They're Always Eating Everything

Tim, slightly drunk: I told you all that I lost my spleen, but I actually know exactly where it is, because Ra’s keeps it in a jar on his bedside table.

Jason, also drunk: THATS WHAT THAT IS?!?!

Tim: you’ve seen it? HOW HAVE YOU SEEN IT?!

Jason: I had to take Damian to visit Talia at the league!

Tim: AND YOU ENDED UP IN RA’S BEDROOM?

Jason: every time I go there I put an assortment of miscellaneous vegetables in his bedding to convince him he’s going insane.

Tim:

Tim: that’s actually kinda cool.

Jason: it’s the only thing that makes escourting the kid back and forth worth it.

Damian, twelve, Tim and Jason’s designated driver of the evening: I swear mother has assigned you to me like some sort of service dog, Todd.

Jason, nodding: or personal uber.

Tim: come to think of it I have seen you lay your head on him whenever you think he’s anxious-

Jason: HE SAYS IT HELPS-!

Damian: -fucking stay out of it, Drake!

Tim: aight damn

no shade but damian pursues every girl he's been into in canon even if he is a little shy. why cant he be the one to ask jon out. why is every other fic damain refusing to acknowledge his feelings and being weird about it

All my baby Damien art!🍼🦇

He was allowed to go on patrol alone. Little does he know the rest of the batfam is cleaning every single place he goes so he doesn't have to fight.

I'm not good at...drawing in general. LMAO, NO. I'm not good at backgrounds, I suck at drawing backgrounds, but I had this idea so I forced myself to do this.

I like to think Bruce tells his children to not eat nothing while being on patrol and Damian is confused because, he wants to drink his apple juice! So he hides one in his utility belt and drinks it when he thinks no one's around.

Next day there's a whole publicity of the apple juice's brand saying that their apple juice is so good even Robin drinks it, with a picture of him drinking the damn apple juice.

Damian feels betrayed.

He changes apple juice for grape juice.

In dishonour of whatever that new Harley Quinn series is, here’s my Nightwing!

Design notes

Damian (in between chewing his sandwich): Grandfather, you have that skibidi Ohio rizz.

Ra's Al Ghul (perplexed at what he just got called): I have the what what what?

Bruce chuckled, wiping his nose as he did. Damian quickly swallowed his food, eager to clarify his point.

Damian: It means you're uncool and bad at flirting.

Ra's Al Ghul (debating if he's going insane): That doesn't make any- You said a state in the middle of that.

Damian: It's how some of the kids talk at school. You're also the opposite of sigma.

Damian snickered, a grin plastered on his face as he watched the gears in his grandfather's head grind to a halt, imagining steam billowing from his ears. Ra's turned to Bruce, one eyebrow raised, an expression that was equal parts anger and confusion.

Ra's: I'm aware he's autistic, but unless I missed the part where they have brain damage, this is not normal behavior. What brainwashing have you been putting this child through?

Bruce (texting Selina): You're blaming the wrong person. Kids are going through their brain rot era and Damian is getting caught in the crossfire.

Damian (pointing at the man): Grandpa, you have negative aura.

Ra's (slapping the boy's hand away and then pointing to a corner of the room): Alright now that one I know is an insult! Time out, go to the wall and stare at it for ten minutes!

Damian sucked his teeth but eventually stood up, walking over to the wall and staring at it. Though he was enjoying practicing the latest, terrible Gen Alpha slang especially to annoy his family with, he still maintained respect with his elders.

Damian: He's just salty he has skibidi ohio rizz.

Ra's and Bruce (in unison): Stop saying that like it means anything! Oh great, now I'm agreeing with him! Look what you made me do!

I think Jon is a very intense version of Superman. He’s a kid given this big responsibility and almost no control on his very extreme emotions. I think he can get a bit erratic, I think he’s worn out his goodwill faster than Clark ever did or will. I also think Damian is more of a shining light in Gotham than Bruce ever was because Damian demonstrates change. He knows the city is hopeless but he also thinks it’s worth it because he changed. He knows how the blood on his hands felt and how it felt when he washed it off.

This is why when I like the demon Jon and angel Damian motif better than the inverse.

I think Damian definitely loves handling things by himself but I also think if Clark took a dig at him he’d tattle to Jon immediately. “Your Father accused me of being a bad influence.” Because what worst punishment can Clark be given then his son being mad at him? He definitely takes that shit to heart

Kid!Tim, showing Robin his room: So we have my photography cubby, not to be confused by my homework cubby. Then my desk, bed, conspiracy wall, wardrobe, other desk for my conspiracy wall-

Robin!Jason, nodding along with a fake smile. Pointing towards a side desk with candles and several framed photos of Batman: And what’s that over there.

Tim: oh that’s just my Batman shrine.

Jason: Ah.

Tim: Anyway! This is the kennel for all four of my stuffed dogs, my bookshelf for my conspiracy wall-

This came to me in a dream so bare with me people

Bruce gets a boyfriend/girlfriend or whatever just to keep the media at bay or something along those lines. But then… he actually kinda likes them??

And Bruce is confused as everyone else is about it but he isn’t gonna look a gift horse in the mouth (or whatever that saying is) and he starts genuinely going out with him

His kids and everyone who knows his secret identity are rightfully cautious about it. I mean, Bruce doesn’t have the best track record with relationships, but as long as the man is happy. They just hope there won’t be too much push back when Bruce inevitably blows it up 

They love Bruce but literally no one has any faith in him to keep the relationship for long. They’re are very obviously doubting him and it makes Bruce feel discouraged but he tries not to show it

And then one day, Bruce is having a jolly good time at a gala (at least pretending to) and he gets called by his partner. He’s talking to the cameras and suddenly his partner calls him. His face lights up and the press kinda pressure him to put the call on speaker.

Everyone’s seen his partner, in fact, they seem to soak up the media presence like a sponge. Bruce logically doesn’t think they’ll mind, but just in case he wants to tell them immediately

He accepts the call and before he can get a word out, his partner is saying the most vile and ridiculous things to him.

Dude talks about how he’s disappointed that Bruce hasn’t had sex with him yet and how he never expected the Brucie Wayne to be such a prude and stop his advances. He’s says that the only reason why he put up with Bruce was to get into his pants and since they’ve been dating for five months with no action, it wasn’t worth it anymore. Dudes already been getting action from someone else and he hangs up without letting Bruce say a thing

Bruce’s entire face falls and he’s genuinely devastated. The gala goes quiet and Bruce excuses himself, embarrassed and heartbroken.

He’s trying to stop himself from crying but he just experienced his first real heartbreak in a long time that absolutely wasn’t his fault

His family say is not his fault but Bruce doesn’t believe them because he’s conditioned himself to believe that everything is his fault and he knows that didn’t believe in him in the first place

That’s it