Latest Posts by vintagestarlight - Page 3

First of all, I’ll give you that a lot of talk around Captain Carter is weird and clearly about something else, but some of it - particularly some of it from yesterday and today isn’t, and y’all damn well know it. I like Peggy just fine, I do. I have defended her, but some of y’all are starting to get very weird because people have rightfully expressed their concern at the lack of Sam content. Sam is Captain America. It’s not weird that people want to see him. What is weird are these antagonist and passive aggressive posts I just saw in the Sam Wilson tag.

Sam Wilson is Captain America.

Sam Wilson has a pretty decent following.

Sam Wilson fans want to see him in multiple projects.

What’s not clicking for y’all????

And if you’re gonna be a deliberately obtuse dick about it, then stay out of his tag. Jesus Christ

I saw your ask on another blog and thought I'd share what helps me! I find heading over to spotify and scrolling through my playlists helps. Sometimes I find a song title that's perfect, or one that inspires me.

Hope you're well 💜

Oh my gosh you're literally one of my fav writers I can't even believed you followed me!!

I never thought of that! Thanks for the advice!💚

Fics take me so long because I write 10 words and then scroll mindlessly through 3 different apps for 2 hours

Online school in a nutshell

I'm doing good! I'm glad to hear you're doing better here lately 💕💕💕💕

How are you doing??

Hello my dear! How have you been getting on? Always lovely to hear from you 😊

Not gonna lie, the past 4-5 months have been rather awful, but weirdly I've had a stable and okay few days which has been really nice. Praying that the nice stability continues!

How about you, how are you?

Headcanon Game - A to Z (NSFW)

Hey guys! I thought I’d so something fun this weekend, so I did my best to sexualize the alphabet and turn it into a headcanon game!

So here’s how it works. You send me a character (or a few), and the corresponding letters that you want me to answer for them!

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex) B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person) D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?) F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual) G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc) H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.) I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)  J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon) K = Kink (One or more of their kinks) L = Location (Favourite places to do the do) M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going) N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.) Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.) R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.) S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…) T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?) U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make) W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice) X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words) Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?) Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

I’ll have this running all weekend, so feel free to drop by!

Omg I love you!! Thank you so much it's been a stressful week!💕 don't be hard on yourself either!

pls, pls, pls, don’t lie abt your ages. this is a very serious legal issue for us who are of age. stay the fuck away from this blog if you are under 18.

A lot of sleeping for me too! My week was okay pretty stressful with my courseload but I was able to use these snow days that my school had to catch up!💕

Hi Geeky just checking in to make sure you're taking care of yourself! Are you looking forward to the weekend?💕💕

Hello there! 💕 Hope you're taking care of yourself too, how was your week? I am yess, very worn out and drained this week, so lots of sleeping is in order! (And of course a big Taco Bell order tonight) Yourself? Xx

Sfksfks thank you😖😖

You love yourself too💕

from the valentine's asks, 14 + 43 🤩

I love doing these!

14. Favorite Candle Scent

Honestly anything to do with amber! I really love cozy scents!

43. Favorite ABBA Song

Honestly it's a tie between Honey Honey and Mamma Mia

Thanks so much for the ask!!

valentine’s day asks!

do you have a crush on anyone?

what’s your favorite candy?

favorite love song?

what was your first kiss like?

what was your last kiss like?

sexual/romantic orientation?

do you prefer poems or love letters?

favorite fanfic trope?

have you ever been in love?

favorite milkshake flavor?

dinner dates or brunch dates?

favorite flowers?

favorite perfume/cologne?

favorite candle scent?

what’s your ideal first date?

favorite love story?

what’s the most attractive thing a person could wear?

chocolate, vanilla, or red velvet?

snow, rain, or sun?

sweetest romantic memory?

favorite dating sim (and favorite character)?

fictional crushes?

what’s your dream wedding like?

what makes you blush?

do you believe in love at first sight?

do you believe in soulmates?

denim jackets, leather jackets, or bomber jackets?

what’s your sign?

are you single?

do you prefer to charm, or be charmed?

guitar or piano?

favorite romcom (or any romantic movie)?

do you fall in love easily?

valentine’s decorations: yay or nay?

would you prefer to propose or be proposed to? what’s your dream proposal?

cloud gazing or star gazing?

do you like to dance?

what’s your OTP?

kittens or puppies?

coffee, hot chocolate, or tea?

favorite soda?

do you prefer gazing wistfully out the window or lying dramatically over the sofa?

favorite ABBA song?

fuck/marry/kill? (anons name 3 people of your choice)

favorite pajamas?

favorite liquor?

do you think about love a lot?

a walk in the park or a walk on the beach?

hand kisses or nose kisses?

what’s your dreamhouse?

Oh my gosh thanks for the tag Dest i love doing these! I listen to a variety but 10 of my favorite songs by different artists would have to be:

It's been a long long time-Harry James

Fly Me To The Moon-Frank Sinatra

Toss A Coin To Your Witcher-Joey Batey(from The Witcher)

Unstoppable-Sia

Call Me By Your Name- Lil Nas X

I Don't Want To Set The World On Fire-The Ink Spots

The Drunkard Song(There Is a Tavern In The Town)-Rudy Vallee

Acapulco-Jason Derulo

La Vie En Rose-Louis Armstrong

Pink Shoe Laces-Dodie Stevens

I'm going to tag a few people but no pressure💗: @historygeekfics @princess-evans-addict

ten song memes ✨

list 10 songs you really like, each by a different artist, and then 10 tag people to do the same.

tagged by @mrdumpling & @icouldhyperfixatehim (thank you babes!!! 💕)

elvis song - maisie peters

death stranding - chvrches

just friend? - nanon korapat

the only heartbreaker - mitski

perfectly out of place - dreams we’ve had

summer lover - cub sport

quiet - exes

overdrive - conan gray

we’re not friends - ingrid andress

backseat - charli adams

tagging: @nosiidam @wack-overflow @fushiguroo @liyazaki @florbexter @taeminie @iamgwenslongroadhome @nattawins @someonek111me @wkxs @tinbramble

I love these they're perfect! Thank you so much @maysdigitalarts for these lovely banners! Please go check them out!

Hi I was wondering if you were taking requests? I really love your 18+ banners and your "I do not consent" banners! The green ones don't fit the green theme I have I was wondering if it's possible to get a different green color for them? I hope this made sense!😅

Hi! Yes of course this is ok, and it made perfect sense:) I added a couple just incase you wanted different letter coloring and a little extra something for you as well! :)

Here you go! I just matched the green on your theme, I hope that was ok :D <3 Thank you for requesting!!

I hope you’re having a great day 💕

Thank you love!! I hope you're having a fantastic day too!!💕💕💕💕

Reminder

18+ means 18+, not “I’m 14 but I don’t get offended by your posts” or “I’m 16 but I’m mature for my age”

// If you’re a minor, get off my page, this isn’t for you //

hardcover or paperback? bookstore or library? bookmark or receipt? stand alone or series? nonfiction or fiction? thriller or fantasy? under 300 pages or over 300 pages? children’s or ya? friends to lovers or enemies to lovers? read in bed or read on the couch? read at night or read in the morning? keep pristine or markup? cracked spine or dog ear?

Thank you for tagging me! I love these games! I'll tag a few of my favorite writers!(please let me know if you'd rather not be tagged!)

No pressure tags: @princess-evans-addict @worksby-d @agentofbarnes

This or That tag game

thanks for the tag darling @taeshobipop 💕🌻 these usually make me think too hard about things that should be easy lmaooo

hardcover or paperback? bookstore or library? bookmark or receipt? stand alone or series? nonfiction or fiction? thriller or fantasy? under 300 pages or over 300 pages? children’s or ya? friends to lovers or enemies to lovers? read in bed or read on the couch? read at night or read in the morning? keep pristine or markup? cracked spine or dog ear?

tagging @kookieswan @still-with-koo @hobipost @kookiecrumb @kookiesbuckethat @minyfic @jimilter @jimeanour @eureka-its-zico and anyone else who want to!

Definitely reach out again! If they said they'd be in touch and they weren't be persistent! You deserve an answer at least from them!🤍

Advice needed (if anyone sees this - if no one sees it, I never wrote it haha):

Should I, or should I not, try emailing the one casting director I know again?

For context, this person gave me a chance and sent me an audition a year ago. I didn't get the part, but they said they still liked the tape and would send me other stuff, but then I never heard back. So I chased them up around July 2021 just to check in and see if there was anything suitable for me that had come up, and didn't hear back again.

I mean, in all likelihood they're probably very busy, or I'm just not what they're looking for, or they've forgotten who I am because they'll have loads of people contacting them every day, but what's the harm in sending another polite email?

I honestly don't know how this 'put yourself out there/be persistent' etiquette thing works and I never have 🙈 Don't wanna harangue someone, but it's hardly haranguing if I last emailed them in July, right?

Black Authors : Check The Original Post for UPDATES!

Here’s a list of Black authors. Masterlists are linked when available. Please send me a dm/ask for other authors recommendation or feel free to add to this list. I’m going to tack this on to my masterlist! Check the original post for updates!

Edit: The reason why I started this list!

Also blogs listed here could be 18+ to 21+

My Masterlist

@marvelmaree - Masterlist

@tgigoldie - Masterlist

@amethyst-dreams-and-candy-canes -  Masterlist

@xxindiglow - Masterlist

@golden-ariess -  Masterlist

@blackmissfrizzle -  Masterlist

@lotusss-flowerbomb -  Masterlist

@rasberrylemon -  Masterlist

@singeramg -  Masterlist

@angrythingstarlight - Masterlist

@thehomierobbstark - Masterlist

@kittykatlow - Masterlist

@babiiface95 - Masterlist

@siancore - Masterlist

@avintagekiss24 - Masterlist

@xxshewritesinblacknwhitexx - Masterlist

@sparklemichele - Masterlist

@2smittinkittin -  Masterlist

@nuns-and-roses -  Masterlist

@royallyprincesslilly -  Masterlist

@honeychicanawrites -  Masterlist

@helahades -  Masterlist

@laketaj24 - Masterlist 

@melaninfics - Masterlist

@that-damn-girl - Masterlist

@emjayewrites -  Masterlist

@fullofmelaninsarcasmandepression -  Masterlist

@honeyandpeaches - Masterlist

@allaboardthereadingrailroad - Masterlist

@madamslayyy - Masterlist

@soufcakmistress - Masterlist

@buckybarnesplumwhore - Masterlist

@crushed-pink-petals-writes - Masterlist

@tropicalcap - Masterlist

@blessedboo  - Masterlist

@jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 - Masterlist

@peacefulwriter88 - Masterlist

@emotchalla - Masterlist

@canumoveurseatup-no - Masterlist

@thetaoofzoe - Masterlist

@futureauthor-mabye - Masterlist

@evansweaters - Masterlist

@caffeinated–writer - Masterlist

@gothgirlmahi - Masterlist

@kaykayvoltage53 - Masterlist/Blog

@bamposworld - Masterlist/Blog

@bowtothepapergods - Masterlist

@brattyfics - Masterlist

@breanime - Masterlist

@blackgirlimaginesmarvel - Masterlist

@twistedcharismaaa - Masterlist

@ctrlsznwrites - Masterlist

@islandvamp   - Masterlist

@whiskey-cokenfanfic - Masterlist

@fluoresensitive - Book: On Sundays, She Picked Flowers

@solarfantasies - Poetry

@writeturnlove - Masterlist

@teakturn - Masterlist

@cherienymphe - Masterlist

@thetaoofzoe - Masterlist

@awesomerextyphoon - Masterlist

@thegodswife - Masterlist

@thesoutherngirl

@uzumaki-rebellion - Masterlist

@syntheticavenger - Masterlist

@dramaqueenamby - Masterlist

@goddessofthundathighs -Masterlist

@queenoftheworldisdead - Masterlist

@peachyvulpixie - Masterlist

@appropriate-writers-name - Masterlist

@hauntedelation - Masterlist

@lifeasKim - @shewillreadyou - Masterlist

@khoicesbyk - Masterlist

@dcbbw - Masterlist

@shaekingshitup - Masterlist

@softpedropascal - Masterlist

@tchallasbabymama - Masterlist

@artemiseamoon - Masterlist

@ajxlawley - Masterlist

@mianorth - Masterlist

@thekrazykeke - Masterlist

@supremethunda - Masterlist

@mauvecherie-writes - Masterlist

@afriendlyblackhottie - Masterlist

@punani - Masterlist

@bakarilennox  - Masterlist

@tomhardydallasstarsgirl - Masterlist

@crackheadgeminibby - Masterlist

@i-the-hell-is-bvcky - Masterlist

@victoria-daydreams - Masterlist

@daisy-birb - Wattpad - AO3

@princessphilly - Masterlist

@girlygirl14534 / @amyverse - Adventures of Amy  Masterlist 

@kikilefangirl - Masterlist

@joannasteez - Masterlist

@goddessofthundathighs - Masterlist

@ramp-it-up  -  Masterlist

@thanatosfic - Masterlist

@magicxc - Masterlist

@cardierreh15 - Masterlist

@viva-asgardia-writes - Masterlist

@fictioninmyblood - Masterlist

@specialk-18​ - Masterlist

Oh this was so much fun! Here's mine❤️

Let's play dress-up games! 🥰

Something nice and fluffy and fun! It's simple: make a dress-up doll (or several), and reblog this post with your character. Make yourself, make an OC, make your favourite character - anyone you like!

If you have your favourite doll maker, you can use that, but I've included some suggestions below.

The two makers I've used are for femme-presenting folks, and were drawn by @ummmmandy 💖

Her dress-up doll maker is here: https://www.dolldivine.com/dress-up-schmess-up.php

And here's the face one: https://picrew.me/image_maker/114808

There are also these fabulous sites where you can find dress-up dolls for different genres, characters, and gender expressions:

https://www.dolldivine.com/

https://www.azaleasdolls.com/index.php

https://meiker.io/games/tag/dress-up-game

Here are mine, I made myself using ummmmandy's makers...

(Although I'm a lot shorter in real life and my eyebrows are more wayward!)

Over to you, let's see your dress-up dolls! 🥰

So cute🥺

My request sent before I could finish typing!!! I'm so sorry!

So for Steve Rogers or Bucky Barnes with romance and 👄 thanks so much!!! Again so sorry!!!

Thank you so much for your request 🥰 I haven't written a lot for Steve now that I think about it, so I'm making this a Nomad!Steve fic (because that beard is glorious).

Festive Sleepover Requests

💋 - My place, or yours?

Warnings: Flirting, hints at smut, a little alcohol consumption, Steve being a flustered adorable darling, kissing.

Author Note:

The reader can decide where this fic is set and what they do for work, I've been deliberately vague with the details.

I have to say, writing a romance in 1,000 words or less is tricky, so I hope this came out well!

It took you a while to notice him, sat across the bar, in the corner of the room. Broad, bearded, and very handsome, you were surprised that you hadn’t clocked him before.

Usually when you noticed a man looking at you in a bar, it felt a bit unsavoury. But something about this man felt different. His eyes didn’t linger too long, he wasn’t sizing you up. It was a look of understated admiration, curiosity, not an impersonal, lustful stare.

Your work friends had left half an hour ago, heading home to their partners or wanting an early night. For some reason, and you weren’t sure why, you had stayed a while longer.

For a moment you caught his eye, and he gave you a flustered, shy smile. And that’s when you recognised him, your heart leaping into your throat.

You hadn’t intended to develop a crush on Steve Rogers during your placement at SHIELD. But it was hard not to. The man was a rare sort. Modest yet principled and confident, kind-hearted, caring. To you he had been more than the superhero, he was a man with a heart and a conscience that you admired. And there had been something in return on his part, you had felt it, but how could either of you act on that when you were only posted for three months? That was the nature of your work, going where you were called.

Well, that was over two years ago now, and somehow you thought that you had forgotten all about it and shucked those old feelings.

Clearly not. How could you forget Steve?

As your eyes locked for more than a moment, you finished your drink, stood up and made your way over. He shuffled in his chair, eyes widening in surprise.

“Oh, you weren’t expecting me to come over?” You grinned.

“To tell you the truth, I wasn’t.” He said with a shy smile, his face reddening. “I wasn’t even sure you recognised me.”

“Well, the beard was a bit of a stumbling block.” You smirked.

Standing, Steve hugged you tightly, and you tried not to relax too much in his arms, tried not to inhale and be intoxicated by his smell again. Holding you at arm’s length, he beamed.

“It’s so great to see you.”

“I didn’t think our paths would cross again.”

“Neither did I, but I’m glad they have.”

“What brings you to this backwater?” You asked as you both took a seat.

He exhaled, puffing his cheeks in a kind of mock exasperation. “Let’s just say work troubles.”

“Yes, I heard about the fracas at Leipzig. Are you still on the run?”

Steve nodded. “Although by staying here we can fly under the radar a bit.”

“And you thought coming to a bar would be flying under the radar?” You teased.

“Hiding in plain sight!” He replied, finishing his drink with a self-mocking grin.

“I am glad you’re safe Steve, I tried not to worry about you when I heard what happened to the Avengers.”

“It’s more my team I’m worried about, keeping them safe, the least I can do for their trust and confidence in me. But thank you.” He sighed.

He was scant on the details of his situation, and you supposed he had to be. Instead, he wanted to know about you, how your life had been since you left the SHIELD placement. The whole time, he gazed at you, as though he couldn’t believe that he had encountered you once more.

Most of all, he wanted to know whether you were happy.

“I suppose. It’s a strange world. Alien attacks, Norse gods. I guess you have to find moments of happiness where you can.”

“I think you do.”

“What about you, Steve? Are you happy?” It was a loaded question and you knew it. Perhaps it was even inappropriate, but Steve smiled at you instead, his eyes moist.

“I am right now.”

“What do you mean?” You asked coyly, although really you already knew.

“It just feels kind of magic that I bumped into you tonight. I was kicking myself for years for not asking you out for a drink, or a dance.”

“I could have asked you.” You shrugged. “And I was only there for three months.”

“I suppose. Maybe I still had some old fashioned ideas about dating back then.”

“You sweet thing.” You whispered, somehow finding yourself closer to him, your knees brushing his thigh. Steve looked between your face and where your legs were touching, his lips parted.

“Well, maybe I’m not so old-fashioned in this regard.” He grinned, before leaning in and kissing your neck, his beard tickling you.

Your surprise gave way to joy. Letting go of your earlier restraint, you let yourself melt into him and kiss him back, his strong arms pulling you closer until you were almost sat on his lap.

“This is two years too late, Rogers!” You whispered against his mouth, before biting his bottom lip.

“I know, and I don’t want to let you slip through my fingers again.” He growled, sinking into another kiss, passionate and fierce, before pulling away and cupping your face in his hands. “I mean before… You felt it too, didn’t you?”

“I did. Perhaps it’s fate, or whatever you want to call it… Shall we continue this somewhere more private?”

“Yeah.” His kiss against your forehead was so soft compared to the passionate embrace you had been locked in before. “We can go to mine, but I’m not staying in the most ideal place to have guests!”

“Hiding out with the other fugitives?” You asked, playing with his collar.

“Yeah…”

“Mine then. Although it’s no palace I have to warn you.”

“You should see our safehouse!” Steve giggled.

“Not the Ritz?” You teased.

“They were booked up!” He countered with a smile, before going serious again. “Just as long as I can be with you tonight, forget things for a while, then I don’t mind.”

Support beginner writers 😊

I know it's hard sometimes. When the story is just awful, it's not original and you cringe the whole time while reading.

But then you realize something: the person had fun writing it. They wrote it with passion and they were confident.

They're propably just a child. They downloaded Wattpad or something to share their first stories.

They were so excited to share these stories. They were hoping someone would like it.

So you have two options.

1. You write them a hate comment that makes them cry and lose their motivation = they won't want to write anymore.

2. You write them a comment where you try to explain to them the things they've done wrong, but you also try to find the things you like about it and mention them. Try to give advice and be positive, end the message with a heart emoji and say that you're here to support them.

Because they will write more. And the stories will get better and better.

I believe in these people.

Please believe in them too.

@whatwasmyprevioususername

@coffee-n-icecream

My boys

please reblog this if it is okay to anonymously confess something to you.

Chapter 6: No One Else

Series Masterlist | Read on AO3

*Please do not plagiarise, copy, or repost anywhere else.

Pairing: 40s!Bucky x Autistic!Reader

*18+ only. Minors DNI. If you follow/reblog, please have your age (or an indicator of your age) in your bio.

Summary: You and Bucky reach a new stage of your relationship. Boundaries and broken, confessions are made, and you couldn't be happier.

Warnings: Smut (it's here at last, enjoy), fluff, risque humour, awkward sex story (reader's ex).

Author Notes: This is short, sweet, fluffy, and a little smutty. Y'all deserve it after the stress of chapter 5 (and so do I).

Click for full Author Notes

DISCLAIMER: The reader’s autistic traits are predominantly based on my own, but every autistic person is different and will display different traits in different ways.

That evening, you couldn’t stop crying. Peggy had been so mean, so unreasonable. Were you wrong to confront her? No, what she did was dangerous, and she had been reckless and inconsiderate. She needed to be confronted.

But what she had said in response? That hurt. Really hurt.

The next day you were quiet, ruminating. You had met Bucky after work for dinner and a stroll, but he had had noticed your change in mood. You could feel his concern, you knew you would have to tell him eventually.

Honestly was always best, you knew that, but that didn’t mean it was always easy.

It came out of you in a quick burst as you and Bucky were walking in the park together…

“Did you try and flirt with Peggy at the Whip and Fiddle, Bucky? After I left?”

Bucky tensed, then looked confused. The two of you stopped by some trees on the edge of the path.

You continued. “Because if we’re together, you and me, it really upsets me that you’d flirt with someone else. I don’t flirt with other people.” In truth, you didn’t really know how to flirt, but that was beside the point.

Bucky thought for a moment, then shook his head.

“I asked Peggy to dance, that’s all.” He said, and his voice had a reassuring tone. “Why, is she trying to stir things up? She has no right after that stunt she pulled with the pistol.”

“There’s nothing wrong with dancing. And honestly, I don’t expect you to never look at another woman again, because you’re only human and that dress was very lovely even if she got the fabric through slightly dubious means, but I suppose I’m also trying to get chocolate from the same spiv so I can’t judge, but anyway I sometimes look at other men and think they’re handsome, but obviously they don’t compare to you and I would always turn them down if they approached me,” You were rambling again, your mouth and your brain not working in sync, barely pausing for breath, “but Peggy said that you flirted with her, then said something to Steve about being invisible?”

Bucky’s eyes widened. He looked as though he didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. He had told you many times that he loved your rambles, but the current situation was serious.

He sighed. “Ah jeez, I didn’t think she was in earshot when I said that.”

“So it’s true?”

He nodded, and a chill ran up your spine, and tears started to prick your eyes.

“What did you mean by that?” You continued. “You were never invisible to me.”

“It was a joke, and I’d had one too many drinks.”

“I don’t understand.”

Bucky sighed, wondering how to put his feelings into words. “Before Steve got all… You know…” He trailed off as a mother with a pram walked past.

“Big and muscular?” You finished the sentence for him when the woman had passed.

“Yes. Before that, I was used to…”

“Having all the attention?”

Bucky nodded. “So naturally I’m feeling a little put out that he’s the centre of attention now. Call it ego I guess. It’s something I need to figure out.”

“So in that moment, you and Steve just became two peacocks, vying for the attention of the pretty peahen...”

Bucky’s mouth flickered in a smile at your metaphor, charmed by it. But you weren’t smiling.

He sighed. “I suppose we were, damn my eyes.”

You were disappointed, but sadly not surprised. Bucky was beautiful and charming, so it was no surprise that he would enjoy being the object of desire. You remembered the SSR base in Italy, watching him walk off with the nurse with that grin on his face, how she swooned over him in the mess hall.

Of course he would like getting that kind of attention. Even here in London, you saw women look at him, envying you, and you couldn’t blame them.

But you also knew your worth. You were intelligent, kind, warm, capable, and above all else, worthy of love.

If Bucky wasn’t going to value you, then you would end it here.

“Isn’t having one person who loves you better than being the centre of attention?” You asked him.

He laughed, his eyes crinkling. “You sound like Steve!” He said, but then his brow furrowed. “Wait, what did you say?”

“That having one person who loves you-“

“Not what you literally said, what you meant.”

Here it was. Your sweating hands shook uncontrollably as you forced the words to come to the surface.

“I love you, Bucky. But I value myself. If you won’t be good to me I don’t want this to continue. I don’t want you to break my heart.”

He gasped slightly at your frankness, frowning a little, weighing up what it would mean to lose you. Eventually, he smiled and shook his head.

“Well, I wouldn’t expect any less. You’re a wonderful woman, and you deserve the best. I love you too.”

“Really?” It was a silly question in hindsight, but you were so overwhelmed that all your logic had gone out of the window.

“Yes, really, you silly thing!”

“You have no right to call me silly after that bollocks you were spouting about being invisible.”

“No I don’t, I’m very silly.” He laughed, but then his face stiffened and he became serious again. “Look, there’s been no one else I’ve wanted, truly wanted, since I met you.”

“Is that the truth? You’re not just telling me what I want to hear, because everything has to be clear. I don’t do games. You know that.”

He put his arms around your waist, firmly, pulling you to him. Here he was, feeling like home again, and you relaxed.

“If I have to get over my old reputation as a ladies’ man and the old expectations, then that’s on me.”

“Yes it is.”

He laughed again, and buried his head in your neck. He liked putting his head there, you had noticed. It felt wonderful when he did it.

“I don’t think we should be staying out in this very public park.” He whispered, before kissing your jaw.

“No, we shouldn’t.” You replied as you idly played with his hair, leaning into him.

“Then what do you suggest, sweet thing?”

You had to pause, work up the courage to say it. But eventually the words came out.

“Come home with me. Stay the night. Properly this time.”

***

You couldn’t help but thinking back to what that nurse in the mess hall had said. Bucky really was beautiful everywhere.

He had looked a little shy when he had undressed in front of you, but you were so enamoured, so transfixed by him that his shyness was just sweet and endearing to you.

“I don’t know why you’re blushing.” You said. “You’ve already been in this bed with me in your underwear.”

“My underwear,” He laughed as he nervously fumbled with his shorts, “Not naked.”

As you got into bed together, he giggled as he climbed on top of you, burying his head in your neck once more.

“What is it?” You asked, stroking his back.

“I can just relax now. That day I came here and got into bed with you… I was trying so hard not to, you know…”

“Get hard? I wouldn’t have minded.” You laughed.

You opened your mouth again to explain how it was a perfectly natural response, and how some men got erections involuntarily by simply being relaxed, but Bucky kissed you before the words could come out.

“I love you.” He said softly. “You wonderful, beautiful, eccentric thing, you.”

***

You never knew how good it could be.

As you lay there, wonderfully still and blissful, you couldn’t help but grin.

Bucky lay on top of you, still resting within you as he kissed your neck softly. His eyelashes brushed your skin as he moved his head, the slight scratch of his stubble sending little shockwaves through your body. His heart pounding against your chest, his strong arms feeling so incredible as they clasped you tight…

Everything had been so good, so right.

Your very first time had been an awkward fumble in a beach hut when you were 18. It had felt nice, but only for a short while, because your poor boyfriend at the time had finished within a matter of minutes.

It had been quite the disappointment really. You had always experienced touch differently to other people, appreciated certain sensations more. You had wanted to take your time, running your hands over his skin, telling him where on your body to kiss you, to explore.

But that boyfriend had been messy, eager, he just wanted to ‘do it’. It was like some task he had to tick off, something he had to get done and out of the way. How sad, to treat something that had the potential to be so pleasurable, so pivotal, as something so frivolous and quick.

“Did that feel good?” That boyfriend had asked you, breathless and grinning as he hovered over you.

“Yes, but it was over too quickly for me to really enjoy it in the same way you did.” You had told him. “Perhaps we could do more things, or try again?”

Well, he had asked. Unless it was a rhetorical question? But why ask you if he didn’t want an honest answer?

He had looked heartbroken when you had told him that. Your relationship hadn’t lasted long afterwards, and the silly lad had never expressed what exactly had hurt him, or told you why he was suddenly so closed off. Perhaps he just didn’t know how to express it.

Perhaps this was why your best relationships had been with honest people, good communicators, good listeners.

Bucky had proven himself to be all of these things. Always alert, always checking in, communicating, making sure you were both happy and feeling good. And for once, you didn’t mind the eye contact. It felt natural with him in that moment.

A little while later, as you lay together, bodies sweetly aching and eyes heavy, Bucky readjusted himself and looked at you.

“You know we’re kinda screwed, lieutenant.” Bucky said softly, his voice sleepy and languid.

“I mean literally that’s true because we just-“ You began, but Bucky interrupted you.

“Not literally, silly!” He laughed, pulling you closer and nuzzling you.

“I know, it was a joke. So why are we metaphorically screwed, pray tell?” You asked, bopping him on the nose playfully.

“Because now we’ve got started on this whole sleeping together thing, I don’t wanna stop.”

“Neither do I.”

“So that might cause a few problems when we ship out again. I can’t see them letting us sneak into each other’s tents, we’d probably both get court-martialled.”

“Can they court martial people for sex?”

“I wouldn’t put it past Colonel Phillips.” Bucky jested.

“We’ll just have to find another woodland.” You said, only half-joking. But that tickled Bucky so much that he started to crease up with laughter, gripping your sides as his body shook.

“I fucking love you.” He gasped.

“I love you too. So much.”

***

“You have a spring in your step this week, lieutenant.”

That’s what your colleagues all said, as though you weren’t already aware.

You felt as though you were floating, walking on clouds. Although you could still work perfectly well, the main thing occupying your mind was Bucky, your sweet boy. The way he held you, how lovely his skin felt under your fingers, how good it felt when he made love to you, the soft earnestness in his voice when he told you that he loved you.

He loved you. He loved you.

How blessed you were, how lucky you had been to find each other when you did…

Your happy haze was broken when Peggy entered the room. Now that you were upset with her, there were few people in the office she could speak to about matters that weren’t work related.

Your shoulders instinctively tensed as you felt her presence. Sometimes it felt like a blessing to feel things more intensely than other people, other times it was a curse. You even flinched as she moved a little closer, hearing her take a deep breath as she braced herself to speak to you.

You pretended not to notice her. You had already told her how she had made you feel after all, and an apology still hadn’t been forthcoming. There was nothing more to say.

But instead, Peggy simply put a small parcel on your lap, which caused you to flinch. When you looked up at her, brow furrowed, she sat beside you and sighed.

She looked at you, almost as though she was expecting you to say something. When you remained silent and just looked between her and the parcel, she looked away, psyching herself up to speak.

“I was absolutely beastly to you.” She said at last.

“Yes, you were.” You murmured, not prepared to pander to her.

“I’m sorry. I really am.”

She sounded genuine, but really, it just wasn’t enough. ‘I’m really sorry’ was for careless transgressions, mistakes. The way she had spoken to you was deliberate and cruel. ‘I’m sorry’ just didn’t cut it.

Too angry to respond, you pressed your lips together as you thought of how to reply. Peggy laughed softly.

“What is it?” You snapped.

“I remember once, in one of your rambles, you telling me that ‘I’m sorry’ just doesn’t have as deep a meaning in English.”

You kept quiet. You had indeed told her that. You had told Bucky too. It was something you liked to tell everyone you felt comfortable around. But right now, Peggy bringing that up had you felt vulnerable.

Your rambles came out when you felt comfortable and happy around someone, and you doubted that Peggy would ever be privy to your rambles again.

You looked down at the parcel, working up the courage to hand it back to her and tell her to go away, when she said: “Es sehr tut mir leid, meine liebe Freundin.”

That touched you, you couldn’t deny it.

“Thank you for your apology.” You said, looking at her and forcing yourself to make eye contact. It wasn’t forgiveness, that you weren’t ready to give, but you did appreciate the gesture.

“I was very insecure,” Peggy continued, “I still am. I suppose I have a lot of my own demons on my shoulder and I ended up taking it out on both you and Steve.”

“Have you apologised to Steve too?”

Peggy shook her head. “It’s going to take a little longer to pluck up the courage.”

“Well, the team’s shipping out next week. You need to be quick about it. Who knows how long we’ll be gone for?”

Peggy looked as though she was about to say something, make an excuse, but instead she stopped herself and just nodded.

“Why don’t you open the parcel?” She asked you, gently.

A present would hardly make up for what she did, but you lifted the small parcel from your lap and started opening it. Your eyes widened when you saw the contents and you couldn’t help but smile. Inside was a bar of Cadbury’s Bourneville chocolate, and a packet of custard creams.

“Thank you, Peggy.” You sighed. It was a nice gesture for sure. “I’ve really missed these.”

“Anytime you want these, just tell me. Or anything else for that matter. Nylons, lipstick, anything. He has a very good supplier, so you can get anything you want. My way of making it up to you.”

She put her arms around you then. You hugged her back, although you weren’t enjoying it. You loved hugging your friends, but something had shifted in how you felt about Peggy. She had apologised to you, and you had accepted her gift, but things weren’t going to be the same.

Still though, perhaps time could heal things.

And you weren’t going to say no to getting all the chocolate and biscuits you could lay your hands on…

***

It was a lovely send-off before you all shipped out. Gathered friends, a few drinks, and luckily, the Fighting Cocks was nice and quiet that night.

You and Thea, ‘two roses among thorns’, sat with Bucky, Joey, and the rest of the 107th. Steve was absent that night, back at the SSR office, still working through plans and strategies and equipment. You hoped that he and Peggy had spoken, that she had apologised.

Sat around the pub table, the boys were trying to be brave, the drinks flowing freely, cracking jokes. Joey was reminiscing about his RAF days, egging the boys on to help them feel brave, but you and Thea knew very well that he was glad to never have to see the horrors of war again.

Joey was home, he could take his time to heal, both physically and mentally. But not your boys, and not your Bucky.

They were putting on a show of bravado, but you knew that they were afraid. Even Dugan, who never seemed to show any other emotion than joviality, you knew he was scared.

Bucky too. He had a duty, you knew that and respected it, he had to follow Steve. But he was still so shaken, so tired, still affected by what had happened to him when he was taken prisoner.

That thought made you instinctively reach for Bucky’s hand and squeeze it, and he looked at you, tenderly, as though he knew what you were feeling in that moment.

Thea had been regaling you all with a hilarious but chaotic story about the backstage antics that had occurred during the Christmas show at the Windmill.

It was a story she had already told you twice, but you loved it. If anything, knowing the story well made it even better, anticipating the twists and turns. There was also something calming about repetition for you, even when it came to stories.

“…And then Mr Van Damm walks in and shouts ‘Oi sonny, it’s just the tableau girls who are supposed to be naked in here!’ Poor Michael turned as red as a beetroot!”

The table erupted with laughter, and your foot started to twitch with excitement. It didn’t just happen when you were stressed.

There were times when you would have to suppress these little calming movements of yours, but not now, not among friends, or your family, as Bucky had rightfully called them.

“Moral of the story, never try to do your laundry backstage.” Joey chimed in.

“This is probably a daft question…” Falsworth began, “But don’t the girls get cold?”

“Oh it get surprisingly warm on stage my dear!” Thea told him. “You can be wearing next to nothing, but with the lights and the heat of all those bodies around you, you feel perfectly fine.”

“She’s speaking from experience by the way.” Added Joey, shooting an amorous gaze at Thea.

"Oh yes, at the Folies Bergère I once danced in a few strings of pearls and nothing more. Those were the days!" She laughed, although her voice had a twinge of nostalgia to it.

"I bet you were amazing! I'm not sure I could pull that off!" You giggled.

"Oh darling, you absolutely could, you have fantastic bosoms!" Thea said frankly.

Her comment took you by surprise, and you snorted as you began to crease up with laughter.

Dugan spat out his drink. Falsworth pressed his lips together, trying to be polite. Morita just laughed unashamedly, while Gabe translated the joke for Jacques, before both of them broke into fits of giggles.

Thea's eyed flicked to Bucky, whose expression you couldn't see.

"Yes! This one agrees! He's seen them! They are magnificent aren’t they?”

No Thea, stop right there.

Mortified, you looked over at Bucky, whose glass was poised just below his mouth. He thought for a moment, unsure of what to say.

All eyes were on him, an awkward silence descending over the table.

Whatever he said was going to incriminate him.

“A gentleman never tells.” He said eventually, before taking a big swig of his drink.

***

If you had to list the most awkward moments of your life, then this would be at the top.

You, Steve and Bucky in an empty meeting room, under the guise of Steve briefing you on the upcoming mission.

If only your colleagues knew the truth.

Instead of tactics, the subject to be addressed was your sex life.

You wondered how Steve had found out so quickly. Gabe was too discreet and conscientious, and it couldn’t have been Jacques because Steve spoke very little French. He wouldn’t have seen either Joey or Thea, they were more your friends after all, and Falsworth had been far too English about the whole thing, so you could rule him out too. That just left Dugan and Morita… Either was a likely culprit. Both liked their risqué jokes after all. But which one was it?

You sat with Bucky on one end of a briefing table, Steve on the other, just wishing the ground would swallow you up.

“So am I to understand that your relationship has become more… serious?” Steve said plainly.

Bucky’s lips were pressed tightly together, as though he was trying not to laugh. Steve was an old friend after all, his best friend, and hearing him talk this seriously about your relationship was undoubtedly very amusing.

“We’re sleeping together, Steve. Let’s not be formal about this.” He said plainly.

“Yes… We’re… Doing that. What he said.” You managed to mumble awkwardly, feeling heat spread across your face. How were you meant to finish your damn sentences when this was being talked about?

“How did you find out?” Bucky asked Steve, trying to stifle his laughter at the ridiculousness of the situation.

Dugan or Morita, one of those two. I know it is.

Steve cocked his head and smiled. “Bucky, how long have we been friends? I know you well enough to spot things. That and, you haven’t been sleeping at the SSR accommodation. I put two and two together.”

Oh my god…

I’m an idiot.

Of course…

“And there was me thinking someone had spilled the beans.” Bucky joked.

You weren't the only one, my love.

“Wait, am I the last to know about this?” Steve’s voice shook with nervous laughter, but he was a little hurt too, and why wouldn’t he be? You had to reassure him.

“No, no, it’s not like that!” You chimed in, and you told Steve about how everything had been revealed at the pub that night.

Steve smirked, amused, but you could also sense that he was relieved that Bucky hadn’t told the world about your exploits but left him in the dark.

“Wow… So Thea has more talents than we ever knew about!” Steve laughed.

“Yeah, the ability to sense whether or not someone has seen a pair of breasts.” You groaned. “It’s quite the skill.”

“As long as you’re having fun…”

“Well, it’s more than that.” Bucky interrupted, his voice serious, and you felt his hand reach for yours under the table. You squeezed it in response. “We’re in love.”

He said it so plainly, confidently, proudly.

The mixture of embarrassment and joy left you speechless. All you could do was squeeze his hand again, reassuring him that you felt the same, but of course he already knew.

Steve smiled fondly, looking between the pair of you.

“As long as you’re both discreet and it doesn’t affect your work, I have no objection. I won’t breathe a word of this to Phillips, but you have to do the same with keeping things under the radar.”

“Thank you.” You and Bucky mumbled in unison, relief washing over you. You weren’t sure how much of that relief was to do with Steve accommodating your relationship, or the fact that this uncomfortable situation would soon be over and you could hide away at your desk in peace once more.

“These are awful times,” Steve continued, “and if your love is helping you through, I’m not about to force you not to touch each other like some kind of Puritan. This team of ours, we’re not officially the army. We may have a code, but overall, their rules don’t apply to us.”

“Thank you Steve, so much.” Bucky said softly.

“I’m serious. You deserve a bit happiness, a bit of peace.” Steve replied, nodding, before turning to you. “Both of you.”

omg thanks for including me!!🥺💜

So since I’ve been away for a while and kind of on and off even before that does anyone have any fic or author suggestions? I feel like I’ve read almost everything of everyone I follow and then more too so if you have any suggestions please let me know! (Especially if they are ddlg related!)

My blog, is a 18+ blog. Minors DO NOT INTERACT. 

When I find that you have I will block you with the quickness. 

Now accepting curious anonymous messages 🌚