Hey Uhhh Yeah Sorry But I Accidentally Sharpened Your Boyfriend Too Much And Yeah He Broke Sorry

yeah we put your boyfr- oh she transitioned? good for her! so anyway we put your girlfriend in the fucking slop sorry

H-HATSUNE MIKU!? AT THIS TIME OF YEAR!? AT THIS TIME OF DAY!? IN THIS PART OF THE COUNTRY!? LOCALIZED ENTIRELY WITHIN YOUR KITCHEN!?

Yes!

May I see her?

No.

REBLOG IF ITS OKAY TO TALK TO YOU.

Please.

@salticid​ you’re amazing and I love ur cryptic spambot convo I hope u like this!!

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Idk what the hell happened last night but I think I was just mad about the incisors thing and how goofy mimics look

I watched vita carnis

It was ok but not really scary at all

Cheap jumpscares and meh worldbuilding mostly

The only thing that makes me mad is the way mimics are, like bro anyone could beat these skinny mfs

If I remember correctly they’re only 6ft and can only injure you by biting with incisors which won’t do shit

The mimic in my house getting its ass beat by an actual predator species that doesn’t have dumb anatomy: 😃

don’t mind me jus uploading sailor moon art i forgor to post here but i would like everyone to perceive cringefail rei hino

My friends are so cool and cute and funny and good and nice and hot and god I’m mentally ill

probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.

we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."

at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.

the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.

the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.

what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.

here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.

international cut your hair like your icon day how screwed are you