I Feel Like JC Has Some Weird Gender Shit Going On. Not Even In The Normal Sense; In The ‘assigned

Okay okay listen Tim would never understand Jason’s need to provide but he recognizes the devotion of it all and when he finally gets it… he’s never letting go. A different kind of devotion. That’s something they can both understand

yessss. YES. they initially have completely different views on it! Tim hates the part of himself that Jason craves to feed - he sees it as parasitic, a reason for shame, and the possibility that he could go too far one day and kill what he loves. For Tim, it's something to hate; for Jason, it's something to love.

But Tim understands devotion. He understands wanting to be claimed, wanting to belong wholly and utterly to someone, and he starts to see Jason's obsession with it as akin to that feeling. He wants it too, he feels it too OwO

Because what makes me insane about it is just...their problems are the same. Jason hates the wolf; Tim loves the wolf, because the wolf is Jason. Tim hates his thirst; Jason loves his thirst, because the thirst is Tim. It's so... if we have to hurt to live, then let me bear it with you. i'm not normal about it

Back with some normal Jayvik content today, this one is a comic commission I drew for @una_ragazza_qualunque8 who wrote a lovely fic named "A Terrible Liar", you can find it on her Ao3 and I gotta warn you to keep your toothbrush near you because they wrote a super sweet jayvik! 😭💖💕 You can find the uncropped version of this comic soon on my Patreon, X and Bluesky 🔥✨

this post said it so well so just sharing <3

(it's also insane because Jayce's yearning face was just as bad if not worse)

Look, I love Wei Wuxian and think he had very good reasons for doing the things he did, but I do think if you’re looking at the contrast between how Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng feel about him post-resurrection their very different personalities and moral outlooks account for maybe half of the gulf and the rest is just that Lan Wangji isn’t really one of the people Wei Wuxian fucked over. He hurt his feelings and killed members of his clan, but he’s not the one he flaked on, or left, or broke promises to. Lying to a guy you’re in love with but are not pursuing a relationship with is different from lying to your coworker/roommate/platonic life partner you’re supposed to be doing post genocide reconstruction with. Being mean to your crush is not the same thing as refusing to explain to your little brother what you’re dealing with in terms of physical capability and ongoing trauma and how that relates to why you keep ditching him and your shared responsibilities to daydrink. Xichen and Lan Qiren made it out of Nevernight alive and well. Wei Wuxian (probably) didn’t contribute to Sizhui being orphaned, although if his parents were cultivators I suppose it’s possible that he did kill them during the war. Even if that’s the case, they were not people who Lan Wangji considered part of a family he shared with Wei Wuxian. He doesn’t look at his child and think about what a better life his kid would be leading if he’d had the strength to cut Wei Wuxian off for real.  Even when it comes to things that are superficially equivalent, like Wei Wuxian playing a role in both Lan and Jiang cultivators being possessed and killed, the fact that Wei Wuxian was himself a member of the Jiang clan and they’re being fucked over by someone who used to be one of them is a pretty big contextual difference. Again, this is not me coming for a teenager with PTSD who was doing his best and trying to both look after his family and avert a genocide! I’m just saying that Jiang Cheng has a lot of reasons that Lan Wangji does not to be experiencing some ambivalence on the topic of everybody’s favourite necromancer.

This is just so them

having a lot of thoughts this evening about the classic yunmeng reconciliation trope of “magic plot device forces the jiang cheng sacrifice reveal” running head first into “wei wuxian is canonically The Worst™ at boundaries” and in cql canon literally sticks a mind control talisman on lwj for a prank and it’s never mentioned again

so like. picture this. Jiang Cheng has a secret. no, not that secret, some other secret. something smaller and almost as sad and maybe even a little tawdry??? Jiang Cheng has fucked, is what I’m saying. and there’s some monster who eats virgins and Wei Wuxian is GLEEFUL at the opportunity to SWOOP IN AND SAVE HIS SHIDI, of course he and hanguang-jun will take care of it chengcheng, only for extremely grumpy jiang cheng to red-facedly inform his brother that he is NOT a virgin and he can lead his own night hunts THANK YOU

and the top of wei wuxian’s head comes off

Jiang Cheng. JIANG CHENG. His tiny baby awkward blushing foot-in-mouth shidi. JIANG CHENG. Jiang Cheng who was blacklisted by the matchmakers. Jiang Cheng who was supposed to be SAVING HIMSELF FOR MARRIAGE LIKE A PROPER YOUNG SECT HEIR. jiang cheng has fucked. 

Wei Wuxian has to know. he HAS to know. he is insane. he is bothering jiang cheng CONSTANTLY. he will not shut up. he will never shut up. Jiang Cheng will not know peace until he reveals to Wei Wuxian who dared to sully his precious baby brother with their slutty hands!!!!

but of course it’s like…sad. a few doomed wartime trysts with Nie Mingjue, or a single slow aching fumbling goodbye with Wen Qing who decided she didn’t want to die a virgin, or a few companionable years falling exhausted into bed with Jin Guangyao and/or Qin Su once the boys were FINALLY asleep…or for maximum gut punch, maybe it’s the old standby where Jiang Cheng was raped after his capture. 

the point is, this isn’t a fun funny sexy story for Jiang Cheng, this isn’t an exploit to crow over or an embarrassing but ultimately warm encounter. this is an old, quiet, painful, pointless memory of something tragic that Jiang Cheng still feels miserable about, and also thinks he’s pathetic for feeling miserable, and also it’s fucking private. so no matter how much WWX whines and wheedles and threatens and cajoles and begs, he won’t tell. he gets angry and snappish at first, and then instead of cracking, he just starts retreating into himself and not responding to WWX any more, which is, obviously, UNacceptable!!! 

the minute the evil not-unicorn is dead wwx invents a truth talisman in a 76-hour frenzy, slams it on jiang cheng’s back, and gets more than he bargained for

height differences

can't stop drawing them...

if you want, I post more Jayvik doodles on bluesky 🦋

Pull the blanket tight now.

In my mind they are intertwined in the void or an alternate universe and ITS A FACT

There’s something sooooo fhgsjdhcb about Jason’s blood sustaining Tim. The most intimate (he’s literally in his veins) instinctive (he’s providing, sharing, giving himself) trusting (trust to give, trust to take) way to take care of Tim. Hot!

Skdkfjsks YOU GET IT, YOU GET ME OTL

godddd that's exactly it. I'm clasping you by the shoulders anon, YOU GET IT. It's about providing, it's about being so deep in you that I am literally what makes your heart beat. It's about absolute trust and devotion - feed on me and only me, I can take it (I have supernatural regeneration powers baby, this is a win-win)

And low-key? The act of providing for you is what saves me. When I am reduced to nothing but my pain and animal rage, your teeth in my neck reminds me that not all pain is bad. My blood in your veins tethers me to who I am. I am more than this

(this is the theme that sustained me through writing the rest of this fic:

my claws tear your skin, but it’s my blood that splashes on the ground. i cut you but it’s me who bleeds

It's the concept of two as one; let me crawl inside of you and make a home in your bones OwO)

It makes Jason bark bark woof woof awooga crazy and it also makes ME bark bark woof woof awooga crazy amdfnsmsnsksj