Thediagnosedweeb - The Diagnosed Weeb

Once a month

They tell me it’s a woman's dream/an ancestral right passed down from mother to daughter

A fever lights beneath my skin/red orchids stretching and blooming on my shoulders and back

The great goddesses would smile and kiss my head for this/but I wish they would take it back

The moon with her eternal smirk dances with me/i feel just like the tide, thrown from side to side

My body shakes like a kicked dog/the tremors spread and the entire world seems to quiver as well

I do not feel like myself/ my mother fixes my clothes and tells me that's just how it is

I want to kill myself mother is that just how it is too/it’s not real, it’s just like a dehydration mirage in the desert she tells me

I wail and mother laughs at my dramatics/does she delight in the shared suffering we now have?

I want to cut open my stomach to strangle the snakes writhing in it/mother tells me she's afraid of snakes

I come to my father on my knees like a begging man/this is a woman’s matter he says as he turns his head

When I cry about my miserable existence asking for it’s justification/he says the same as my mother, it’s not real

There is not enough air in the world/but my “sisters” tell me to just breathe, like telling a dead man to still love

I take the tablets/the pills/the capsules/the pellets/the medicine/and I weep like i’ve never known tenderness

I tell God i’ll finally go to church if he takes the pain away and when he doesn’t/i say i’ll start worshiping Satan

I feel like a melancholic girl from the 1800s/banished to the countryside for hysteria 

I wish I was hysteric/i wish someone could give me a prescription of living on the land 

The little control I still have/i wrestle with like I’m a child trying to keep my favorite toy 

The moon waxes and wanes as a crawl on the floor/a wounded bleeding animal

This is womanhood they say, this is punishment/take it back take it back take it back

The resentments and bitterness slip past my lips like puke/isn’t this beautiful, don’t you feel beautiful

I do not want this girlhood, this femininity/give me barren fields and an empty life

I sit with my “sisters” as we talk about Aunt Flow/in this we are a witch covenant bound only by mutual pain

I wish I could give away this regift of living as it was regifted to me/but there is only one way to do that

I feel bruised, achey, and weak/i wish someone would hold me

But mother says it’s natural/and father says to toughen up 

I am already so small/why must you make me smaller?

thanks spotify wrapped

i think star trek will stay with me forever.

it has injected me with a permanent joy and whimsy and helped me unlearn shame/cringe culture. most importantly, it makes me see the good in humanity.

star trek has affected me in ways i never knew media could affect me. it keeps me optimistic about humanity’s future, and inspires me to do what is right no matter what. star trek makes me unashamed to be myself, however nerdy or silly I may be.

star trek is so important to me and i have a feeling it always will be.

No no listennnn it’s the way Obi-Wan drags out the first ‘a’ in Anakin’s name. It’s the way everyone else ignores the hyphen in Obi-Wan’s name and runs it all together but Anakin pronounces every syllable slowly and clearly. It’s how Anakin was the only constant in Obi-Wan’s life from the time Qui-Gon died, how he threw all of his energy into keeping Anakin safe and sheltered, because he’d already seen too many horrors as a slave. It’s about how Anakin went to Obi-Wan’s room every night for a year because he was afraid he would disappear like Qui-Gon and his mom, and Obi-Wan lost sleep because he doesn’t know how to swim. It’s how Anakin grumbled and complained about Obi-Wan’s teaching to others because his feelings were so muddled and confused and yet he would die for him in a heartbeat and thrived on his approval. How Anakin, hours after losing his mom horrifically and suddenly, threw himself into a battle with Count Dooku on Geonosis and lost his arm to save Obi-Wan because he couldn’t lose him too. How Obi-Wan tried to steer Anakin from attachment but in the process became irrevocably attached himself, admitting multiple times to loving Anakin, passing down the gift his own Master gave him for his birthday years ago that meant nothing to Obi-Wan when he got it but meant everything to Anakin because it was from Obi-Wan, holding onto Anakin’s lightsaber and cloak when all else of him was lost, taking care of his children because they were living pieces of him. It’s that they called each other and asked after the other constantly when they’re apart during the Clone Wars. It’s that Ahsoka was technically Anakin’s Padawan but they thought of her as theirs and she called them her parents to others. It’s the little things like Anakin modifying Obi-Wan’s R4 droid to look like his own R2 unit. It’s the big things like them being able to sense one another from lightyears away even after Anakin turns. It’s Obi-Wan willfully turning a blind eye to Anakin’s violations of the code because he wanted him to be happy more than he wanted him to be a good Jedi. Anakin still referring to him as “Master” even after their apprenticeship is over, to their last battle; Anakin wishing that Obi-Wan would stay with him in his time of need rather than go to fight General Grievous and end the war; that they were the greatest Jedi to live, at the end of the age of heroes, “the best for last” and they were so insanely, disgustingly, beyond attached despite the Code’s teachings on what made a Jedi good, and they were the best. They were the best because they were together. Because they were Kenobi and Skywalker and that became one name, the name of the Open Circle Fleet, name of the greatest duo the Jedi had ever seen. I consider almost nothing from the sequel trilogy canon EXCEPT for the force dyad because you can’t tell me they weren’t one and never even knew because that was just how they were. They just figured they matched each other’s freak too hard. That’s just them.

Yeah.

“do you write for work or just for fun” none of the above. this activity is neither profitable nor enjoyable

“Anderson argues that Louis did not enter his romantic relationship with Armand out of spite — he feels there was a genuine love between them, and Armand represented a “calmer” and potentially more healthy partner than Lestat ever was.” - The Hollywood Reporter

“I think Louis has something else that lights a fire inside Armand again…He’s enthralled and enraptured by Louis at this point, definitely, for sure.” - Assad Zaman, Autumn Brown Interview

“Vampires are the most human monsters. They really desperately want this happiness, and to be fulfilled. And Louis finds that with Armand, certainly, in episode 4.” - Adam O’Byrne, Episode Insider

“Lestat has never gone away. Lestat is there to pass judgement on decisions that Louis is making, and one of those is his falling in love with Armand.” - Mark Johnson, Episode Insider

“There’s an inevitability about Armand for Louis. It’s like, ‘he’s nice to me.’…as Louis sees it, Armand is not without complication, but is nowhere near as messy as Lestat…With Armand, it’s like ‘we can coexist nicely, and I care about you’…Lestat is his great love. I think he does love Armand, but in a different way.” - Jacob Anderson, Collider

“This is a new dynamic for Louis and Armand together as a couple, but also, Armand's relationship with his coven because of the choice he's made in choosing love, in choosing his pursuit and happiness with Louis.” - Assad Zaman, Entertainment

“For Armand, I think in that moment, that’s Louis seeing Armand for the child that he is, for the sort of innocent that he is, and that’s what makes Armand melt…He kind of sees Louis as his protector.” - Assad Zaman, Katie O’Shaughnessy Interview

“This is really representing Louis letting go of Lestat so he can move on and build a relationship and new persona with Armand.” - Sam Reid, TV Guide

“Armand is seemingly calmer, and kind of a more, I think, gentle creature.” - Jacob Anderson, 92NY Panel

“I think he also got into that relationship knowing that there was an edge to Armand, but he kind of just chose to focus on the sides of him that were gentle and sweet and seemingly the opposite of any of the relationships that he’s had so far.” - Jacob Anderson, TV Insider

“Louis has such a curiosity and zest for life, still, and curiosity about the purpose, and I think Armand has lost that, or keeps losing it…I think there’s a light in Louis that, I don’t know if Armand understands what it is, but he just wants it, he just wants it because it keeps him going.” - Assad Zaman, ATX TV Festival

“But I think that scene in Magnus’ dungeon tower is the beginning of the spike in Louis and Armand’s relationship. I think he continues the relationship with Armand out of spite for the next 70 years.” - Jacob Anderson, The Hollywood Reporter

“…Everybody in the room relives their worst fight with someone they shouldn’t have been in love with but wanted to be; that’s the episode you come up with.” - Rolin Jones, Vulture

“The real tragedy of Armand is that even with Louis, he hasn’t fully given himself, shown himself, and revealed himself. I think, if you can’t be true to yourself and to the person you claim to love the most, if they can’t trust you to be authentic, how can you ever really be authentic?” - Assad Zaman, Autumn Brown Interview

i am so tire.....booped too close to the sun

Body Language Cheat Sheet For Writers 

╰ Facial expressions

These are your micro-signals, like the blinking neon signs of the soul. But they’re small, quick, and often lie harder than words.

Raised eyebrows — This can mean surprise or disbelief, sure. But it can also be a full-on, silent “Are you serious right now?” when someone’s being ridiculous. Or even curiosity when someone’s too emotionally repressed to askthe damn question.

Furrowed brow — That face people make when they’re doing long division in their head or trying to emotionally process a compliment. It’s thinking, yes—but also confusion, deep frustration, or quiet simmering rage.

Smiling — Can be happiness… or total fake-it-till-you-make-it energy. Some smiles are stiff. Some don’t reach the eyes. Show that.

Frowning — Sure, sadness. But also: disappointment, judgment, or the universal “I’m about to say something blunt, brace yourself.”

Lip biting — It’s not just nervousness, it’s pressure. Self-control. Anticipation. It’s the thing people do when they want to say something and decide, at the last second, not to.

╰ Eye movement

The window to the soul? Yeah. But also the window to when someone’s lying, flirting, or deeply trying not to cry in public.

Eye contact — Confidence or challenge. Eye contact can be gentle, curious, sharp like a blade. Sometimes it’s desperate: “Please understand me.”

Avoiding eye contact — Not always guilt. Sometimes it’s protectiveness. Sometimes it’s “I’m afraid if I look at you, you’ll see everything I’m trying to hide.”

Narrowed eyes — Calculating. Suspicious. The look someone gives when their brain’s saying “hmmm...” and it’s not a good hmm.

Wide eyes — Surprise, yes. But also sudden fear. The oh-God-it’s-happening look. Or when someone just found out they’re not as in control as they thought.

Eye roll — Classic. But try using it with tension, like when someone’s annoyed and trying very hard not to lose it in public.

╰ Gestures

This is where characters’ emotions go when their mouths are lying.

Crossing arms — Not just defensive. Sometimes it’s comfort. A self-hug. A barrier when the conversation is getting too personal.

Fidgeting — This is nervous energy with nowhere to go. Watch fingers tapping, rings spinning, sleeves tugged. It says: I’m not okay, but I’m trying not to show it.

Pointing — It’s a stab in the air. Aggressive, usually. But sometimes a desperate plea: Look. Understand this.

Open palms — Vulnerability. Honesty. Or a gesture that says, “I have nothing left to hide.”

Hand on chin — Not just thinking. It’s stalling. It’s delaying. It’s “I’m about to say something that might get me in trouble.”

╰ Posture and movement

These are your vibes. How someone occupies space says everything.

Slumped shoulders — Exhaustion. Defeat. Or someone trying to take up less space because they feel small.

Upright posture — Not always confidence. Sometimes it’s forced. Sometimes it’s a character trying really, really hard to look like they’re fine.

Pacing — Inner chaos externalized. Thinking so loudly it needs movement. Waiting for something. Running from your own thoughts.

Tapping foot — Tension. Irritation. Sometimes a buildup to an explosion.

Leaning in — Intimacy. Interest. Or subtle manipulation. (You matter to me. I’m listening. Let’s get closer.)

╰ Touch

This is intimacy in all its forms, comforting, protective, romantic, or invasive.

Hugging — Doesn’t always mean closeness. Could be a goodbye. Could be an apology they can’t say out loud. Could be awkward as hell.

Handshake — Stiff or crushing or slippery. How someone shakes hands says more than their words do.

Back patting — Casual warmth. Bro culture. Awkward emotional support when someone doesn’t know how to comfort but wants to try.

Clenched fists — Holding something in. Rage, tears, restraint. Fists mean tension that needs somewhere to go.

Hair tuck — Sure, flirtation or nerves. But also a subtle shield. A way to hide. A habit from childhood when someone didn’t want to be seen.

╰ Mirroring:

If two characters start syncing their body language, something is happening. Empathy. Chemistry. Shared grief. If someone shifts their body when the other does? Take notice. Other human bits that say everything without words...

Nodding — Not just yes. Could be an “I hear you,” even if they don’t agree. Could be the “keep going” nod. Could be patronizing if done too slow.

Crossed legs — Chill. Casual. Or closed-off, depending on context. Especially if their arms are crossed too.

Finger tapping — Time is ticking. Brain is pacing. Something’s coming.

Hand to chest — Sincerity, yes. But also shock. Or grounding—a subconscious attempt to stay present when everything feels like too much.

Tilting the head — Curiosity. Playfulness. Or someone listening so hard they forget to hide it.

Temple rub — “I can’t deal.” Could be physical pain. Could be stress. Could be emotional overload in disguise.

Chin stroking — Your classic “I’m judging you politely.” Often used in arguments between characters pretending to be calm.

Hands behind the back — Authority. Control. Or rigid fear masked as control.

Leaning body — This is the body betraying the brain. A tilt toward someone means they care—even if their words are cold.

Nail biting — Classic anxiety. But also habit. Something learned. Sometimes people bite because that’s how they self-soothe.

Squinting — Focusing. Doubting. Suspicion without confrontation.

Shifting weight — Uncomfortable. Unsure. Someone who wants to leave but doesn’t.

Covering the mouth — Guilt. Hesitation. The “should I say this?” moment before something big drops.

Body language is more honest than dialogue. If you really want to show your character’s internal world, don’t just give them lines. Give them a hand that won’t stop shaking. Give them a foot that won’t stop bouncing. Give them a mouth that smiles when their eyes don’t. And if you’re not sure what your character would do in a moment of fear, or love, or heartbreak, try acting it out yourself. Seriously. Get weird. Feel what your body does. Then write that down.

sometimes you need dialogue tags and don't want to use the same four

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