House Shenanigans

House Vines

Gryffindor prefect relaxing in the tub late at night in the prefect’s bathroom.

Ravenclaw prefect: in a lifeguard uniform sitting on the edge of the tub, sexily. I see you don’t have a lifeguard here at your beach.

Gryffindor prefect: physically confused

Raveclaw prefect: acting sexy

Gryffindor prefect: I’m not at the beach-this is a bathtub.

House Vines

Hufflepuff: I spilt lipstick in your Valentino bag.

Slytherin: Oh! You spill-WaWAwAWa-LIPSTICK In mY VaLeNtInO WHITE bAg!!

House Vines

Ravenclaw: Why didn’t you tell me that you are a werewolf!?

Gryffindor: On our first date I said I was a “dog person”.

Ravenclaw:

Gryffindor:

Ravenclaw: Man you’re right.

House Vines

Gryfindor: What did you get in your happy meal?

Hufflepuff: Chapstick, what’d you get?

Gryfindor: A new SKATEBOARD!

Hufflepuff: Wha-

Gryfindor: *while skating away* LATER PUSSY!

House Vines

Slytherin: *to literally everybody else* ThE BaGs uNdEr My eYeS ArE PRADA.

Slytherin: *Laughs menacingly*

Gryfindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff:...

Slytherin: Kill your family.

House Vines

Hufflepuff: You have a beautiful smile.

Ravenclaw: Thank you...You’re not that handsome.

Hufflepuff: Wow.

Hufflepuff: Thanks!

House Vines

Gryffindor: I’m not gonna convresate with you. I’m not gonna invest time-

Slytherin: *stirring tea* I think it’s converse.

Gryffindor: Huh?

Slytherin: Just say talk. *sips tea*

House shenanigans

Slytherin: pulls out a knife

Hufflepuff: oh no.

Slytherin: uses knife to open cardboard box

Hufflepuff: phew.

Slytherin: pulls out gun from cardboard box

Hufflepuff: oH nO.

House Vines

Muggle Hufflepuff: *sitting in car in front of a Wendys with Gryfindor, who is recording Hufflepuff* Is Wendy working today? *faces the camera smiling*

Muggle Gryfindor: Bruh, you didn’t roll your window down.

Muggle Hufflepuff: Wha?

Muggle Hufflepuff: Is Wendy working today? *once again faces Gryfindor’s camera smiling*

Muggle Gryfindor: I think they’re closed.

Muggle Hufflepuff: Yeah me too.

Muggle Hufflepuff: Hey, is Wendy working today?

Muggle Gryfindor: Dude I think we’re at Taco Bell-

Muggle Hufflepuff: *tears in eyes* WhAt hOw!?

House Vines

Muggle born Gryffindor: My mom said if I don’t get my grades up, she’s not gonna let me get my tetanus shot next year.

Hufflepuff: That’s weird..what are you gonna do?

Muggle born Gryffindor: Fucking study I guess.