It’s Wild To Me That I Can Get So Overwhelmed That I Can’t Feel A Literal Knife Cutting Into My Flesh

When did "Suicide is still an option" become a comforting thought ?

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Reposting this because I need more.

Genshin RP

This might be a long shot, but would anybody be the Bennett to my Razor?

I can write a lot, and I primarily use Discord. Any theme is acceptable. I would like to headcannon and get to know my partner, too. I can even text in character or play the game in character with you.

Like this post or send me a DM if interested!

(I am 18+, so preferably 16+)

Minor inconvenience:

Me: how about i end up in the fucking hospital how about that

I may not be the prettiest or the smartest girl in the room, but I’m definitely the most mentally ill.

Daddy Issues: Rambling #10

18th April 2022, 00:46

Rambling 10. How coincidental that I write about my father on the same number that is my birthday. Anyway, I have a problem that is very taboo. It concerns incest. I believe my father may have molested me as a child, but I cannot remember. My father did a lot of sketchy, sexual things when I was younger, but I can never remember them directly. My sister believes the same. It can’t just be my imagination. He did something, I just wish I could uncover what. I know it is my brain protecting me, but I just crave to know. I hate being none the wiser to things. I digress, that’s not the fucked up part. The fucked up part is now, whenever I’m masturbating, I picture my father raping me when I’m a child of maybe 6 or 7 years old. I like to pretend he’s touching me and comforting me that it’s “okay” and that “what I’m feeling is normal”. I pretend that he gets hard at the thought of me. I know what his penis looks like, I remember it hanging out his boxers when he was sleeping. I also remember momentarily touching myself to the sight of it, but stopping from the taboo. I don’t know what it is about my father that turns me on. I know it’s definitely a stockholm type of symptom, a consequence of sexual abuse, but I don’t know how to get rid of it. I’m not attracted to my father. He’s fat and ugly. Nothing, not a single thing, about him is attractive to me. Still, I can’t stop thinking about him overpowering me, or putting his penis in me while I’m sleeping. Whenever I have these thoughts, and especially if I cum to them, I have to wash myself afterwards. Sometimes I wash myself so many times that my skin turns red and blotchy. I feel disgusting. I feel like he has taken my virginity and yet, to my knowledge, I’m a virgin. Why is my mind corrupted by him like this? I haven’t seen him in years. The power he has over me is astounding. I wish he would just die both physically and inside my head. Leave me alone. Leave my body alone. I was just a child. I didn’t deserve that. I don’t deserve this.

~ 化け猫 (Bakeneko)

Psalm 58:6

seems like a good fucking day to 0d, do drvgs, or cvt

fuck it, why not all at once???

feeling miserable because your hungry>>>>>>feeling miserable because you ate