Evan, Coming Out Of Closet: I Don't Like ... Women.

i like my men BEAT UP and BLEEDING OUT on the pavement!!!

Hey so um do you want to have a really fucked up dynamic with me or not

the black sisters are tall and the black brothers are short. hope that helps

i would make such a beautiful dead bird on the sidewalk

DARRRRLINGGG GUESS WHO'S BACK FROM JAIIIILLLL

-But it's Barty standing in front of Evan's grave

it’s 2028. trump is dead. elon is dead. zuckerberg is dead bezos is dead they’re all dead

this blog is actually me dissecting my own corpse in an anatomical theater and you are all standing up on the rows looking down at me cheering and booing 

one million percent

medical malpractice? not to me. not if it’s you.

i thought i was an evan kinnie but i might have to reconsider 😨

Barty Crouch Jr is the kind of guy to eat paper. Not even just as a child, but like as a whole ass teenager in the middle of class.

like

Evan: *doing classwork* Hey, B, do you have the answer to- oh my god-!?

Barty, with half a sheet of paper hanging out of his mouth: *muffled* what?