HE’S GOT THEM ON TONGUE AND EVERYTHING XD

x

This is a redesign of an old piece i did 2 years ago now. I have no idea why the quality has dropped so much but if i find a solution i will repost.

This has no business being that fucking wholesome 🥺

Sometimes even the happiest of people can be sad.

Okay so we know, thanks to some pictures of the deleted “crowley trying to sleep on the wall” scene, that Crowley actually sleeps in like a full pajama set (black silk!) which is totally contrary to most of the fandoms headcanons of him sleeping naked/mostly naked.

SO, may i proposition the fandom for a new one?

that it is, in fact, aziraphale, who sleeps in the nude.

and probably takes up the whole damn bed like a starfish.

and has the sheets and blankets chaotically twisted and mostly pushed off.

meanwhile crowley is in his cozy and modest jammies, tucked in all nice and neat beneath the blankets, probably taking up as little space as possible.

i take criticism in the form of fanart kthanks

some hankcon doodles from my twitter u_u)7

Me but when my cat decides to step on my face while I’m trying to sleep for college I’m the morning 😔

my cat, walking on me for cuddles, putting all her weight in one tiny paw: big steppy !!

me as she pressure points my throat:

The Emperor's timeline

or: im so normal about this illithid. wait, no come back-

balduran is fucking around and comes back with a shitton of gold. builds a gate for the port. that becomes baldur's gate

balduran leaves for another expedition. shipwrecks on the way back

werewolf island

goes to moonrise towers because the bitch is obsessed with fame and fortune. a true adventurer

gets caught by a fucking illithid colony and infected.

spends 10 years under the control of the elder brain there

ansur shows up and saves him with the power of bronze dragon dick love and friendship

ansur tries to find a cure no matter what. balduran is an anomaly, having kept the memories and personality of who he was prior to the infection, something that just. does not happen. ever.

balduran is like. fine. with being an illithid. ansur isnt.

ansur decides to mercy kill balduran in his sleep. balduran kills ansur in self defence

balduran makes a life in baldur's gate, and basically since he HAS to eat brains in order to survive, he "eats criminals' brains"

i think thats how he got involved with the knights of the shield, a neutral to lawful evil organisation that controls the interests of rich and powerful people

stelmane, a devil worshipper of Gargauth's cult (aka an archdevil turned deity of evil, corruption, trickery, greed and envy) was leading the knights of the shield. that was before he started controlling her

balduran, as an illithid would, developped a weird sort of. pet fondness for his thrall. which makes honestly that whole thing so pathetic. but she was an evil devil worshipping politician so it was a girlboss move of them actually-

balduran gets captured by gortash sometime during gortash's rise to power / setting up of the absolute plan. i think it's around when stelmane started getting worse - a note in an aide's journal marks that she got worse when the "strange visitor stopped coming to see her"

balduran is now under the control of the elder brain again. who is so so so pissed at the Chosen.

the Absolute Nether Brain sends dreams of the Astral Prism to the Chosen, so they get worried about it and want to send someone to find it (hence the cultists on the ship)

the Nether Brain sends him specifically to the strike team on the nautiloid

the Chosen also make a deal with Sharr about helping them retrieve the Astral Prism. sharr double crosses them. that's how shadowheart gets on that thing

that nautiloid is the one the game starts on, escaping from the githyanki after stealing the prism

balduran/the emperor sees an opportunity for freedom and just fucking hides inside the Prism

he’s very DEMURE 💛

edit: NOOO I FORGOT THE SCAR

8 out of 10 fights in the Oshun Oxtra are Joxter’s fault, but he doesn’t mean it most of the time.