Batman…..

This is fucking stupid but I decided to post this again after I deleted it a long time ago bc I hated it. Anyways gojo gave birth to megumi he is literally a mother

Skibidi die.

Alt versions of the drawing - the main drawing was posted right before this. <3

sibling behavior ig

La escuela no me deja mucho tiempo para dibujar pipipi

Also, if you get the reference *Kisses you on the forehead*

Bruce has to spend a day working an important mission with the league at the watchtower but the kids are bored so he tells them as long as they don’t disrupt the JL’s work they can hang around the watchtower and then get takeout on the way home. they succeed in keeping themselves to themselves but don’t quite manage not being disrupting. this is because Tim convinced them to do a tiktok trend.

*the league, pouring over case files in serene silence*

*heard faintly from three rooms away*

Tim, Damian, and Jason: we listen and we don’t judge,

Jason: my original plan for terrorising B after coming back to Gotham was to start leaving him a bunch of creepy voicemails Taken-style, and the only reason i scrapped it was because i just genuinely couldn’t remember Bruce’s phone number.

*Bruce lifts his head, squinting slightly*

The kids: we listen and we don’t judge,

Tim: when i was nine my camera broke because a rogue that Batman was fighting threw the car i left it in off a bridge and i was so mad at Batman that i sold photos i’d taken of Bruce Wayne wearing a thong on his private beach to the Gotham Gazette to buy a new one

*the rest of the league also lift their heads, staring at Bruce uncomfortably. Bruce shifts in his seat*

Jason: THAT WAS YOU?

Tim: YOU’RE JUDGING WE SAID NO JUDGING-

Damian: i feel like we should be able to judge OCCASIONALLY.

*the league, eyeing each other*

Clark: they wont… post that video online, right?

Bruce, sighing: to the family groupchat, probably.

*heard again from across the watchtower*

The kids: we listen and we don’t judge,

Jason: back in the league Damian’s hamster died and we told him it was natural causes but it’s actually because i set it loose during a meeting and Ra’s freaked out and stepped on it.

Jason: OK DRAWING A SWORD MEANS JUDGEMENT DAMIAN PUT IT BACK-

Diana: should you be… checking on them?

Bruce, dead inside: what am i supposed to do about it?

Ollie: aren’t you in charge of them?

Bruce, completely seriously: i’m not in charge of anything anymore.

The kids: we listen and we don’t judge,

Damian: when I was a child I was forced to kill 183 people and I dream of their faces every night

Tim: Damian I don’t think you understand the game.

Bruce, getting up: I’m going to go-

The rest of the league, simultaneously:

Clark: see if the kids are-

Diana: we can handle this-

Barry: you got this buddy-

Ollie: yeah go- go take a break-

Damian grew up listening to Jason telling stories of his time with Bruce, and being the competitive little shit that he is decides he has to one up the guy once he gets to Gotham. this leads to him waiting until the perfect opportunity and proceeding to steal the tires off not just the batmobile, but all the vehicles in the cave. he pulls it off perfectly and he’s incredibly proud of it UP UNTIL Dick and Tim start panicking that Jason Todd’s vengeful ghost is clearly haunting the cave and is clearly agitated at Damian being the new Robin- after all, he only started fucking with things after Damian took the mantle, so he must have disapproved, right?

after two weeks he has to call Jason, scuffing his feet on the ground and gritting his teeth as he explains the situation.

“….what.”

directing his glare to the ceiling, Damian stubbornly repeats, “Grayson and Drake will no longer let me in the cave. they believe that your ghost is angry with me and are afraid you will become agitated by my presence there.”

“…” he waited impatiently for Jason’s response. “well how the fuck did you manage that?”

“your brothers are imbeciles.”

“first of all i’ve not even seen Tim since he got taken in, i met him like once when i was thirteen at a gala when we took turns trying to throw olives into an old lady’s handbag from the balcony above, he is more your brother than mine,” Damian rolled his eyes, tapping his foot and peeking out from behind the curtain he was hiding behind to call from, ensuring Alfred wasn’t nearby. “second of all why the fuck would they immediately assume i want you gone? didn’t they wonder why i didn’t start haunting the cave when the replacement took my mantle?”

“you’re acting like there should be logic behind any of this. i stole some tires and now they think your spirit wants me dead.”

“just tell them you took the tires.”

“but then i’d be caught and my mission would be a technical failure.”

“sucks to suck.”

Jason was not much help.

he was even less help when he came to Gotham and, in between establishing himself as an anonymous crime lord in Crime Alley, starts fucking breaking into the batcave to move shit about and leave threatening messages claiming that ‘the ghost of Robin is displeased with Damian’

Damian is this fucking close to just revealing Red Hood’s identity. on the plus side Tim is having the ego boost of his life learning that his successor’s ghost was ok with his Robin but not Damian’s. he’s been on a permanent high for the past month and it’s not going down any time soon.

Bruce is just sick of Dick sobbing through seance attempts while he’s trying to work at the batcomputer.

Dick's puppy dog eyes are extremely powerful

Commission Info / Kofi (members get comics a week early)

Wedding :)

sometimes dick has nightmares or thinks that jason being alive is a dream, so he checks up on jason pretty often. dick would sneak into his room, at night and see if hes breathing. so, jason would wake up to a dick grayson looming over his bed and it would creep him out.

Dick: *had a nightmare that jason wasnt actually alive and it was all a figment of his imagination. breaks into his apartment/room and checks on jason.*

Dick:

Jason: *wakes up to see someone standing over his bed, watching him sleep. doesnt see its dick bc its dark in his room, but knows his presence. is still freaked the fuck out.*

Jason: what the actual fuck, grayson?

Dick: *realizes the absurdity of the situation.*

Dick: ..sorry.

Jason:

Jason: its okay.

Dick: sleepover?

Jason: fine. just this once. dont get used to it.

jason allows it bc hes happy that someone actually cares enough about him to check if hes alive.

AGRHRGRHRGR IM SO NOT NORMAL ABT THEM ILYT SO MUCH WAHHHHHH

been thinking about jason being petty towards bruce. like, oh, you spend time with your other kids, but not me? tire privileges revoked! it would be over stupid shit too.

like there’s one time bruce decides to take damien to the movies, and jason is just beside himself.

like the conversation would be like:

JASON: So, let me get this straight—you took Damian to a movie.

BRUCE: He asked.

JASON: Oh, and I wouldn’t have wanted to see Kung Fu Panda 4 with you?!

BRUCE: You were busy.

JASON: Busy taking down a cartel. Which, by the way, I learned from you. I deserve quality time!

BRUCE: Jason—

JASON: No. No excuses. You’ll learn.

Jason storms off. Five minutes later, an alert pops up on the Batcomputer.

BATCOMPUTER: Warning: Batmobile rear tires have been removed.

BRUCE: …Jason.

Cut to Jason outside, rolling two Batmobile tires away, cackling.