, feel free to use this prompt for a fanfiction. Just please give credits to me (because I don't know if someone else had also this idea and posted it) and please inform me if you publish something (because I want to read a fanfiction like this too))