So, this is half writing advice, half life advice.
We all need to be able to recognize when an apology is manipulative, on both a large and small scale. I think we're all aware of the most recent large apology. Quite a few of these apply to that.
But also, feel free to use this as writing advice, too.
Not all of these are necessarily manipulative on their own. If you have apologized to someone for a mistake and done any of these, it doesn't mean you were trying to manipulate them. A lot of these can be completely unintentional. But, put more of them together and take them to more of an extreme, and then you begin to have a problem.
Third person. Especially in reference to the past, using third person to refer to yourself in an apology is a form of detachment. It's dodging the mistake and shifting the blame onto a false 'past self' to avoid taking responsibility.
Hyperbolic self hate. In a casual apology, a little self pity isn't out of place. If you're usually self deprecating, it's normal. It becomes dangerous when it's less like "sorry, I suck at remembering times", and more like "I'm a horrible person, I'm so stupid and terrible and cruel-".
Hyperbolic consequences. On the same note, it's also manipulative to say "I should die/be hurt/be abandoned". It's forcing the listener to feel guilty and feel as if they have caused feelings of depression.
Blaming, not explaining. Often, when apologizing, we want to explain why we may have done something wrong. That's normal! But a good apology should make the other person understand why you made the mistake, not tell them that you didn't make the mistake because you couldn't control it. This is also a form of guilt tripping.
Selective addressing. This one applies to if the apology is for more than one issue. A manipulator may fully address one point, but disregard or gloss over another, then use this to pretend that they fully addressed both, or that they don't need to apologize more than once.
Forced relatability. To make someone feel bad for them, a manipulator may place blame on things the listener can relate to going through, or has sympathy for. This makes them feel as if they cannot criticize them without acting as a hypocrite, or insensitive.
Gaslighting. I'm sure you all know how this one works, but it isn't always "that didn't happen"- it can be "that wasn't as bad as you say", or "you didn't get that it was a joke?". It twists reality to downplay events.
Strawman/subject changing. These are together because they function the same way. A strawman is a falsified or exaggerated arguement that can be easily disproved, and usually has nothing to do with the topic at hand. This can make it seem like the situation has been addressed, and demonizes the victim.
Triangulation. This is when another person is involved in an arguement, usually by the manipulator. This can be to make the victim jealous, focus their attention on the other person, or force them to side with their abuser in disliking them. There is little to no communication between the victim and the added person, and can be used in apologies to shift blame or distract from the issue.
Love-bombing. Less of an apology, and more of a substitute for one. Instead of owning up to their actions, a manipulator may shower the victim with affection and praise, attempting to create a sense of loyalty or a feeling that they can't be as bad as perceived.
That's all I'll get into, but there are far more than I've listed. If you think you're being manipulated, I urge you to research further.
Compilation of writing advice for some aspects of the writing process.
How to motivate myself to write more
How to get rid of writer’s block
Basic Overview: How to write a story
How to create a character
How to make a character unique
How to write conversation
Introducing a group of characters
Large cast of characters interacting in one scene
Redemption arc
Plot twists
How to write a summary
How to write romance
How to write emotional scenes
How to write yelling
Fatal Character Flaws
How to use songs in a fanfiction
Good traits gone bad
More specific scenarios
Slow burn
How to create quick chemistry
How to write a bilingual character
How to write a polyamorous realtionship
How to create and write a cult
Criminal past comes to light
Reasons for breaking up while still loving each other
Forbidden love
Date gone wrong
Causes for the apocalypse
How to create a coffee shop atmosphere
How to write enemies to lovers
How to write lovers to enemies to lovers
Arranged matrimony for royalty
Paramilitary Forces/ Militia
Honeymoon
Academic Rivals to Lovers
How to write amnesia
AU ideas
Favourite tropes
Inconvenient things a ghost could do
Milestones in a relationship
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The more I think about it the more I realise that no ancient civilization would be at all interested in taming dragons.
Dragons are carnivores, so they’re really inefficient and costly to feed. They’re solitary, so its really frigging hard to form any kind of relationship with them. They’re darn right dangerous, so why risk your life taming one when there’s loads of llamas in the world. And worst of all their life spans are insanely long; if you had an opportunity to breed one, you wouldn’t live long enough to see the fruit of your labour mature, so you wouldn’t even bother.
This May I want to get back into writing. I’m not at all consistent. I’m at a point where I don’t feel like I can work on bigger things, because I can’t guarantee myself to keep working on it in a week from now. So I will take this month as a training month to get back into the habit of writing. I will do this by writing (or trying to write) 200 words every day. Topic is irrelevant. How great my writing is that day is irrelevant. Just 200 words written down. A habit taking 21 days to form was debunked, it does take a lot longer, but 31 days are a start I would say. These are already 140 words, so 200 words every day are hopefully manageable. You're more than welcome to join me if you like 😊
no, that’s a mandrake. The Mandalorian was an equal rights activist who was assassinated in the ‘60s.
the mandalorian? isn’t that bitch the powerhouse of the cell?
Best friends to lovers
Evil character becomes good
Character become brainwashed and forced to fight their friends
More about a character is revealed after their death
Misunderstood character’s backstory is revealed that explains everything
Goofy cinnamon roll is actually the baddest badass
Stoic character A has a soft spot for character B
Chaotic/comedic duo/trio
“Mean girl” is actually cool and becomes best friends with main girl
Traitor was actually on the good side all along
Powerless character finally reveals secret powers that have been foreshadowed all along
Any epiphany or eureka moment
Former hero slowly descends into madness and darkness
Character A reveals feelings for character B when character B is extremely hurt or upset
Former enemies forgive/accept each other
Any more tropes? Please add on!
~Raebelle
taking each other’s hands during a stressful situation, instantly reliveing the pressure of the situation
smiling in-between kisses
during a hug, one of them pulls the other closer, followed by the other one nudging their head into the crook of their lover’s neck
forehead kisses
they’re in bed, one of them’s like “it’s time to get up” and their lover pulls them back down, wraps their hands around their body, snuggles up close, preventing the other one from getting out of bed
forehead kisses but it’s the male being kissed on the head
dancing together, one of them takes the other’s hand, kisses it
saying “i love you” completely randomly
bantering, judging each other but in a way that’s like, what you’re doing right now, is really stupid, but you’re adorable and i can’t help but love you
when one of them is like… i don’t know… hurt or something… and the other one is just like… tending to their wounds… and then just like… wrap them into their arms… thankful that they’re alive…
when one of them is hurt by the antagonist… and their lover goes… absolutely ballistic and does everything in their power to get to the person they love, to the point in which the antagonist and it’s crew have to physically restrain them… and it still doesn’t stop them… they jsut keep kicking… doesn’t matter what happens to them… doesn’t matter if they get beaten in the process… as long as their lover is safe…
when they haven’t seen each other for a while (bonus point if they’re not sure the other one is alive) and all this time they’ve been trying to stay strong, but when they reunite, they crash into each other’s arms, and completely breakdown…
“i’m not worthy of anybody’s love.” “that’s not true, you’re worthy of mine.” followed by the lover breaking eye-contact… + a love confession
when one of them has never had a proper birthday party for whatever reason, and their lover makes it their mission to give them the best day ever, followed by “you didn’t have to do all this for me. just being with you is enough.” “i know. but i thought you deserved ?’’ and their lover smiles, a kiss is shared
one of them being like… i’m totally getting off track here, but you’re like, really hot so i’m going to pick you up and throw you on the bed, followed by their lover smacking them on their head (gently) because they have important things to do
’‘you shouldn’t be here.” “i had to make sure you were okay.” silence. “can i come in?” more silence. you decide. angst or happy ending?
when they’re forced apart, and they get to say goodbye, and they cry, share a last kiss, holding hands until the very end, until they’re so far apart they have to let go…
any form of physical intimacy ever
one of them resting their head on the other’s lap, falling asleep
wearing their lover’s clothes! (also, “can I get my shirt back? ’'no.”)
being jealous! not to the point of it being unhealthy, just a moderate amount of cute jealously, in which their partner just laughs it off and gives them a kiss
a slow burn being like… i’m not in love with them! cut to scene of the person in question staring dreamingly at the object of their desire
when a character is falling in love, and their love interest is making them smile, and they’re flustered, blushing, in such a happy state of mind that they look to the ground, trying to hide their burning red cheeks
banter in which one of them’s like… “i love you” and the other person’s like “ok” and the first one’s like “say it back” and the other one’s just like “no 😝” and the first one gets frustrated because “why wouldn’t you say it back we always say i love you before we leave”
when they’re doing something outside, it’s dark outside, and one of them views something pretty in the sky, like a shooting star, or just the stars in general, and they pull their lover by the hand, all excited to watch the shooting star, and their lover looks at them in pure admiration
when it’s a slow burn, and the characters just look at each other like “fuck it i’m done with this” and kiss
edit: The character thinking “seriously? I love them?!!’’ because somebody reblogged the post saying that and it did something special to my heart
Saw a post like this with negative outlook so I asked for it to be fixed
A Study In Physical Injury
Comas
Medical Facts And Tips For Your Writing Needs
Broken Bones
Burns
Unconsciousness & Head Trauma
Blood Loss
Stab Wounds
Pain & Shock
All About Mechanical Injuries (Injuries Caused By Violence)
Portraying a kleptomaniac.
Playing a character with cancer.
How to portray a power driven character.
Playing the manipulative character.
Portraying a character with borderline personality disorder.
Playing a character with Orthorexia Nervosa.
Writing a character who lost someone important.
Playing the bullies.
Portraying the drug dealer.
Playing a rebellious character.
How to portray a sociopath.
How to write characters with PTSD.
Playing characters with memory loss.
Playing a pyromaniac.
How to write a mute character.
How to write a character with an OCD.
How to play a stoner.
Playing a character with an eating disorder.
Portraying a character who is anti-social.
Portraying a character who is depressed.
How to portray someone with dyslexia.
How to portray a character with bipolar disorder.
Portraying a character with severe depression.
How to play a serial killer.
Writing insane characters.
Playing a character under the influence of marijuana.
Tips on writing a drug addict.
How to write a character with HPD.
Writing a character with Nymphomania.
Writing a character with schizophrenia.
Writing a character with Dissociative Identity Disorder.
Writing a character with depression.
Writing a character who suffers from night terrors.
Writing a character with paranoid personality disorder.
How to play a victim of rape.
How to play a mentally ill/insane character.
Writing a character who self-harms.
Writing a character who is high on amphetamines.
How to play the stalker.
How to portray a character high on cocaine.
Playing a character with ADHD.
How to play a sexual assault victim.
Writing a compulsive gambler.
Playing a character who is faking a disorder.
Playing a prisoner.
Portraying an emotionally detached character.
How to play a character with social anxiety.
Portraying a character who is high.
Portraying characters who have secrets.
Portraying a recovering alcoholic.
Portraying a sex addict.
How to play someone creepy.
Portraying sexually/emotionally abused characters.
Playing a character under the influence of drugs.
Playing a character who struggles with Bulimia.
Examining Mob Mentality
How Street Gangs Work
Domestic Abuse
Torture
Assault
Murder
Terrorism
Internet Fraud
Cyberwarfare
Computer Viruses
Corporate Crime
Political Corruption
Drug Trafficking
Human Trafficking
Sex Trafficking
Illegal Immigration
Contemporary Slavery
AK-47 prices on the black market
Bribes
Computer Hackers and Online Fraud
Contract Killing
Exotic Animals
Fake Diplomas
Fake ID Cards, Passports and Other Identity Documents
Human Smuggling Fees
Human Traffickers Prices
Kidney and Organ Trafficking Prices
Prostitution Prices
Cocaine Prices
Ecstasy Pills Prices
Heroin Prices
Marijuana Prices
Meth Prices
Earnings From Illegal Jobs
Countries In Order Of Largest To Smallest Risk
arson
Asphyxia
Blood Analysis
Book Review
Cause & Manner of Death
Chemistry/Physics
Computers/Cell Phones/Electronics
Cool & Odd-Mostly Odd
Corpse Identification
Corpse Location
Crime and Science Radio
crime lab
Crime Scene
Cults and Religions
DNA
Document Examination
Fingerprints/Patterned Evidence
Firearms Analysis
Forensic Anthropology
Forensic Art
Forensic Dentistry
Forensic History
Forensic Psychiatry
General Forensics
Guest Blogger
High Tech Forensics
Interesting Cases
Interesting Places
Interviews
Medical History
Medical Issues
Misc
Multiple Murderers
On This Day
Poisons & Drugs
Police Procedure
Q&A
serial killers
Space Program
Stupid Criminals
Theft
Time of Death
Toxicology
Trauma
Yo. I write high fantasy, and I feed off prompts. I have several wips because I can't ever focus on one thing. I rarely post but I plan to post more.
My dash is void of writeblr content, so please interact if you are an active writeblr and I will follow you!
What I'm looking for:
memes
wip content
oc content
I'm interested in most genres except horror/gore
bonus points if you have supernatural/paranormal or sci-fi elements