Another #paleostream Sketch

I was a professional juggler for like five years and all of my friends politely pretend it never happened.

Tumblr post: hey this is a point I want to make

A response: ok but I really I want to make the exact opposite point about this and I’m gonna do it on your post instead of making my own

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*Speaking quickly* So before Halloween I decided to get online and try to look for some abandoned cemeteries.

So I ended up finding one but it was in the middle of the woods so I decided to just plug some coordinates and take a chance. And I found something a helluva lot scary.

As I am walking the path to find this abandoned cemetery, um… *voice getting louder* Hands! Hands! Everywhere!!

By now you’re probably thinking to yourself, easyise, hands don’t just crawl what are you talking about? You would be correct.

Um- SPIDERS! FUCKING SPIDERS! DRACULARACHNIDS THE SIZE OF MY FUCKING HAND!!!

So after pissing myself and driving home, uh- I came home and looked it up on the internet and found exactly what it was I saw.

*Louder voice but not quite yelling* And here it is fam! Uh people like to call ‘em golden silk orb weaver *voice getting louder* but I like to call them NIGHTMARE FUEL DIPPED IN YELLOW FUCKING PAINT.

*Yelling* YOU SEE THE UNHOLY SIZE OF- THERE IS NOTHING AMAZING ABOUT THAT ON YOUR FACE!!

WHAT KIND OF ALIEN VS PREDATOR SCP SATAN SHIT-

IS THAT ONE EATING A FUCKING BIRD?!?!

THIS THING IS LIKE VOLDEMORT FUCKED A DEMAGORGON BUT SURE LET’S PUT IT ON A GREETING CARD!!!

*In a incredulous tone* SATAN DOESN’T EXIST?!?! THEN WHY WAS I MET WITH A FOREST-FUL OF THIS SHIT?

CHECKMATE ATHEISTS!

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How Animals Eat Their Food

SAY HELLO TO MY BOY

HIS NAME IS HERBERT AND I MADE HIM AND I LOVE HIM VERY MUCH he chillin’ on my shrimp tank :3

how to make ur own herbert with a bendy straw

people slipping up and saying shit like “biological name” instead of “deadname” is more or less proof these people don’t actually care about real science they just want smart sounding words and i guarantee if we could manipulate chromosomes they’d abandon all pretext of science and start yammering about how people are born with a “masculine/feminine essence” that “cant be changed” like none of these people actually know the chromosomes real fuckin function and they dont care they just know they cant be changed

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I have decided that I am no longer scared of spiders. Come at me you freaky motherfuckers.

I’m assuming that this is how metal lee was made

Or

In which I haven’t drawn anything in over a year and it definitely shows