Twistybat - Twistybat

To the trans person reading this,

You are worthy, you are valid and you are loved. You matter so so much, and if you are in a enviroment that is not good for your health, I hope you get to be somewhere better soon. I hope you have people that support you, but if you haven’t yet, know that there are people out there who will love and support you. There are people out there with warm hearts and gentle eyes that will welcome you into their lives with open arms and always have a spot for you at the table. You deserve to live a full and authentic life. 🌸

AWWW! 💓

s/o to the artists on tumblr that spend hours making art and only get three notes if theyre lucky. youre still awesome and your art is still fantastic

Graffiti in Rockville, Maryland in memory of 23-year old Saudi trans woman Eden Knight.

Eden died after being forcibly detransitioned in Saudi Arabia, after being trafficked from the US by a security contractor named Michael Pocalyko.

Rest in peace Eden

Transphobes will not win

💓

How abusive childhood teaches you to stay in abusive relationships:

you have to be obedient and submissive in your childhood if you don’t want to get beaten, you’re taught this is normal in life, so why should you doubt it when it happens in your relationship?

you’re supposed to care about everyone else more than yourself, you’re taught to provide comfort and be minimally or completely non-demanding of other family members, always put yourself last, and this is exactly what abusive partner will demand of you as well, how would you fight it if you’re taught this is just your place in life?

your appearance, interests, skills, achievements, and faults are constantly exposed to criticism, insults, humiliation and ridicule in abusive childhood, and you’re taught it’s normal, how are you supposed to fight it when it happens in a relationship?

you’re humiliated and ridiculed for seeking intimacy or try to express yourself in your childhood, how would you know it’s okay for you to desire understanding, consideration, reassurance and intimacy in your relationship?

if you’re used to being hit, humiliated, and having your objections to it ignored, or even worse, minimized and punished by even worse violence, how are you supposed to defend yourself when it happens in a sexual situation? how would you be able to know it’s wrong for another person to harm you if your parents have been doing it, and they supposedly love you?

if you’re taught to always be grateful that things aren’t worse, always compare yourself to someone who is tortured worse, how are you ever supposed to reach out and get help for being abused? how are you supposed to know when your situation is really, really bad? There’s always going to be someone somewhere in the world tortured worse, and this becomes a reason for you to suffer in silence.

Abusive parents are direct cause of abusive relationships, if your boundaries aren’t destroyed and your sense of what’s acceptable and to be tolerated in your close relationships skewed to allow abuse, you have much easier time rejecting abusive relationships later in life. 

For anyone who believes abuse is normal, inevitable, necessary, good to 'toughen you up' or something you deserved:

There are children out there who were never asked to accept 'tough love' as love. They've been given affection, acknowledgment, gentleness, consideration and care. And they're healthy and happy for it. They're not struggling to feel worthy of having their needs fulfilled. They are not weak, and they do not struggle with feeling weak for having a human need.

There are children out there who have done and said things, much worse than you've said and done, who've been forgiven. Their parents, or caretakers, understood they were kids, and that their intentions were those of a child, and forgave them without punishment, understanding that children need to be safe before being convenient. These children did not end up doing worse things. They grew up knowing compassion and not being scared their actions might bring unimaginable consequences.

There are children raised with a concept of freedom, who could choose their actions without worrying about being inconvenient or punished. There are children whose choices are supported, whose achievements are celebrated, and their chosen life path is lit up by the care and resources their families help provide to them. They don't have to live in secret. They don't have to feel ashamed about what they want. They don't need to do it all alone. They don't life in fear of failure.

There are parents out there who understand their role is to make their child protected and healthy. There are parents who never even thought about hitting their kids. There are parents who will do anything to prevent their child going thru the horrors of violence, aggression, someone lashing out at them, threats or abuse. These children walk the world feeling safer, like they belong, their humanity and feelings protected from harm.

There is a whole world out there that believes no child has deserved any of this harm. Only some people do these things to kids, only some people try to convince kids that these are 'good' things, or deserved things. They are not.

You deserved safety, dignity and grace growing up too. You deserved more than the hollow 'tough love' which was merely an excuse for not giving you the care you deserved. You would have turned out just fine. Abuse wasn't necessary, it wasn't normal, and it didn't help you. And it was avoidable. Nobody ever had to do any of that to you.

if you’re worried things won’t get better, here’s your sign that they will.

Inktober #10

Back to my slasher movie roots

I'm Sorry - Gator Days