SHNANKS

Yasopp: Oh hey it's my kid! Haha we should visit him!

Shanks: no.. not the time

*Time passes.*

Yasopp: Wow look my kid's doing well, I wanna see him.

Shanks: Cool

*More time passes*

Yasopp: Hey my kid is literally right there we can-

Shanks: no

HES SO UGLY

I need to kick him or something someone put peepaw down he looks like old yeller

Had this written for a while but decided to post it finally so here.

Scent

Shanks x Male Reader. Shanks has a pussy, omegaverse. Filth because i have dirty thoughts.

Omega Shanks with an oral/face fixation. Loves to ride your face and slick himself up as much as he can till it’s dripping onto the mattress. Your face is what people look at the most, after all. Goes the other way around too, loves looking pretty on his knees when he sucks you off, looking up at you with twinkling but lustful brown eyes. “Like my eyes? I only look like this with you, you know.” He says lovingly with a wink while he jerks you off the rest of the way, opening his mouth with his tongue slightly out and the corners of his mouth curled up in a cheeky smile. All so you can cum all over his face and tongue. He rubs it over his face happily afterwards, pouting if you say it’s weird. “Just want people to know we love eachother~♡.” Shanks coos to you, making kissy faces. It’s not that he gets jealous, he trusts you, but he can get a bit possessive. No no, not of you, he gets possessive for you. He’s a popular man, he knows that, and he wants people that ever try and kiss him on the cheek or get too close to him to know that he’s all scented up by you. That if they choose to kiss him that they’ll be kissing a part of you too. He always gets a stupid grin on his face when they realize, “Just lovin my boyfriend, ya don’t mind, right?” He’ll say cheekily. The same with you, if someone tries to hit on you they’ll be “kissin my juices”. You two already scent eachother’s necks any chance you get, and sure maybe you could leave scents in other ways, but that’s no fun.

I GET THERES TIMEZONES BUT HOW IS IT ALREADY THE NEXT DAY FOR PEOPLE ITS STILL THE 8TH FOR ME IS SHANKS BIRTHDAY NOT TOMORROW??

I am here

I hate angst but i keep writing it in my stories why do i do that

Forgot to say this but I want ya'll to know I actually came up with this joke while I was in a hospital waiting room for a sprained ankle and I found it so funny I physically had to cover my mouth to muffle my laughs. When I got home I still laughed.

Boredom and Jokes

Mihawk x reader/Buggy x reader. Can be read platonically or romantic but platonic in mind. Reader is younger than both of them. 421 wordcount

“bbb… bbbppt… bbbptt” You make noises with your mouth, hanging out with Mihawk. It was just you and Buggy at first but you wanted to visit Mihawk and dragged a reluctant Buggy along. So you and Buggy lay there, him sitting on the chair while you lay on the ground starfish style. As you continue to make noises with your mouth, Mihawk finally looks up from his book.

“Do you need something?” He asks, eyes narrowed in annoyance.

“No, I’m alright thanks.” You say dismissively and he’s about to go back to reading when you start to make noises again. Buggy finds it funny, but the anger coming off of Mihawk is making him too anxious to actually show it. The swordsman doesn’t even know if he should say anything or not, if giving you attention will only cause you to do more. You make the choice for him in the form of a question. “How old are you guys?”.

“43.” Mihawk answers first.

“39.” Buggy responds, he’s about to make a joke when your eyes widen.

“YOU’RE OLDER THAN BUGGY!?” You yell in shock while sitting up, surprising both men.

“Hey what is that supposed to mea-” Buggy’s interrupted as you stand up and use his face to push yourself to Mihawk. He looks up at you, his expression back to a calm one.

“I am.” He says and you stare at him.

“There’s no way! Buggy looks way older than you. I figured you were probably old since you’re the world’s greatest swordsman, sure, but older than him!?”

“HEY! I LOOK GOOD FOR MY AGE!” Buggy yells from behind you, rubbing his face.

“The clown does indeed look older than he is.” Mihawk agrees and Buggy starts to argue. Your brain goes blank and you space out, Buggy’s voice fading. You come to, your own voice snapping you out of it.

“World’s oldest swordsman.” The words exit your mouth and you immediately burst out laughing. Buggy’s eyes widen, then he grins.

“Haha I gue-” Yoru is pressed to his neck. “I WASN’T EVEN THE ONE WHO SAID IT!” He yelps as you fall to your knees and onto your side.

“W-Worl- HAHAHAHA” Your stomach hurts, and you’re starting to get lightheaded. “World oldest swordsm-AN!” Your voice cracks, laughing too hard to even notice Buggy’s pleas for you to shut up, blade getting closer to his neck with every second you laugh. Mihawk can handle being made fun of, but he will not tolerate it from Buggy of all people.

Garp rlly beats the shit out of his kids and shows how unfun and corrupt the marines are by not even listening to them completely then gets surprised when they don't want to be marines, bro what did you expect

Once saw a post where a person was sending an ask to someone that was just about how much they hate hiyori and shes a dumb bitch and they know that its not their fault but they hate her bc they love zoro and i was like "Damn bro i actually really like her character" I clicked on their page... zionist. Like proud zionist. The unreasonable hatred immediately made sense

gonna be honest gng idk where to go from here 🙏

Is This Love?

Luffy x Male Reader. Fluff. 2119 words. Part one, Part two, Part three

Desc: Luffy doesn't know what's going on but he does know that he enjoys eating fish.

Thump thump thump thump

Luffy bursts into the men’s quarters and flops onto his bed, putting his hand on his still thumping heart, “Hah… Hah…”

Thump thump thump thump

What’s going on? Is he having a poisonous reaction? But neither Chopper nor Sanji said anything. “Nnn…” No, it can’t be that, because it happened when you hugged him. That’s it! He’s just excited from being hugged by you after a whole week! He scratches at his heart… this doesn’t feel like excitement though. A scary thought pops into his mind as he starts to vibrate. ‘Am I dying!?’ If he’s dying why did he run away? He could’ve gone to Chopper but it was like everything in him told him to run, to get away. Like he just got caught trying to snag food while Sanji’s cooking or ate a week’s rations. “Uuuu..” He rolls onto his back and takes a big breath, letting it out to calm himself down. It’s okay, he isn’t dying and there’s no enemies, he isn’t in trouble either. It was just a hug from you. You used to do that all the time. You hugged him because you loved what he did. You loved it, you love him. Love.

THUMP

Dizziness starts to take over his mind again, as he shakes harder. Nonono. He wraps himself in his blanket hoping he’s cold but he feels too hot, kicking it off. Too excited, too dizzy, too much! He takes a giant breath and rolls back onto his stomach, letting it out and floating slightly before falling back onto the mattress. This is a mess, this is the worst. Then, a knock at the door.

“Hey, Luf, you in there?” Luffy flinches, it’s you. The door is unlocked, he was too panicked to lock it, but you knocked anyway to be nice. You aren’t sure why the captain ran off, after all. “Did you change your mind about giving me the fish? You didn’t have to run away, you can just tell me.” You’ve misunderstood, thinking Luffy ran because he wanted the fish but left to control the urges. But so has he, even if your voice is making him feel weirder. “You can still eat it, we can’t finish it all anyway.” On cue his stomach grumbles, fish does sound good right now. The captain looks down at his chest, he’s calmed down. That’s it, he’s just hungry, but what a weird type of hunger. Flip flops hit the floor as Luffy walks over, opening the door. “Oh, there you are. What happened?”

“I’m hungry.” He states, though his cheeks are still a bit flushed.

“...You sure? You look a little red, I mean you can eat anyway if you’re sick. You end up healing faster when you eat.” That’s true, but feels a little bad, not wanting to go back on his word. Especially when it’s for you.

“I caught it for you, though.” Luffy mumbles while he shifts in place. You think for a moment before replying.

“Okay. We’ll do this. I’ll eat as much as I can with the others, then you can have all the rest. Sounds good?” This brightens him up. That means he’s technically not breaking his word. He puts a hand over his chest, no quick thumping.

“Better.” He whispers, then he looks up at you and gives you a big hug, catching you off guard. It’s a little embarrassing but you did tell yourself you’d try to act normal again, so you hug back. He buries his face in your chest and everything’s normal.. until you hear him take a big sniff.

“???” You look down at him. “Did you just sniff me?” He looks up, resting his chest on your chest.

“You smell strong.” Weird, but if this put you off then you’d not have fallen in love with Luffy.

“..Thanks?” Could be a compliment.

“Mhm!” ..It was. Sanji was right. “Okay! Now let’s go!” Luffy hops up on your shoulders then points towards the deck. Cute. You run in the direction and he laughs before hitting his head on the top of the doorway. “Ack!” Oops.

____________________

Drool pools in Luffy’s mouth as he watches you eat. Intense, and it’s making you feel guilty for keeping food from him. “You don’t have to wait in here, you know. I can just call you when I'm full.”

“What if someone eats my food?” He’s nervous, staring intently at the fish on your plate.

“I’ll defend it.” Your tone is determined and his eyes meet yours.

“Promise?”

“Yeah.” You hold in your urge to hug him, your heart can’t take it right now, so you settle with petting his head. His eyes widen for a second before he smiles at you.

“Shi shi shi.” So cute!

‘Resist resist resist.’ You clench your jaw to hold it in, but it doesn’t matter since Luffy ends up giving you a quick hug before leaving the kitchen anyway. “Dammit..” You clench your fist on the table. When you look back at the others you notice everyone staring at you. It’s so obvious what they’re thinking, it pisses you off a bit so you take it out on Usopp. He gasps at your fork stabs into his food and shoves it in your mouth.

“Wha- Why only me!?” Too bad.

__________________

You pat your stomach with a content sigh. You’ve eaten a little less fish than being full to then save as much as you can for Luffy, but you’re still content. You want to spoil him, especially when he seemed excited about it. Enough to be upset and run away. “Hrm..” You hope he’s okay being kept from eating. Hopefully the variety of food will make it better. Grilled fish, fish soup, fish cake, sushi, lots of dishes that you can enjoy amazingly if you don't inhale it. You go outside and call for Luffy but there’s no answer. “Luffy!” You call again, now you hear the sound of hurried flip flops before he jumps on you.

“The smell was making me hungrier.” He had to go far so he couldn’t smell it. You chuckle a little then lead him back into the kitchen, setting him down once inside. His eyes widen with sparkles at all the food left. Here he’d thought there would only be a little, but you left so much for him. You smile when he looks at you gratefully.

“Hey, Sanji’s the one who made it, I just left what I couldn't eat for you.” To be honest there’s still some stored away, but you won’t say that for the chef’s sake.

“I’ll thank him later!” The captain yells and quickly stretches his arms to grab the pot of fish soup, immediately dropping it when it hurts. “HOT!” It’s falling! You run over and manage to catch it, wincing when the metal burns your hand. Still, you hold it and set it back onto the table.

“Here, be more careful.” You tell Luffy and give him cloths to use in order to hold the pot safely. He nods and uses them, tilting the soup into his open gullet happily. While he’s demolishing the soup you put your burnt hand under the sink, running cold water onto it. A minute passes and you hear Luffy put the empty pot down, grabbing sushi and putting it in his mouth before he finally notices what you’re doing. ‘Whar happefed” His speech is muffled by the food as he walks over to you.

“Burned my hand catching the pot, but it would’ve dropped otherwise.” You explain with a sigh. Fast reflexes but you wish you’d grabbed a cloth. Now your hand is burnt and you’ll have to go to Chopper later. The captain swallows the sushi in his mouth and stares at your burnt hand, then his safe ones. He’s fine because he let go immediately, but now you’re hurt because of it. He should’ve been the one to put it back on the table, but he wasn’t, and now you’re injured. He stretches his hand to grab a piece of sushi and puts it to your mouth. “Luffy I’m fu-mmphh”

“Get better.” He states and you chew it. It’s good, made by an excellent chef, but you really don’t want to eat more. Still, you can’t disobey your love so you swallow it. “.. ‘m sorry for dropping it.” Wow, he apologized. Maybe because you actually got hurt because of it. He sounds guilty too.

“It’s okay, the soup is good and I didn’t want you to miss it.” You tell him and go back to your hand. “I knew you’d love it.”

Thump thump

Luffy flinches and puts a hand on his heart, it feels weird again. He scratches at it as you sigh. You’ll have to go to Chopper but it’ll burn worse once you take your hand out of the water. Still, you take a deep breath and bite the bullet. “I’m gonna go to Chopper, enjoy the food!” You say quickly and hurry to leave the kitchen before the pain gets worse, not noticing the rubber man watching you every step of the way. Once you’re gone he shifts around uncomfortably. He did love the soup, you’re right. He loved it a lot, but now his chest feels weird. ..Maybe it’s just heartburn. Luffy gulps down a glass of water and gets back to eating, trying to ignore what’s happening. The food tastes duller.

Meanwhile

“Owww…” You’ve made it to Chopper and he’s started patching you up. The ointment being put on is good for you but it burns so bad. You have to grit your teeth when the reindeer gauzes up your hand after.

“You should’ve just let it fall!” He’s upset you hurt yourself over some soup. The doctor would get it if Luffy, maybe even Sanji, burned themselves to catch a pot of food; but not you! The door suddenly opens, it’s rubber boy. He’s holding fish cakes in his arms.

“What’re you doing here?” You ask him but he just takes a bite of the fishcake, chewing and swallowing before a content smile forms on his face.

“Tastes better!” He states happily, casually squeezing himself on your other side.

‘aaaaaaaaaa’ He leans against you. So close, basically on your lap. To be honest you're not complaining but why is he so close?

“Luffy be more careful! And don’t eat in here. You’ll get crumbs on the bed.” Chopper scolds him but the captain just rests his head on your arm, tilting it up to look at you with a small frown. Dammit, he’s too adorable. What’s worse is ever since you confessed you’ve become even more sensitive to his presence instead of less. There’s crumbs on his lips and he licks them to get it off.

“I don’t wanna, my food doesn’t taste as good without (Y/n).” He likes you!? Wait, that could just mean he doesn’t like eating alone, makes more sense. He continues to stare at you and puts a fishcake in his mouth. “Wanna shtay.” His face is so close, the other side of the fish cake is pressing against your lips and he’s only getting closer. It's not long before you have to open your mouth to avoid making a mess, biting into it as he looks into your eyes. Before anything else happens a small voice speaks.

“Um..” Chopper is still sitting there, now rather awkwardly. Even if he doesn't understand what you two are doing he does understand that you’re both getting crumbs on the bed.. and while ignoring him. Once you become aware of his presence you inhale and start to choke on the fishcake, pulling back to cough. It makes the reindeer panic as he turns into his human form to squeeze your stomach til you hack out a piece of fishcake onto the ground. Gross.

‘What a waste…’ Luffy stares at the discarded fishcake.

“Luffy don’t even think about eating that! And get out!” The doctor has had enough, picking the captain up and kicking him out of the office to tend to you properly. Once outside Luffy pops the rest of the fishcake in his mouth.

“Weird.” He doesn’t understand why he was getting so close to you. He just felt like it was right for some reason. In fact, he felt like the fishcake was in the way. That it was stopping him from looking at you properly. He wants to look at you more, see all of the expressions on your face. His mind wanders to the one where you look a little embarrassed. That one is his favorite. Yes, he needs to see that one more often.

Thump thump

This is taking more chapters than I thought.. hope you don't mind. At this point I don't actually know if this is going to be slow burn or average burn. I was planning on putting more romance into this chapter but it just felt.. wrong. So I scrapped and rewrote it. This isn't really my best work either. I feel like i could write this better, make the flow better, but I keep writing these when I'm tired and I'm too impatient to just wait to post it and proofread it again when I'm well rested. Sorry about that.