The New Hex Maniac

I very rarely feel like I'm actually in the moment. like 95 % of time I feel like there's a thin veil between me and reality. I'm never present I'm never there

are u ever sick w longing. and i don't just mean romantic longing. i mean longing for a place you barely get to see, longing for friends you no longer have, longing for feelings you might have left behind in your childhood, longing for creativity, longing for a rich and more expansive life, longing for less inhibition. longing for more passion. longing for ur life to be so incandescent w something it thaws all the frost in ur bones. are u ever so consumed w it it rends ur heart in two. do u understand me

i am fine so long as i don’t remember i’m alive & a person

my 5 year plan is to get back my joy

"-and then you were just there, existing, but we love you though." 😓

Anxiety is soooo cool, I called my providers mental health line to finally get some help and as soon as an actual person started to pick up I panicked and hung up.