Fine You Can Bully The President I Heard He's A Hater Anyway

fluffy and/or aftercare darkhumor headcanons,? sorry, had a rough day and need something to feel better

darkhumor anon

Here ya go!

● Jay tries ta get surprises for Shade but gets so excited bout it he always blurts it out forgets he did and Shade always acts surprised at the gifts

● Shade loves getting Jay flowers only fake ones otherwise Jay will accidentally kill them and Jay likes the fake ones better

● They play agure over movie scenes a lot but always end up laughing

● Jay tried showing Shade how ta kint but somehow Shade got tangled up in the yarn Jay has a picture of it as his phone home screen

● The two immediately take a bath after sex washing eachothers hair and backs

● They have matching robes they wear cuddling and having hot chocolate

● They always tell each other how well they did during sex filled with praise and love

● When they wake up whoever topped makes breakfast in bed for them

Dad Oz

Requested by:

Justinuse

TWS:

None

Oz slid a piece of paper over to Logan who looked at him confused Oz pushed his glasses up smiling at the young boy

He had noticed how little Logan's mom's were around and looked into it Oz didn't like what he found so his going to take Logan in

"I'm having a child" Oz clasped his hands together Logan tilted his head looking more confused

"Uh congrats Mr Oz?" Logan isn't sure why Mr Oz is telling him this or what the paper is

"No my boy you're the child sign the adoption papers please" Oz hated the way Logan looked shocked that someone wanted him "if you wish that is"

'You....want me?" Logan watched Mr Oz nod he hiccuped grabbing the pen signing the papers as he starred crying no ones really wanted him around

"Oh Logan it's alright" Oz has never been tempted to hit a woman but right now his tempted to hit Logan's mothers for what they've put him through

"C-can I call you dad?" Logan rubbed at his eyes while Oz had to keep it together

"Yes my boy you may call me dad if you wish" Oz is NEVER giving Logan's mom's him back Logan is his son only now

Poor Cookies

Requested by:

forgestorm

TW:

Death of a cookie sheet and cookies

I did use the hc of Kai not being able ta read but his trying his best here....failing but still trying

Kai stared at the burnt lumps of cookies on the cookie sheet he had just wanted to make Jay something cooking was Kai's strong suit not baking

But he thought with Zane's instructions he could make Jay some cookies but somehow it went wrong Kai isn't sure how

Kai groaned holding his face fsm this was so embarrassing he ended up having to throw the cookie sheet away in the end he couldn't save it

Kai pouted as he did the dishes that did survive his failed attempt at making cookies he felt a pair of arms wrap around his waist

"Heyyyy Kai baby what smells burnt?" Jay placed his chin on Kai's shoulder

".....Cookies" Kai placed the mixing bowl in the drying rack ignoring how red his face was from his embarrassment

"Cookies?" Jay knows Kai isn't a baker so why was he making cookies?

"I um wanted to make you cookies" Kai pouted more he still can't figure out where he went wrong

Jay cooed pulling Kai away from the sink after turning off the water can't have Zane yelling at Jay again for that

"Here I'll help you!" Jay beamed at Kai who looked uncertain

"But it isn't a surprise then if you help with them" Kai had wanted it to be a surprise after all

"Eh it's fine!" Jay kissed Kai's forehead going and grabbing everything they'd need Kai watched rubbing his hands together

Jay came back with things for a simple easy cookie to make placing them down waving Kai over who moved to where Jay was standing

"Here you can make them and I'll tell you what to do" Jay was only offering because he knows Kai wanted to make them

"Okay fine" Kai kissed Jay's cheek he can do this how hard can it be this time?

"Now take the flour and pour some into the bowl" Jay went and turned on the oven while Kai poured the flour

"Done....is this enough?" Kai looked at Jay who hummed going over and looking

"Yeah! Now add the baking soda!" Jay smiled at Kai who looked confused

"But this isn't the baking soda?" Kai held up the bottle he thought baking soda came in boxes

"Kai baby honey love of my life that is it....what did you put in your first batch" Jay raised an eyebrow at Kai wondering what the hell he thought was baking soda

Kai glared at Jay putting the bottle down and went and grabbed....salt that was salt okay Jay's thankful the cookies brunt wait that's mean his boyfriends trying his best!

"Kai that's salt" Jay watched Kai blink looking at the bottle struggling to read it before turning more red

"Oh....fuck it is" Kai was never going to live this down was he? His boyfriends gonna hold it over his head forever

Sweet Plasma

Requested by:

percy_jay

Kai was a little concerned Jay had locked himself up in his little lab the whole day not leaving to even eat something or maybe he did but Kai didn't see it?

Kai ended up making a sandwich for Jay given they were one of Jay's favorite foods to have much to Kai's surprise he always thought Jay would like something else? Not sure what though

He ended up also grabbing some water for Jay knowing that if he hadn't left to eat then it's highly unlikely Jay remembered to have some water nearby to drink

Kai after getting everything together went to Jay's little lab not even knocking on the door just opened it well he had to pick the lock but that didn't matter much

Kai smiled seeing the back of his boyfriend who was working on something he went over leaning down and blowing air on Jay's neck who jumped almost falling over

"Have you eaten yet?" Kai placed the food and water down on the desk trying to take a peak at what Jay was working on

"Um no! Hahaha must've gotten carried away again!" Jay was quick to cover whatever he was doing Kai frowned at that making Jay look away

"Hm I bought you a sandwich and water you should take a break" Kai would drag Jay away if needed and he knows that

"Sure sure just uh can I have your hand? The uh left one?" Jay looked nervous at that Kai smiled holding out his left hand for Jay

"Sure sure" Kai almost wanted to laugh at how flustered Jay was getting but he didn't for Jay's sake

"Can you close your eyes?" Jay looked ready to pass out so Kai did as asked closing his eyes he felt Jay place something on his ring finger "okay open"

Kai opened his eyes looking at the ring it was a gold band with a blue gem on it Kai hummed it wasn't perfectly made he can spot several things wrong with it but Jay made it so it's perfect

"This you asking me to marry you?~" Kai watched Jay nod quickly which oh wow he was only teasing "well I don't mind marrying someone as cute as you blue~"

Notes:

Plasma my beloved<3

*side eyes last ask* yeah soi hear kyle is a perv

-darkhumor anon

Oh really? Tell me more

*kicks feet up on my bed like a hyperactive schoolgirl* omg gurl let's gossip about the boys in our history class

-darkhumor anon

Yjeifbejd help?! Okay bet so *grabs face masks*

Astrid VS Mateo

Requested by:

Justinuse

TWS:

None

Astrid ran over Mateo's foot with her wheelchair going over to Logan while Mateo hopped around in pain Logan looked at her smiling

"Hey Astrid!" Logan leaned down kissing her cheek she shot Mateo a smug look as Logan stood up

"Hello Logan" She smiled at him was she and Mateo being petty towards each other? Yes but all is fair in this fight "how are you?"

"I'm fine Izzie got me to watch some amine" Logan didn't hate the amine it was kinda fun to watch but also really hard to follow at times

Astrid nodded before yelping when Z-blob yanked her back while Mateo rushed over wrapping an arm around Logan's shoulders

"Hey Logan!" Mateo stuck his tongue out at Astrid who was trying to get Z-blob off her

"Uh hey Teo" Logan tilted his head looking back at Astrid "are you guys fighting?"

"Nah just messing around!" Mateo leaned into Logan "right Astrid?"

"Sure just messing around" Astrid was so going to hit Mateo in the knees later though it's a good thing Logan hasn't noticed they're fighting over him

Notes:

Sorry it's not longer been busy lately brains being slow bc of it

God if I ever get hit by a truck and sent into anything pls be Lmk so I can have a good dad figure aka Pigsy no I don't care that I'd have ta help others save the city/world found family is worth it

Gays Baby And Dragon

Requested by:

halnax

TWS:

None

Shade stared at Kai who was holding a baby with a dragon behind him Kai smiled at him making Shade sigh crossing his arms

Since the merge happened Shade and Kai had ran into each other and started becoming friends and then lovers and now here Kai is with a baby and a new dragon

"Kai what do you have?" Shade eyed the dragon behind Kai he isn't sure they have often room for the dragon but they can try

"A baby! Oh and a dragon" Kai tilted his head waiting for Shade to let them into the house he sighed moving to the side

"Fine but if she throws up on me you're on the couch" Shade means this especially because he has no idea how to handle a baby whatsoever

"That's fine babe!" Kai carried the baby inside kissing Shade on the lips who sighed into the kiss

"I have no idea how to care for babies" Shade is warning Kai so he'd know that Shade has zero idea on what the hell to do

"That's also fine I'll help you figure it out" Kai beamed at Shade who couldn't help but smile back at Kai

"I'll hold you to it" Shade will have to figure out where to put the big ass dragon later

I don't see enough Pigsy angst hand it over rn