Batsiblings Convince Jason To Get Himself A Cooking Tiktok Account, And He Gives In. To His Surprise,

honkshoo mimimi

Freshly adopted Jason, who is so used to taking care of his mother that the first morning in the manor, he wakes up in early hours to cook for Bruce, too.

Logically speaking, he understands that Bruce doesn't need it — he is a healthy adult, and they have Alfred — but it is six in the morning, and his mind is foggy, so he just follows his instincts. Maybe he does not even realise that mom is not here, after all.

Alfred finds him in the weakly dimmed kitchen when he finishes his walk around the Manor before starting with his chores. He is amused at first, stopping quietly behind the child. He is doing great (that's a surprise since Dick intentionally just stirred more trouble), and Alfred can't help but smile a little.

'Good morning, master Jason. If you are hungry, you should wake me up the next time. I promise to take care of you.'

Jason blinks owlishly, still awfully sleepy. His eyes are barely opened, his hands working on the automat.

'Breakfast,' he mumbles, frowning a little. 'For mom- I mean, for dad.'

Alfred's smile falters. His original impression shifts in a late realisation.

Oh.

'Master Jason, you shouldn't really-'

'Finished,' he yawns, putting a one — just one, nothing for himself at all — plate in front of Alfred.

It is a very simple dish, scrambled eggs with some black paper and toasted bread — but not even made in a toaster, just on the pan; this kid probably doesn't know how to use toasters. It smells nice, Alfred compliments mentally.

'Can you-' He yawns. 'Pass to-'

And then little Jason falls asleep helplessly, falling right in Alfred's arms. He catches him, of course. This boy weighs nothing at all.

'Hey, Al,' Bruce sticks his head in the kitchen, no less sleepy. 'What is going on?'

Alfred explains to Bruce what happened, and he is no less distraught. He helps him to put Jason in the bed and eats all the breakfast he prepared, with a mixture of delight and despair.

And when Jason wakes up, embarrassed by the faint memories of the early morning, Alfred puts a big plate in front of him, filled with so much food that his big blue eyes light up instantly.

'Bon appetite, master Jason,' he smiles. 'Your cooking had passed my personal standards for a cook. You are a good soldier.'

Jason giggles, his mouth already stuffed with bacon.

'That I am.'

And that he always will be.

Hats.. my nemesis

Who better to beat the final level in Mario than the world’s greatest detective? (Or how to entertain sidekicks 101)

It’s probably Battison, but honestly this image has been stuck in my head for a while — let him be a good dad!!

Simple Crime ally child

sometimes dick has nightmares or thinks that jason being alive is a dream, so he checks up on jason pretty often. dick would sneak into his room, at night and see if hes breathing. so, jason would wake up to a dick grayson looming over his bed and it would creep him out.

Dick: *had a nightmare that jason wasnt actually alive and it was all a figment of his imagination. breaks into his apartment/room and checks on jason.*

Dick:

Jason: *wakes up to see someone standing over his bed, watching him sleep. doesnt see its dick bc its dark in his room, but knows his presence. is still freaked the fuck out.*

Jason: what the actual fuck, grayson?

Dick: *realizes the absurdity of the situation.*

Dick: ..sorry.

Jason:

Jason: its okay.

Dick: sleepover?

Jason: fine. just this once. dont get used to it.

jason allows it bc hes happy that someone actually cares enough about him to check if hes alive.

AGRHRGRHRGR IM SO NOT NORMAL ABT THEM ILYT SO MUCH WAHHHHHH

Jason would adopt a kid (or a kid would adopt Jason, let’s be real) and he would never outright tell anyone. It would be up to everyone ELSE to find out. Whether that be by accident or by suspicious snooping

Jason: hey guys, im gong to the store. anyone want anything? tim: uh some granola bars for patrol would be great. what are you going to the store for? jason: *non-chalantly* a night light tim: tim: are you . . . afraid of the dark? jason: no tim:

jason: *yanking a super sugary cereal out of dick's hands* that stunts growth and development dick: dick: i am,,,,, fully rown and developed?????? jason: well then you're setting a bad example for young and impressionable children dick: damian????????? jason: no dick: then who?????

cassandra: would you like to come to my ballet recital? everyone else is busy. jason: umm . . . can i bring a plus one? cassandra: sure. who? jason: my daughter cassandra: awww that's a great idea! later: cassandra: wait. you don't have a daughter. jason: yes i do? cassandra: okay then. *promptly never mentions it to anyone else*

steph: *visiting jason* uh . . . dude jason: *wearing a "my dad jokes are the price of my cooking" apron and cooking while holding a child on his hip* yea? steph: steph: what the FU- jason: LANGUAGE steph: -DGE

bruce: jason has been acting off. i need the two of you to tail him tonight and report back to me. stephanie: no. bruce: what do you mean no? duke: i wouldn't willingly tail jason todd if you told me you would pay for my college bruce: im already going to pay for your college duke: exactly. and i'm gonna to need my life to make use of that fact. so im not going to tail the murderous crime lord turned vigilante. no way. bruce: something's wrong, i'm telling you two. stephanie, who has alrady met her niece and is the first aunt to have been named: ask someone else dude. idk what else t' tell ya

bruce: tim, something's wrong with jason tim, who found out through steph the day previous and has since met his niece as well: he got a girl bruce: *wide-eyed* he has a girlfriend???? tim: that's not-- you know what, sure

Jason with his All Blade tattoo's 😚

Red hood: *picks up ringing phone in middle of meeting* what’s u— *pauses* goons: *lean in to listen* hood: wait, what?? Alfie’s gone for the—fuck, don’t tell me you—fuck. You did. You went in the kitchen. You idiot! Why would you do that? You—fucking fuck, dick, macaroons?? Of all the things you could make him, why did you chose the LITERAL HARDEST thing we have ingredients for, I—fucking hell. goons: *exchange confused glances* hood: *gets up out of chair in apparent outrage* wait there. Don’t touch a single goddamned thing, you hear me? Wait for—*large crashing sound on other side of phone* hood: *facepalming* did you . . . Just . . . Break the fucking mixer??? hood: sit your asses down. I’ll be there in five. If I get there and you touched one more fucking thing in the kitchen I will have you out of the manor. Apparently you need fucking parental supervision. goons: *watch in confusion as the crime boss walks out*

Family picture

Bruce was not invited