Sophisticated-trash - Unbetitelt

Since I can’t find the original posts (and if anyone can, let me know) I’ll just post this image to show people, who may not know, where all this “humans are space orcs” stuff started. 

Tony: *goes into peters room*

Peter: *closes laptop*

Tony: guess it’s just you and me tonight

Peter: okay, I’ll be down soon

Tony: *leaves and barges back in* whAT ARE YOU HIDING FROM ME

Peter: pORN

Tony: DONT LIE TO ME

Peter: fine I’m trying to send a message to this girl

The leprechaun and the golfer

A golfer playing in Ireland hooked his drive into the woods. Looking for his ball, he found a little Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump on his head and the golfer’s ball beside him.

Horrified, the golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it over the little guy, reviving him.

‘Arrgh! What happened?’ the Leprechaun asked.

'I’m afraid I hit you with my golf ball,’ the golfer says.

'Oh, I see. Well, ye got me fair and square. Ye get three wishes, so whaddya want?’

'Thank God, you’re all right!’ the golfer answers in relief. 'I don’t want anything, I’m just glad you’re OK, and I apologize.’

And the golfer walks off.

'What a nice guy,’ the Leprechaun says to himself.

I have to do something for him. I’ll give him the three things I would want… a great golf game, all the money he ever needs, and a fantastic sex life.’

A year goes by and the golfer is back. On the same hole, he again hits a bad drive into the woods and the Leprechaun is there waiting for him.

'Twas me that made ye hit the ball here, ’ the little guy says. 'I just want to ask ye, how’s yer golf game?’

'My game is fantastic!’ the golfer answers. 'I’m an internationally famous golfer now.’ He adds, 'By the way, it’s good to see you’re all right.’

'Oh, I’m fine now, thank ye. I did that fer yer golf game, you know. And tell me, how’s yer money situation?’

'Why, it’s just wonderful!’ the golfer says cheerfully. 'When I need cash, I just reach in my pocket and pull out $100 bills I didn’t even know were there!’

'I did that fer ye also.’ And tell me, how’s yer sex life?’

The golfer blushes, turns his head away in embarrassment, and says shyly, 'It’s OK.’

'C'mon, c'mon now,’ urged the Leprechaun, 'I’m wanting to know if I did a good job. How many times a week?’

Blushing even more, the golfer looks around then whispers, 'Once, sometimes twice a week.’

'What??’ responds the Leprechaun in shock. 'That’s all? Only once or twice a week?’

'Well,’ says the golfer, 'I figure that’s not bad for a Catholic priest in a small parish.’

the umbrella academy but there’s no context

Expressive Snake Portraits by Ben Simon Rehn Capture Serpentine Elegance in Brilliant Hues

Good omens, the lost angel, chap 1.

So, when a Neil dropped the hint that ss2 would involve someone who lost their memory, for some reason I thought of Gabriel.

After the almost Armageddon, Aziraphale and Crowley set up a cottage somewhere outside the city and they decided to go to LA for a vacation (mostly because Crowley got bored of the simple and peaceful life in the countryside and the garden work).

And they ran into Gabriel.

Also if you enjoy my comics, consider supporting me on Patreon for early access and concept arts, sketches and more comics ^^ it would mean a great deal. Thank you for reading my story

Chap 2

Nekocat

Nekocat

Good omens, the lost angel, chap 2 Office work Chap 1 Good omens, the lost angel, chap 1. So, when a Neil dropped the hint that ss2 would in

People really loved my Chef Rodan, so I give you…

Chef Rodan Ramsay!

*PLEASE DO NOT REPOST MY ART*

(I had to watch some Gordon Ramsay videos to find all the references… man, I really love him!)

I like the idea that humans are space orcs because of being walking trashbins which are a flaming wreckage of bodge jobs all the way down. Ships are floating clouds of debris under constant repair or... improvement. Space suits are held together with duct tape. We are literally covered in swarms of bacteria which are 50/50 on purpose or debilitating illness, not to mention filled up in side with the same.

Humans get sick or hurt and most aliens are just like "not sure if this is an infection, or if you'll die without it." The last time anyone tried to repair a human operated ship, the resulting explosion blasted a nearby moon through a wormhole into orbit around a different planet.

Even human genetics is a total trashpile, junk genes, weird extra DNA that no one knows what it does, former viruses, you name it, somewhere down the line humans just vacuumed up everything into the go-juice and stacked it up like a genetic hoarder. The study of human biology is half occult science half transmutation until one guy starts breaking it down and discovers chunks of hundreds of other alien genetics and basically it turns out Earth was a kind of "makeout point" back in the days of primordial ooze and was filled so full of outer space ejaculate that under a modern day equivalent of black light it still glows brighter than the sun.