Ten Ways I Cope With Psychosis

Gremlin’s Intro!

Welcome to my blog!

About Me:

Im 18

I go by she/they

I’m genderqueer & a lesbian

I’m conceptum & objectum

My Interests:

Video games (cult of the lamb, fallout shelter, & Minecraft especially)

Plushies

Witchcraft/Spirituality

Exotic pets

Plants & nature

Frutiger Aero/Aqua 🫶

DNI:

Fascists (homophobic, transphobic, misogynistic, etc)

Under 16

Proship/profic

Endosys/supporters

NSFW/Gore heavy blogs

Blog list:

Main blog: you are here 📍

Agere blog: @baby-mooshy-stars

Conceptum/Objectum blog: @starr-lovver

just one psychotic episode will change your life, forever. it'll alter your self perception beyond recognition. you'll remember who you were before, back when you were (relatively) sane, always been sane, and you won't recognize her anymore. she'll feel more like a sister. you're still the same, you are--but you aren't. you're different, you know you are. You're different in ways you cannot articulate, in ways your loved ones cannot truly grasp. you've experienced something most people believe is impossible to experience. likely because it is. it was something impossible, grand, and terrifying. the most scared you've ever felt in your life. God looked down on you and laughed, and finally, finally you know what it feels like to be that small and vulnerable. you can't go back to before, when you were naive, ignorant to your size. but it's okay. you're okay, now. it's over and you're safe. and you've always been safe, really, it wasn't real, but the trauma is. the trauma is real and it's lasting.

and it's not real. and you know it's not real. but sometimes you get scared again. so, so, so scared, because it was traumatizing and now you're left with flashbacks to a time when the world didn't make sense, when you weren't yourself, when you were small and confused and lost and could not understand yourself let alone be understood--and it feels real again. but you don't believe it, not really, you know you don't. you know it's not real. it's not psychosis round 2, but you're still so so scared--scared that you're wrong, that it is real, scared that you'll go back there--that you'll lose the sanity you grappled for. fought for. but you don't. not yet, at least. the flashback passes, same as any other flashback. but the fear lingers. you'll fear losing control like that for the rest of your life. years of sanity, remission, and you're still afraid, because you know what that felt like and it was scary. it's weird to believe again, when you don't really believe, it's weird to relive unreality while knowing you're within reality. you can feel your sanity, you know it's there, because it's saying "this isn't real and we know it's not real. we know this. but I am so so so scared anyway. I am so scared of experiencing it again. I am so scared that I was right and now I'm wrong."

psychosis is traumatic and trauma leaves you with flashbacks. and sometimes it feels like you're there again. like you've slipped away again. and it's scary. but you'll be back, I know you will, because I'm back, I'm okay, and you are too. I love you. I love all of you. love yourselves for me.

🔪

Fruit Correspondences

Apple: spirit work, offerings, love, healing, beauty, wisdom, harvest

Apricot: love, self love

Avocado: beauty, love, lust, fertility, spell work

Banana: wealth, luck, spirituality, religion, masculinity

Blueberry: protection, banishment, curses

Blackberry: protection, fertility, femininity, funerals, afterlife, moving on

Cantaloupe: spell work, protection, grounding, energy work

Cherry: lust, love, fertility

Clementine: childhood, dreams

Coconut: protection, cleansing, femininity

Cranberry: holidays, blood magic, spirit work

Date: fertility, luck, money

Dragon fruit: lust, passion, spell work

Durian: curses, cleansing, protection

Fig: happiness, divination, love

Grapefruit: cleansing

Grape: money, spell work, fertility, offerings

Guava: love, self love, lust

Honeydew: cleansing, energy, love

Jackfruit: divination, spell work, happiness

Kiwifruit: health, love, lust, happiness

Kumquat: luck, health, money

Lemon: cleansing, purification, protection, curse breaking

Lime: cleansing, protection, love

Lychee: love, self love, femininity, beauty

Mango: love, lust, fertility

Nectarine: love, self love, spell work

Orange: cleansing, protection, divination

Papaya: curse breaking, banishing, spirit work, love

Passion fruit: lust, love, passion

Peach: fertility, love, happiness, spirit work

Pear: offerings, happiness, luck, money, confidence

Persimmon: healing, love, luck, protection

Pineapple: protection, health, offerings, money, luck

Plantain: fertility, masculinity, lust, passion

Plum: love, healing, offerings

Pomegranate: offerings, blood magic, fertility, divination, spell work

Prune: cleansing, protection

Raspberry: love, dreams, health

Strawberry: love, wishes, dreams, happiness

Starfruit: lunar/solar magic, spell work, cleansing

Tangerine: solar magic, strength, energy work

Tomato: protection, cleansing, love, passion

Watermelon: healing, femininity, lust, love, spirit work, cleansing

Tip Jar

Cryptidcore Starterpack: The Guide

Notes: I'm gonna be leaning into Cryptozoology with this one, just a heads up :)

Enjoy part two!

I cannot stress this enough, GO OUTSIDE. How are you gonna track cryptids if you don't actively look for them?

Get a binder so you can add pages to your research journal

KEEP TRACK OF LOCAL EVENTS. Cryptid sightings, paranormal sightings, local mysteries, ect.

Find a hagstone near a body of water, it's a stone with a natural hole through it. In Celtic folklore, when you look though the hagstone(also known as a witchstone), you can see fae folk and other worldly entities. (I did not write all the info here, please do research for yourself if you'd like to)

Explore abandoned places and look for clues. Also in forests, but be safe about it.

Also- just going on a flat roof and making blanket forts with the FLUFFIEST blankets with a lantern is just- 🤌🤌

Moths.

Finds some books on this, "The United States of Cryptids- J.W. Ocker", "Cryptozoology A to Z- Loren Coleman" and "Cursed Objects- J.W. Ocker" are some good ones

Maybe find some friends who are into Cryptidcore too

But remember,

Most weird shit happens in Ohio

Update: Please check out my most recent post it's very important

Rewatched Gravity Falls

Hear me out

writing about a fanfic of the shape shifter that turns into the reader (that is Ford's partner) only to get the journals in it's hands !

is that a good idea or I'm just high? LMAO

Hello, we are a OSSD system whos been for years trying to make an AU to win popularity so here we are, sharing our DHMIS AU called Missing remains

Here we go

In this AU, Roy and Lesley were married, and they were humans at first like everyone, time passed and they had Yellow guy, which name as a Human was Doi, everything was fine at first until Doi started to act cold and mean until Doi dissapeared, Lesley was worried, one day she found him in the fridge, at least what was left of him, she discovered Roy ate him, and never talked about it, Lesley confronted Roy and fought him, She grabbed a piece of glass from the window and sliced Roy's throat in anger, she realized what she did and to cope with what she had to go through, drove far away, bought an studio and made a puppet show with her husband and her son's remains stuffed in puppets which actually came to life, due to the trauma of being eaten, Doi developed a DID system, consisting of David (smart yellow), the brainfriends, and grolton & hovris introjects, Doi wasnt really aware of his disorder, but he heard them everyday, also Doi met Duck and Red in that show, which also died as humans, duck, which was called Robin in a car accident, and Red, which was called alfred, drowned, in the show they met and had feelings for eachother but they arent really a couple because they dont know about eachothers feelings, the job of david is to evade Doi knowing what his father did to him.

I hope this wins popularity since this is our dream since we were little.

NO BITCHES?

🧍‍♀️ ❌ 🧍‍♀️ ❌ 🧍‍♀️ ❌ 🧍‍♀️ ❌

Hear me out conceptum edition

The 90’s Jazz design….