What Do You Mean Those Hot Ladies Aren't Trying To Follow Me Because They Think I'm Hilarious???

I was a dick to my partner during covid isolation, and I was procrastinating on writing an apology, so – as one does – I eventually, half-seriously, googled apology templates.

And I found this amazing website. It did not bring me AT ALL closer to writing my partner an apology, but it brought me immeasurable joy. I made choked animal howling noises for much of my perusing time.

Sometimes they’re kind of normal (this one is a message saying “I can’t attend your org’s event because I disagree with their politics”) but the title is phrased hilariously.

Others are, in fact, hilarious.

Most are sincere, but not all:

“Zoom Incident”

And my favorite:

“I AM NOT SURE WHY I ASSUMED THAT HE WOULD NOT BE INDOORS WHEN I DROPPED BY ON MONDAY”

hey look at this anti-tf2 post from an old homophobic christian forum

[n portal through posts 😁

THEFT

if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

So I have this headcanon about Larry...

we should abandon the current US government system and replace it with the ranking system in warrior cats don’t @ me

time for me to laugh at old internet posts again

feels like a majority of the time being like "sorry if that was weird", "sorry if that made you uncomfortable", "sorry if I'm being annoying" etc. is more likely to come off as weird, make someone uncomfortable, or feel annoyed than whatever was initially said