POV: Ur Watching The Naruto Sasuke Reunion. It’s Been Three Years. Sasuke Chooses The Sluttiest Shirt

POV: Ur Watching The Naruto Sasuke Reunion. It’s Been Three Years. Sasuke Chooses The Sluttiest Shirt
POV: Ur Watching The Naruto Sasuke Reunion. It’s Been Three Years. Sasuke Chooses The Sluttiest Shirt
POV: Ur Watching The Naruto Sasuke Reunion. It’s Been Three Years. Sasuke Chooses The Sluttiest Shirt
POV: Ur Watching The Naruto Sasuke Reunion. It’s Been Three Years. Sasuke Chooses The Sluttiest Shirt
POV: Ur Watching The Naruto Sasuke Reunion. It’s Been Three Years. Sasuke Chooses The Sluttiest Shirt

POV: ur watching the naruto sasuke reunion. it’s been three years. sasuke chooses the sluttiest shirt possible. leans the whole front half of his body against naruto in front of three random ppl for no reason. sasuke starts to pull out his blade, and naruto just. stands there. challenges him. almost as if to say “i know you. i know you won’t do it. you spared me that first time. i know it wasn’t on a whim.” and u can see, sasuke looks at naruto from the corner of his eye, unmoving, wondering if naruto will flinch or attack or make a move. sasuke kinda doesn’t want him to. they’re challenging each other. sasuke being like “are you afraid of me” and naruto saying “no i am not afraid of you. i know you still.” so sasuke swings the blade. sai comes in, almost immediately. but naruto doesn’t block sasuke’s sword. in fact, the only hand that naruto raises is his right fist, blocking sai’s tanto blade from touching sasuke at all. naruto protects sasuke. he isn’t afraid of sasuke. he knows he wouldn’t have done it.

AND THEN. you hear sasuke tell naruto, “that block you chose… was the right one.” naruto! had the choice! it was either block sasuke’s blade from stabbing him, or block sai’s blade from hitting sasuke. naruto chose to save sasuke over himself. but can you really blame him! no! this was him telling sasuke “i know you. i am still putting my life in your hands. please be careful. please prove me right.” and sasuke, now knowing naruto’s choice to protect him, says back “you were right. i put my life in your hands, too.”

and that’s it!! the arc is love! the arc is i choose you i still know you i am dressing up in my sluttiest outfit just to feel you close and you could never hurt me and i could never hurt you no matter how close we get to it physically because it is the only language we have learned i would never ever really hurt you. i couldn’t live with myself if i did. the end.

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Idk if anyone else remembers, but Batman canonically carries around Bat-cookies according to the Batman/Scooby-Doo crossover.

I LOVE to think Batman carries them around as snacks for Robin. I love it even more to think he uses said cookies to bribe Robin into good behavior in a similar fashion to Scooby Snacks.

Little Dick Grayson: I don't wanna go to some stupid Gala! U can't make me!

Bruce, in desperation: would u do it for a bat-cookie?

Dick: woah! Bat-shaped! Cool!

Bruce: andddd you can have another one after the party

Dick, mouth full of cookie: okay :)

Bruce, internally: thank fuck a parenting hack that works

Batman: stop! Don't kill him!

Red Hood: and why do I give a fuck what you-

Batman: would u spare his life for a Bat-cookie?

Red Hood:

Red Hood: I'm not a kid anymore-

Batman: they're fresh, look, still warm

Red Hood: ...

Red Hood: this works ONCE. This ONE time. Gimme that damn cookie.

Batman: of course

Red Hood: Fuck I've missed these what the hell does Alfred put in em

Bruce: go to sleep, Tim

Tim: I'm almost done-

Bruce: go to sleep now and you can have a bat-cookie

Tim: a what?

Bruce: a bat-cookie. See? Here, first taste is free. Try it.

Tim: bribery? Really?

Bruce: positive reinforcement

Tim: giving me treats like I'm some kind of dog?

Bruce: try it and then we'll debate the ethics

Tim [eats cookie]:

Tim:

Tim: okay

Bruce: Okay?

Tim: if I promise to sleep a full 8 hours I want two more and a glass of milk

Bruce: u drive a hard bargain but I accept

Dick: aw, c'mon, Damian. One picture. For me, to remember your first day of high school. Do it for a bat-cookie?

Damian: -tt- I've heard of these so-called "bat-cookies" Insulting. I am not a child. I refuse to participate in such an asinine tradition.

Dick: shame. Alfred made animal-friendly ones so you can share with Ace and Batcow. I guess they don't get any treats either, then

Damian: well

Damian: since it would please you so very much, I will overlook this patronizing lapse in judgment

Damian [tries one bite of cookie]:

Damian:

Damian: given Batcows higher food intake requirements, I will require at least a dozen.

Damian [takes another bite]: perhaps two dozen

Duke: you agree I did a good job today?

Bruce: yes? I suppose. Earlier, when you stopped that-

Duke: shut it. Don't care. Cookie me.

Bruce: excuse me?

Duke: I know about the cookies, old man. You've been holding out on me. The cat's out of the bag. I did a good job, I get a cookie. That's how it works, right?

Bruce: uh well

Bruce: that was a long time ago

Bruce: i had to discontinue that method after-

Duke: are you saying I'm not a valid member of this family because I was never Robin?

Bruce: of course you are! But I don't have any on me-

Duke: don't. Lie. To. Me.

Bruce: Okay! Okay. You're right, I'm sorry. Here, take it. Just... do me a favor, and don't go announcing to the whole cave you got-

Duke: YES. MY FIRST BAT-COOKIE! SCORE!

Every batmember in the vicinity: BAT-COOKIES ARE BACK????

Bruce: NO! stay back! Stay back you animals! Alfred! Alfred! It's happening again-

Alfred, sighing: I'll preheat the oven, sir

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