We All Talk About How Ridiculous Danny Phantom Would Be For The Justice League To Deal With But You Know

We all talk about how ridiculous Danny Phantom would be for the Justice League to deal with but you know who’d be even worse? Timmy. Goddamn. Turner.

Because Phantom and his villains might be insanely overpowered but at least they actually make sense and have a specific jurisdiction! Here’s this random kid who can and will make Literally Anything happen whenever and wherever he wants and half the League isn’t even allowed to know why! Batman tries to investigate and while he does find out that Dimmsdale is legitimately batshit insane any time he gets close to figuring it out all his leads end up taking him to a website that literally just says “Fuck You Crocker” in eighteen different languages including fucking Atlantean!(in totally unrelated news Aquaman hasn’t been answering his calls.) The space heroes hear about him and are all like “you mean that little fucker who brought Dark Laser to life?” and this is news to everyone else because somehow they missed the LITERAL DEATH STAR SHARING THEIR ORBIT!!!!

And then when they finally manage to bring him in to get things cleared up Constantine goes even more ballistic than he did with Phantom, because You Absolutely Do Not Fuck With The Fae And Their Chosen. Do you want the apocalypse? Because messing with this shit is how you get the apocalypse.

Now, this Limited Interaction Policy worked out well with Phantom because he and the League had the right perspective to understand why it existed and go along with it. Timmy, who is a child having fun hanging out with superheroes and has been conditioned by circumstance to distrust magical authority figures, decides that Constantine is a bitch-ass motherfucker and starts interacting with the League as much as he possibly can out of Spite, which Cosmo and Wanda are actively encouraging both so he can potentially have positive relationships with adults for once and for the lols. He very quickly clocks Batman and Wonder Woman as being parent-shaped and will often just follow one of them around the Watchtower if he’s bored. 

Also when he meets the Young Justice team his first thought is to wonder what would happen if he put Wally “I can run faster than sound but magic isn’t real” West in a room with Denzel “Everything is because of Fairy Godparents” Crocker and locked the door.